Ok girls..would this tick you off?

[Baileykat]

Here's the dealio...

I get out of the shower this morning...open the door and am greeted by my family, all bearing gifts screaming "Happy Birthday Mom".

Of course..this is lovely! Except...my birthday is TOMORROW!

Then my "beloved" (we'll use that term loosely) begins to "semi" argue with me over what day it is...("It's the 13th today...I have it on my calendar!" he says :rolleyes: )

Of course when I "semi" politely tell him it's only the 12th...then "reassure" him that NO my birthday is NOT on the 12th...never has been..he gets ticked off and leaves without saying bye to me~

Of course I open the gifts...(new CD's, chocolates from Rocky Mountain Choc Factory, Starbucks gift card and these totally cool, retro looking Disney prints from all the classics)

So..would you be mad, or blow it off, thankful that he remembered at all?


I can't decide...I'm a little hurt...I mean...what will happen tomorrow...Birthday's are always extra special to me...

Of course I've soothed his hurt manly ego..telling him it was fine...but my ego's a bit hurt too! :(

[SusieP.]

My strategy is to s-t-r-e-t-c-h my birthday out to last for about 2 weeks, so I say take it today and chalk it up to your family's enthusiasm for giving you gifts, which is a good thing. (Then you can milk it for a few days after!)

You know how hard it is for kids to have a present and not give it right away, and it sounds like you got cool stuff, so they were probably all so excited that they weren't paying attention. You gotta love that, and maybe they'll try to surprise you again tomorrow as well.

[Baileykat]

Thanks Susie! I'm trying really really hard not to be bummed!

Thinking more in terms of "Birthday Week"..instead of day!

[Claire]

Ooooh, you can use your new Starbucks card for that new drinky tomorrow. :D

Okay.....I'd be upset, but only because he got poopy and wouldn't say goodbye to you. It's not right for HIM to get upset....it's your birthday. Initially, I'd be a bit put off, but um, I get over things when presents are involved. ;)

I say he owes you another birthday. Presents and all (bwahahaha!). And a MAJOR apology. He got you awesome stuff, pulled off a surprise (I usually know what I'm getting ahead of time, because my husband is a bigger kid than my kids), and obviously put some thought into you. He just messed up on the day, and like all guys.....decided to act like an ass instead of apologize. :rolleyes: Why is it SO hard for boys to apologize? Ugh. Stupid pride and egos!!! Mamas, teach your sons to apologize to girls!! It's SO much easier in the long run!

[MouseWife]

I agree with two points of Claires' and Susies.

First off, yep, remind everyone tomorrow is your real birthday do what are they going to do? Maybe you should tell them that since it is your birthday and they gave you this lovely surprise you want to surprise them and then you choose something you want to do and say it is all for them. :D

And secondly, yep, I don't think it is fair he got mad at you. That is poopy. But, like Claire said, boys are hard to apologize. Especially when he put so much into it. He can't admit he had the freakin day wrong!! He thought he had it perfect. To admit he had the day wrong {you can laugh about this the day after tomorrow or tomorrow while you are celebrating again} is something he can't grasp.

But, on the other hand~

A very very {early} Happy Birthday!!!!

[~MS~]

mmmmmm Happy pre birthday? I mean there are belated b/d cards but 'pre birthday cards?'

I'd agree with Claire and Mousewife....he's just angry that all his hard work was "ruined" so he had to be a poophead....but it'll all be ok...you got some cool gifts :)

[Baileykat]

Thank's ladies! Mojo love for all of you!!! :)

Of course presents did soothe the hurt a bit!

And I honestly can't say I wasn't surprised!

I totally agree that "makeup presents" tomorrow will make everything ok again! :D



PS~ He did "sorta" appologize a little while ago on the phone...only for messing the date up...not for being such a poo poo head! :rolleyes: :cool:

[SacTown Chronic]

I'll side with the man here.


It wouldn't have hurt you to quietly let him be wrong and enjoy the thoughtful work he put into your (un)birthday.


And though I think that he was a butthead to storm off without a goodbye on your (un)birthday, I understand that he was probably hurt by your actions and more than a little embarrassed that he got the date wrong.

You owe each other a (sexy) apology. Dig?

[Claire]

It wouldn't have hurt you to quietly let him be wrong and enjoy the thoughtful work he put into your (un)birthday.


That's all well and good in hindsight....but when she points out that it's not actually her birthday (which would be pretty much anyone's reaction), and the man becomes argumentative and poopy....he owes the apology, not her. Not for getting the date wrong, but for being a poopyhead.

And he'd better bring you home some Starbucks. That's all I gotta say. :D That's all it takes around here. He gets sex, I get a latte.

~Claire

[MouseWife]

SacTown~ she said she was nice and polite.

Can you tell me, really, from a mans point of view, you really wouldn't want to be told? I mean, if it were your birthday, would you just blow it off?

It sounds like she was gracious. I think she is complaining to us, not really to him.

Also, after how many years do you lose the gift of having the date wrong?

Ah, how about a sexy apology during an overnighter? ;)

[Baileykat]

Of course I didn't complain to him...I was over and beyond myself telling him it was OK!

I know he went out of his way to get gifts...gosh..they were even in color coordinated gift bags! I was impressed!

And he got the bases covered...chocolate, music, disney, Starbucks!

I was just sending out the "I need good vibes from my sisters" thread!

SC...he's still a good guy! I love him dearly and trust me...I was appologizing more than he was this morning. BUT...I still expect some sort of makeup present for this! :D

[MouseWife]

Exactly, Baileykat.

I treat the Hubster like I do the kids. Well, when it comes to his feelings. He is a big kid. My nickname for him is 'Peter Pan'. {amongst others I can't post...} I would never want to crush him.

BUT I do know it is nice to get validation that our feelings count, too.

[invader pearl]

Does anyone remember the episodes of I Love Lucy where she'd trick Ricky into thinking it was her birthday so many times that she forgot it herself? Well, not to sound manipulative or anything, but you could do that. I mean, say, "Thanks for the gift honey." And then the next day, remind him that it's your birthday. Then when he says he's already given you a gift, say you thought that was a simple "I love you" type thing. ;)

Interestingly enough, I think I'd be the person to forget what day is someone's birthday. I have a habit of staunchly reminding myself days before the event, and then when it actually comes, I totally forget.

[dsnylndmom]

I agree with Claire and Mousewife BUT I think you should be treated to a nice dinner TONIGHT and TOMORROW NIGHT :p

[SacTown Chronic]

SacTown~ she said she was nice and polite.

Can you tell me, really, from a mans point of view, you really wouldn't want to be told? I mean, if it were your birthday, would you just blow it off?

Yes I would like to be corrected on the date....later on.


I would never, ever, bring down Crystal's warm and fuzzy groove of showing me her love by pointing out the fact that she was a day off -- not during the "surprise" and showering with gifts portion of the day.

But I would set her straight. Perhaps later that evening or the next day (you know, my real birthday).

That said, I would be hurt that she got the date wrong after all these years.

[Gemini Cricket]

I agree with Claire and Mousewife BUT I think you should be treated to a nice dinner TONIGHT and TOMORROW NIGHT :p
I agree with this. Pre-Birthday Dinner and a True Birthday Dinner.
:)

I think your husband was really embarassed and tried to supress that by arguing about things. If I were him, I'd bring you flowers tonight. Before dinner out.

[Grumpy4]

Maybe he was just being all poopy because he wanted to throw off the scent of something BIGGER he's doing tomorrow ;) . I agree with everyone! Work it to your advantage, celebrate it as long as you can, give a teeny break that he at least didn't forget your brithday, just got the date wrong. Maybe he thought it was Thursday and not Wed. I do that all the time.

But LIVE IT UP GIRL!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY (tomorrow) AND HAVE A LATTE ON HIM!!

[Mousey Girl]

You have every right to be miffed.

My B-day is Sept 10th, followed by my mil (who doesn't like me) on the 11th. I went to work that day, kept thinking, "why didn't HE call and say Happy B-day?" That was all I wanted, him to say, "Happy B-day." O didn't care about presents or anything, just wanted to hear those words. All day went by. Some friends were meeting me at Chuy's after work. I called HIM on the way home, he was at his friend's house. I asked him if he was on his way home, he said no. I then said,"Ok, well I am on my way to pickup The Boy and then going to Chuy's for my B-day with my friends." ... Dead silence on the other end of the phone ...
"Your B-day is tomorrow."
"Ummm no, it is today, your MOTHER's is tomorrow."
He places his friend's wife on the phone, "Your B-day is tomorrow."
"Ummm..no it is today."
"No, tomorrow."
"I ought to when I was born since I was THERE."

I then had to go to work the next day with a hangover since he had already arranged to send me flowers on what he thought was my B-day.

I can't get too upset though, I keep forgetting our anniversary.

[Grumpy4]

OOO, that's not so good MG. But you got to milk it I say!! I would be pissed at that then!

Baileykat-A day earlier is better that a day late.

Still MILK IT!

[Kim]

First off: Pre happy birthday wishes to you baileykat.

Second: I think I'd feel a little of all of those emotions. Thrilled with the surprise, a little hurt that he messed up the date, and really pissed that he got upset with me because he got the date wrong. He probably just got embarassed or was upset with himself and you happened to be the easy target. He'll probably apologize once he thinks it through. And when that happens, remember to MILK IT BABY!!!!!!! For all it's worth............ :D

[Gemini Cricket]

And when that happens, remember to MILK IT BABY!!!!!!! For all it's worth............ :D
Initially, I was thinking that same thought. But then I remembered when I forgot our anniversary once. He came home with flowers and I was sitting on the couch playing 'Kingdom Hearts'. I felt like such an oaf. But, he didn't hang it over my head and, in fact, we joke about it now. Hopefully, someday baileykat's pre-birthday will be something they can laugh at instead of being a sore spot.
I say graciously make dinner plans with him paying the tab and then leave it at that.
:)

(But, I do hear what you're saying, Kim. Some guys act like they deserve that.) :)

[Not Afraid]

I think my first thought would be embarassment - for him and the kids and, also, myself because it wouldn't know how to tell him.

I think I'd tell him quietly and then say I appreciate the thought - even if it was the wrong day. I'd also probably joke that I couldn't WAIT to see what he had planned for tomorrow. ;)

No matter what, its a difficult situation.

[Gemini Cricket]

I'd also probably joke that I couldn't WAIT to see what he had planned for tomorrow. ;)

Yeah, say that. Good one. :)

[Kim]

Initially, I was thinking that same thought. But then I remembered when I forgot our anniversary once. He came home with flowers and I was sitting on the couch playing 'Kingdom Hearts'. I felt like such an oaf. But, he didn't hang it over my head and, in fact, we joke about it now. Hopefully, someday baileykat's pre-birthday will be something they can laugh at instead of being a sore spot.
I say graciously make dinner plans with him paying the tab and then leave it at that.
:)

(But, I do hear what you're saying, Kim. Some guys act like they deserve that.) :)


Y'know your way is probably the hepest :cool: . It will be a birthday to remember and joke about in the years to come. I don't think I'd be upset for the day being wrong....it was a great surprise. But what would have ticked me off is the response she got when she told him it was the wrong day. That's what I think he needs to apologize for.

And NA...very clever response.

[MouseWife]

Yes I would like to be corrected on the date....later on.


I would never, ever, bring down Crystal's warm and fuzzy groove of showing me her love by pointing out the fact that she was a day off -- not during the "surprise" and showering with gifts portion of the day.

But I would set her straight. Perhaps later that evening or the next day (you know, my real birthday).

That said, I would be hurt that she got the date wrong after all these years.

Well you are too gosh darned sweet. ;) But really, yeah, it would sort of be a little juicy to wait and tell him later. :D

I think, on another hand, {so many hands!} that, as a mom, we do correct. I mean, I think the kids learned a lesson this morning~everyone makes mistakes. I think it is up to Dad now to show that he can get over it and laugh. You know what I mean?

If these were teenagers they would be teasing the hell out of him but these are kids looking to him for guidance on how to react.

I tell you, I have always admitted to the kids when I've screwed up. No matter how many times. :rolleyes:

No walking on eggshells in this house. No sir. Everyone makes mistakes.

[Ghoulish Delight]

No walking on eggshells in this house. No sir. Everyone makes mistakes.Yeah, but there's a difference between calling someone on their mistakes and shoving it in their face. If something like this happened to me, I'd probably roll my eyes a little and laugh. Now, if I did that, and THEN CP proceeded to argue with me about what day was right, I'd start getting upset.

[Baileykat]

You guys are good! :cool:

I actually thought later that I should have waited to tell him it wasn't today...maybe not in front of the kids....BUT...they knew it was tomorrow...I think they were just playing along!

Kat actually said "Dad got me up so early...I couldn't focus and forgot that it wasn't tomorrow yet!" She's so sweet!

I totally love the idea of "maybe something bigger is coming...." hmmm...I'll have to ponder that for awhile!!!

I've almost forgiven him...except for the fact that two years ago...he forgot the anniversary! But we won't go there! :mad:


And thanks for all the PRE birthday wishes....

You know...I was just thinking...I could play this into a yearly thing!

"Well LAST year, I got presents on two days...what about this year?"

Could work in my favor.... :D

[Baileykat]

Yeah, but there's a difference between calling someone on their mistakes and shoving it in their face. If something like this happened to me, I'd probably roll my eyes a little and laugh. Now, if I did that, and THEN CP proceeded to argue with me about what day was right, I'd start getting upset.



For the record...I was really really really nice about the whole thing! I knew he was embarassed and didn't want to ruin it for the kids....Now that I think about it ...they all looked so cute, standing there with presents, while I was dripping wet in my towel!!


:o

[MouseWife]

Yeah, but there's a difference between calling someone on their mistakes and shoving it in their face. If something like this happened to me, I'd probably roll my eyes a little and laugh. Now, if I did that, and THEN CP proceeded to argue with me about what day was right, I'd start getting upset.

Oh, yes, in this situation, boy, it is irritating to have someone try and convince you different something you know. To have someone tell you that you don't even know your birthday?

The 'eggshells' part was in reference to teaching the kids that everyone makes mistakes. And not to be afraid/nervous if they do something wrong. No one will get angry or think they are stupid. {again, maybe this is a job that moms just have?}. You know, have you ever seen a kid spill a drink and then freeze up with that 'Oh crap!' look? None of that.

Forget a birthday, be reminded, laugh it off, say you are sorry sweetie and
then carry on, maybe a little scorched but that it is all okay.

[UvaGirl]

It's your birthday here in NZ ~ celebrate it twice, I say!

[Baileykat]

There is the answer...he was going on New Zealand time! :) :rolleyes:

[MouseWife]

So funny. Wait, would it totally freak you out if they did the same exact thing tomorrow?? And then he tries to convince you that you are having deja vu?

By the way, how is your pre-birthday coming along? ;)

[tracilicious]

I think it is incredibly sweet that he planned that. Better a day early than late, right? My reaction without even thinking would be to say that it was tomorrow. I would be pissed that he stormed off, but not that he got the date wrong (unless he was a day late.) Claire's right, men are asses sometimes, but it sounds like you've got a sweet one.