Relocation

[€uroMeinke]

Seeking advice and shared experiences of those who have ever pulled up their roots and moved to another part of the world.

As some of you know the company I work for is getting ready to emerge from bankruptcy by being acquired by another company. By the end of January I should either get a job offer from the new company, or will begin a job search for something else. If the new company makes me an offer, it will be contingent on my willingness to relocate. Right now that seems to mean Carlsbad, Houston, or Princeton – though other places are possible.

If I decline or don’t get an offer, but want to stick with something in the utility industry, I will also be entertaining a possible change in location in my future.

I know many of you have faced such decisions, and plenty have picked up and moved across the country. I hope those of you did will respond to this and let me know what that was like for you, what made it easier, what difficulties didn’t you expect. What was it like to build a new social network in your new location? Any thought or wisdom would be welcome.

One of my biggest fears as an introvert over 50, is that I will be lonely in my new environment, that it will be hard for me to find those I can connect to and do the things that will make that happen. Anything you can say about that would be most appreciated.

As things progress and I have a better idea of my options of where I may be heading I’ll likely come back with more questions. I just want to be prepared if my decision needs to be quick and my commitments binding.

Thanks everyone

[Strangler Lewis]

I haven't made any such moves as a mature person. However, I have thought about such things from time to time. Before I worried about how to build a flesh and blood social network, I would start thinking about what I could hope to sell my house for and how quickly and what areas in the vicinity of my new potential workplaces I could afford to buy into.

Good luck with it all. Keep us posted.

[RStar]

Oh, my. As one who prefers to settle in and stay (I've lived in the same housing tract for the last 18 years, had the same job for 33 years, and married my first real girlfriend and we are still together after 35 years) I cannot imagine what this may put you through. So I can't be of much help there.

If you do leave the area you will be missed! Keep in mind, that you will have a digital network of friends with you where ever you go! I wish you the best of luck which ever way it goes!

[alphabassettgrrl]

Moved from MN to MT. Difficulties? It was a college town and made socializing difficult if you weren't on campus. Also it was a very small town; not much of anything going on. Helped? Work relationships got me through.

Moved from MT to CA. Helped? Lots of social stuff available, groups and whatnot. The internet helped. Just getting out and being there. Living in an apartment we met a lot of people; living in a single-family house is isolating in a way that the apartment wasn't. There were communal spaces at the barbecues and the hot tub/pool, which was handy.

[Alex]

My stories of complete relocation as a solo youth aren't really of relevance unfortunately (moved to Hawaii for grad school with about $200 and one backpack), moved from Hawaii to the Bay Area because that is where Lani got a job).

In neither case did I ever naturally develop a new local social circle. In Hawaii the first 6 months were extremely lonely, but I think I"m more ok with that than most. Eventually got on the fringes of a school clique but wasn't ever in the heart of it. Lani came around in year 2.

In the Bay Area I've still never really made a friend that came about naturally due to me living here. I have two social groups physically located here:

1) Local people from the Straight Dope message board. This group isn't as active for me as it once was.

2) Local people from MousePlanet.

But I don't seem to have a strong urge towards in person interaction with others. It is no fluke that nobody really knew about my surgery in September, only once in the last three months had I seen anybody locally who might have noticed.

But I'd avoid Houston if that is within your power.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Maybe you should start a message board.

[DreadPirateRoberts]

Maybe you should start a message board.

VGDM

[RStar]

Maybe you should start a message board.

:D

[€uroMeinke]

Believe you me, I will try not to move to Houston - though every so often I think I would be okay living there. Come February I should have some more concrete decisions to make. The economic calculations will be relatively easy to make - the social ones less so.

Sadly as this thread has demonstrated to me, despite my love for the message board format it has been given a death blow by facebook. At least till an alternative rises.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Positives of Houston...it's close to Austin.

[Strangler Lewis]

And, I would assume, an hour by plane to New Orleans.

[Scrooge McSam]

And, I would assume, an hour by plane to New Orleans.

... and then a further 2.5 hour drive to Vicksburg. Bonus!

[Cadaverous Pallor]

The best thing about Houston is you can get away from it.

[RStar]

I heard Galviston is a blast durring huricane season!

[Alex]

For the record when I said to avoid Houston. I have absolutely no problem with the city. I've enjoyed myself the two times I've been there.

But for someone not genetically optimized for the climate, that part of it is awful.

[Snowflake]

I'm sure the best part of being in Texas would be the proximity to some good BBQ. Beyond that, I can't possibly comment.

I hope that wherever you land, the locals may not know it yet, but their swank level will have increased by your being there and they had damn well better appreciate it.

[3894]

what made it easier, what difficulties didn’t you expect. What was it like to build a new social network in your new location? Any thought or wisdom would be welcome.

What made it easier: joining what I couldn't beat. For example, the Wisconsin climate is a challenge to me who lived most of my first 30 years in the Bay Area. I try to get involved in outdoor wintery activities - Nordic skiing, ice skating, snow shoeing but always drawing the line at curling and any sport involving animal death and state licensing. Inside, I have growing potted spring bulbs. I also wear bright colors.

I think this idea can be applied to pretty much anything you hate about wherever you move. Join what you can't beat.

What I didn't expect: the food differences.

How to build a new social network: Tom and I are in the process of selling our place in rural Wisconsin and moving to Madison, a little over 100 miles away. It's just time for a change and time to be less isolated.

Tom is very social but he is not well. I am a good conversationalist but I am not much of a joiner. I am going to try to find congenial activities and see if that route works. I am excited for the new adventure and scared that I'm too old.


One of my biggest fears as an introvert over 50, is that I will be lonely in my new environment, that it will be hard for me to find those I can connect to and do the things that will make that happen. Anything you can say about that would be most appreciated.


I don't have answers but you and I will be going through the same stuff. I'll post about it if you will.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Go, Helen! I aspire to be as brave as you. :)

[3894]

:cheers: , CP!

Here's our theme song for this thread ...

http://youtu.be/r_krgBgGlXE

[Strangler Lewis]

Join what you can't beat? Why not? Tweak the spandex a little, and you're a rhinestone cowboy.

[Snowflake]

Ooh! 3894 Madison! It's on my list for a (possible) research trip in 2014. I have a good pal in Oconomowoc. If I make the trip and don't scare you off, lunch would be awesome!

[Stan4dSteph]

It always seems like a great idea, an adventure. I wish you luck.

[SzczerbiakManiac]

What I didn't expect: the food differences.For example...?

[Cadaverous Pallor]

:cheers: , CP!

Here's our theme song for this thread ...

http://youtu.be/r_krgBgGlXE

Visible Helen Mojo.

[3894]

Snowflake, I'd love to meet you! Just let me know when you're coming.

For example...?

Oh, SM, many's the time I have pined for decent takeout Chinese food. Or a non-Pillsbury croissant, the real kind. I honestly try not to be too Green Acres about this but sometimes ...

If you're familiar with Garrison Keillor's Lake Woebegon, that's pretty much where I live. Suffice it to say that I've been to more than my share of church basement potlucks. I like these people okay; I do not like their Chung King chow mein noodles-Cream of Celery Soup-Miracle Whip food much.

Here is an actual recipe that actually tastes good. You will have to suspend your disbelief.

A package of frozen meatballs
A can of Cream of Mushroom Soup (Have I lost you yet?)
A can of button mushrooms, including the liquid
and …..
Half a jar of Cheese Whiz! (At least I didn’t say Spam.)

Dump the meatballs in the crock pot, mix together the other ingredients and pour them over. Cook on low, 2-4 hours. Serve over noodles or rice or potatoes, if you like.

t always seems like a great idea, an adventure.

Yes. That's the attitude I'm trying to maintain.

[Gn2Dlnd]

Oh, yah, hot dish.

[Stan4dSteph]

Yes. That's the attitude I'm trying to maintain.I've never been to Madison, so perhaps it will be an excuse to come check it out sometime. :)

[3894]

I've never been to Madison, so perhaps it will be an excuse to come check it out sometime. :)

Somewhat like the People's Republic of Berkeley, Steph. Come on up!

Progress report:

Found an awesome house at an awesome price. Made an appointment with realtor.

Looked up crime stats. Three drive-by shootings since April, one in that block.

Cancelled appointment with realtor.

Found another awesome house. Looked up crime stats before contacting realtor. Two recent home invasions in neighborhood, plus assorted assaults, robberies, etc.

Need an unawesome house in an awesome neighborhood.

[Crystal]

Seeking advice and shared experiences of those who have ever pulled up their roots and moved to another part of the world.

As some of you know the company I work for is getting ready to emerge from bankruptcy by being acquired by another company. By the end of January I should either get a job offer from the new company, or will begin a job search for something else. If the new company makes me an offer, it will be contingent on my willingness to relocate. Right now that seems to mean Carlsbad, Houston, or Princeton – though other places are possible.

If I decline or don’t get an offer, but want to stick with something in the utility industry, I will also be entertaining a possible change in location in my future.

I know many of you have faced such decisions, and plenty have picked up and moved across the country. I hope those of you did will respond to this and let me know what that was like for you, what made it easier, what difficulties didn’t you expect. What was it like to build a new social network in your new location? Any thought or wisdom would be welcome.

One of my biggest fears as an introvert over 50, is that I will be lonely in my new environment, that it will be hard for me to find those I can connect to and do the things that will make that happen. Anything you can say about that would be most appreciated.

As things progress and I have a better idea of my options of where I may be heading I’ll likely come back with more questions. I just want to be prepared if my decision needs to be quick and my commitments binding.

Thanks everyone

This was one of my fears too when I made the move to LA on my own back in November. I have managed to make friends through work and by forcing myself to approach people when I am out and about. Made a new friend at my complex just by being friendly, introducing myself and letting her know I was COMPLETELY new to this environment.....like serious culture shock!!! She has shown me around and as I become more familiar with my surroundings, I venture out a little further and take more risks at being social. You just gotta put yourself out there. I hardly think that you will have any problem meeting people or acclimating to your new environment should you go :)

[alphabassettgrrl]

Hehehe... Helen, you made me laugh with that recipe. I grew up in Minnesota and it seems everything's made with cream of mushroom soup (or some other variant). But I will admit I'm still fond of hotdish of varying kinds. And Garrison Keillor makes me laugh. Those Lutherans! :)

Anybody tried to feed you lutefisk yet? :)

[3894]

Anybody tried to feed you lutefisk yet? :)

http://i1.cpcache.com/product/48026110/pray_for_me_im_married_to_a_swede_bumper_bumper_st icker.jpg?color=White&height=225&width=225

For those not familiar, lutefisk is dried cod soaked in lye, served with butter sauce. Texture: gelatinous. An example of Man's inhumanity to fish. Protip: go for the meatballs or ham at the smorgasbord.

Ugh, I am waffling on whether to live in Madison or in a town 30 miles out. To be fair, the town 30 miles out is a genuine, living arts colony.

[Snowflake]

Ooh, art colony!

[€uroMeinke]

Yeah, I'd pick Arts Colony too

[3894]

Ooh, art colony! - Snowflake

Yeah, I'd pick Arts Colony too -EuroMeinke

So, this was actually extremely helpful, Snowflake and EM. :snap:

After I read your comments, things evolved here to a decision to concentrate on the arts colony and other little towns within easy driving distance of Madison.

:cheers:

[Strangler Lewis]

Wait, wait! What does "arts colony" mean? It sounds fun, but I'd worry that it would be like living in a religious cult full of piety and unpleasantness. "Have you made enough art today, neighbor? Didn't write your 1,000 words? Mind telling us why?" I'd also worry that there'd be too many people with that artsy serenity that you just want to hit with a skillet. I'd dip a toe in now again, but I'd be leery about permanent residence.

[3894]

Didn't write your 1,000 words?

Currently writing third book with Tom. We're good. ;)

[€uroMeinke]

So I got my Federally required 60-day Lay-off notice today. Monday I interview with the new company - let's see if I get an offer or a big check. Now counting down to March 4.

[Snowflake]

Goog luck!

[DreadPirateRoberts]

Good luck

[Moonliner]

So I got my Federally required 60-day Lay-off notice today. Monday I interview with the new company - let's see if I get an offer or a big check. Now counting down to March 4.

Just a thought on the Interview process. I'd probably skip wearing the gold pants for that.

[Snowflake]

VMM

[Cadaverous Pallor]

<3 and luck

[Alex]

Though do wear the gold pants when interviewing for Houston jobs. That'll help make sure you're not put in the position of considering Houston.

[€uroMeinke]

Yeah, the electric blue is a far better choice for a utility job.

[katiesue]

Ugh - stressful. Fingers crossed for you.

[Strangler Lewis]

Good luck. Hope everything turns out the way you want it to.

[SzczerbiakManiac]

Luck you €uroMeinke
Though I know you don't kneed it cause you're an awesome guy!

[innerSpaceman]

I keep looking for the "Like" button for some of these comments, er, posts.

Yeah, I guess I really do belong on Facebook. But maybe I'll check the LoT more often than once-a-month.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Good luck on the job front!

[€uroMeinke]

It looks like the IT department is being interviewed today, they are all wearing ties. I guess I'll have to pick out a nice tie for Monday.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

It looks like the IT department is being interviewed today, they are all wearing ties. I guess I'll have to pick out a nice tie for Monday.I'm sure I"ve seen you in one but I can't picture it.

[Moonliner]

/* Serious Mode On */

Do you want to follow the crowd on dress code or present a more individualistic image? What's the dress paradigm for the new company? Are they all white shirt blue tie stuffiness or more relaxed dress? Do you need to do a drive by of their offices and see what's what?

/* Serious Mode Off */

Ohh! Wear this one!

http://img.auctiva.com/imgdata/6/6/7/0/8/1/webimg/654103393_tp.jpg

[lizziebith]

I moved to Texas and dig it. I even have a horse named Mojo. :snap:

[€uroMeinke]

I'm ambivalent about the interview so will probably don standard corporate interview attire to keep things easy.

[Snowflake]

I'm ambivalent about the interview so will probably don standard corporate interview attire to keep things easy.

Oh damn, I was sexretly hoping you would go for the gold pants.

[Strangler Lewis]

Tough to say. In some situations,

casual (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2_Yi-1Ryf4)

works better than

less so. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nV7u1VBhWCE)

Good luck with the Bobs.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Office Space mojo.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Good luck with the Bobs.

VSLM

[Kevy Baby]

Oh damn, I was sexretly hoping you would go for the gold pants.Interesting typo.

Or was it a typo?

[Snowflake]

Interesting typo.

Or was it a typo?

My inner Lisa! Yeah, typo!

[€uroMeinke]

So 1st interview seemed to go allright. Now to have a phone interview with the person I would most likely work for. He's based in Princeton.

[Snowflake]

So 1st interview seemed to go allright. Now to have a phone interview with the person I would most likely work for. He's based in Princeton.

That would be cool! Good luck Euro!

Fares to Europe are so much better from there.....

[€uroMeinke]

I'm sure I"ve seen you in one but I can't picture it.

Interview Selfie

[€uroMeinke]

Well that's a big head

[Snowflake]

Well that's a big head

Object might appear larger ...

Very nice tie and shirt, btw. Snazzy!

[katiesue]

Very professional. But does that shirt go with the gold pants?

[Strangler Lewis]

What pants?

[Snowflake]

What pants?

Strangler Lewis wins!

[Moonliner]

Nicely trimmed nose hair. Well played.

[lashbear]

I thought Princeton was a character in Avenue Q.

[Moonliner]

I thought Princeton was a character in Avenue Q.

Princeton, New Jersey I would guess, although there is a Princeton in Texas and West Virginia.

It's on the bitter east coast, closer to me (3+ hours depending on traffic), farther from you.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Princeton could be fun!

[Cadaverous Pallor]

You look good all the time.

[Snowflake]

3 words, Princeton Record Exchange

[€uroMeinke]

yup New Jersey

[Strangler Lewis]

Details, please.

[Kevy Baby]

Details, please.Well, Princeton is a municipality with a borough form of government in Mercer County, New Jersey, United States, that was established on January 1, 2013, through the consolidation of the Borough of Princeton and Princeton Township. As of the 2010 United States Census, the borough's population was 28,572, reflecting the former township's population of 16,265, along with the 12,307 in the former borough.

[Alex]

I once drove through Princeton while lost, after dark.

I can report that the streetlights worked and have a dim memory of a wall along one of the roads. Hope that helps with decision making.

[RStar]

I wish you the best of luck, Chris.

[Morrigoon]

I once drove through Princeton while lost, after dark.

I can report that the streetlights worked and have a dim memory of a wall along one of the roads. Hope that helps with decision making.

:snap: :snap: :snap:

[Stan4dSteph]

So I got my Federally required 60-day Lay-off notice today. Monday I interview with the new company - let's see if I get an offer or a big check. Now counting down to March 4.That's a long notice window! Best of luck.

[3894]

Interview Selfie

Very GQ. Well played, EuroMeinke. Well played.

So, family and extended family objected vociferously to the plan to live well outside of Madison. They were Suzie Green and I was Larry David.

We are now back to Plan A: live in Madison.

We viewed a mid-century modern last Saturday. It was a little big - what do you do with an intact circa 1965 basement snack bar? http://img0.etsystatic.com/004/1/6030616/il_340x270.385958126_gkhl.jpg

I do think Tom would look great in a hostess apron, though. "Lime slushie with an extra maraschino cherry just the way you like it, Helen?"

Sadly, the windows throughout the house had never been replaced and need it badly. That's ... oh, $40,000.

So, we'll continue to view midcentury moderns in our preferred neighborhood in Madison.

Meantime, we're getting ready to sell our home of 22 years. No regrets but a whole lot of work. Painters start in early February, place gets listed when they're done.

[cirquelover]

I own that cookbook!

Good luck with house hunting and the house sale
.

[3894]

Good luck with house hunting and the house sale
.

Thanks, cirquelover.

We are not finding what we want. We are extending the search to Minneapolis/St. Paul. So two searches going on at the same time.

I actually feel happier about the Minneapolis possibility, rather than the Madison possibility.

We'll see.

[Ghoulish Delight]

I can recommend a surprisingly good pub in Minneapolis.

[Alex]

I can recommend a surprisingly good strip club caesar salad in Minneapolis. Assuming that nothing has changed since 2001.

The one and only time I ever went to a strip club without female companionship and I was literally the guy in the back eating and reading a book and mostly ignoring the nakedness. It confirmed for me that I'm not a strip club person (at least not without female companionship) but the salad was very good.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Minneapolis can be a tremendous amount of fun. My home city! :)

[RStar]

The dressing in a caesar salad at a strip club would make me quite nervous.




*Because of the raw eggs. Get your minds out of the gutter!*

[3894]

So, next time all of you are at a Minneapolis strip club and spot an old broad in the back eating a Caesar salad, come say hi!

[Strangler Lewis]

But Newark will still be around. (http://www.informationweek.com/software/social/facebook-predicts-princeton-wont-exist-in-2021-/d/d-id/1113573)

[Alex]

And I realize that I may not be able to recommend the strip club because I'm not sure I remember its name.

I want to say Gold Club, but that is also the name of the strip club three blocks from my office (that I've never been to) so don't know if I'm conflating them.

I used the world conflating in case anybody wants to try and stretch that into an innuendo.

[3894]

Aaaand we're back to moving to Madison.

Inventory is low until March when it should start to pick up. The high-inventory season is March-June.

That said, we're putting our house on the market in early March. The painters come next week to glam it up a little on the inside.

I really hate the whole process of all of it.

[Snowflake]

Aaaand we're back to moving to Madison.

Inventory is low until March when it should start to pick up. The high-inventory season is March-June.

That said, we're putting our house on the market in early March. The painters come next week to glam it up a little on the inside.

I really hate the whole process of all of it.

Good luck! I hope you find the swankiest digs in town, just you being there will up the swankiness of it all!

[alphabassettgrrl]

I hope your move goes well! I hate moving, too, but sometimes it's necessary.

[Alex]

I really hate the whole process of all of it.

Set the current place on fire and become itinerants. I enjoyed it when it happened to me.

[3894]

Set the current place on fire and become itinerants. I enjoyed it when it happened to me.

Accelerants + Bic lighter + volunteer fire dept. that won't get here for at least 25 minutes + big trees all around...

Right now, that's sounds dreamy.

[€uroMeinke]

So it looks like I won't be relocating, but I may be starting up a job search soon. The new company will keep me around for 3 months to work through the transition and then I'll be on my own. At this point I've still have some options in the works so I'm not really worried but I'll check back in a couple months.

[Moonliner]

So it looks like I won't be relocating, but I may be starting up a job search soon. The new company will keep me around for 3 months to work through the transition and then I'll be on my own. At this point I've still have some options in the works so I'm not really worried but I'll check back in a couple months.

Houston is sad, they were fattening up a calf for your arrival.

[Snowflake]

So it looks like I won't be relocating, but I may be starting up a job search soon. The new company will keep me around for 3 months to work through the transition and then I'll be on my own. At this point I've still have some options in the works so I'm not really worried but I'll check back in a couple months.

Well, I'm glad you are not leaving LB, not just yet! I'll send good job mojo your way.

The bad thing is, no move means no hella grand fare well party.

[innerSpaceman]

It would have been a grand, but sad party. I'm glad the C-M's will not be moving, and wish the M guy of that equation best of deserved luck in the job search.

But, hey since the hyphenated initials of the Cone-Meinke couple are "CM," maybe it's a sign you should start the job search at Disney! :p

[Strangler Lewis]

So it looks like I won't be relocating, but I may be starting up a job search soon. The new company will keep me around for 3 months to work through the transition and then I'll be on my own. At this point I've still have some options in the works so I'm not really worried but I'll check back in a couple months.

Hopefully not totally on your own but with a big fond farewell check.

[katiesue]

Good luck in the job search!

[3894]

Wherever you land, they will be thanking their lucky stars to have found you, EuroMeinke cher ami. Here's to good things and good adventure ahead. :cheers:

On the Madison front, today we put in an offer on a sweet Craftsman bungalow. Seller has 48 hours to answer. Let's see if they're serious about selling.

[3894]

...And we have a place to live in Madison! Moving day will be third week of April.

So happy!

[alphabassettgrrl]

Hurray!!!

[cirquelover]

yeah to finding a new house!

[RStar]

That's great Helen!

:snap:

[3894]

Thanks, dolls!

Goodbye Petticoat Junction, hello Chinese/Greek/Italian/etc. takeout whenever I like!

[Strangler Lewis]

Congratulations.

And when you and the mister are ready for a new hobby . . . (http://www.shop.stevescurling.com/)

Full disclosure: I have no affiliation with this business.

[Snowflake]

Thanks, dolls!

Goodbye Petticoat Junction, hello Chinese/Greek/Italian/etc. takeout whenever I like!

Excellent! Congrats! Can you share pics of the charming bungalow?

[3894]

Excellent! Congrats! Can you share pics of the charming bungalow?

It's in a New Urbanism neighborhood: tiny yards, narrow streets, highly walkable, lots of greenspace. The houses are all "indigenous", meaning here Usonian, Craftsman, Prairie, Bungalow. An enormous change for us but it will be a good one.

http://www.dkolb.org/sprawlingplaces/images/fullsize/nu.sprawl.wi.14.jpg

http://662.mlsimages.movoto.com/010/1704410_0.jpg

[katiesue]

When can we all come visit? I love it!

[3894]

When can we all come visit? I love it!

Thanks, katiesue. :cool:

We'll have a curling party!

[Moonliner]

Thanks, katiesue. :cool:

We'll have a curling party!

I watched curling during the Olympics. Looks easy. Count me in!

[3894]

I watched curling during the Olympics. Looks easy. Count me in!

BYOB Bring your own broom!

[Alex]

Party like it is 1998 and bicker over whether the purity of straw brooms or the modernity of artificial fiber brooms is acceptable.

[Snowflake]

Wow! Stunning!!!!!! Thanks for sharing

[Kevy Baby]

It's in a New Urbanism neighborhood: tiny yards...Or, as they are referred to in Southern California, "Spacious Lawn"

[3894]

Or, as they are referred to in Southern California, "Spacious Lawn"

Yeah, for what these houses cost here, in Palo Alto you can get Sears to put up a toolshed.

If you can get the building permit.

[alphabassettgrrl]

Looks like a great neighborhood!

[Stan4dSteph]

...And we have a place to live in Madison! Moving day will be third week of April.

So happy!Congratulations!