Best Out of Office Auto Replies

[SzczerbiakManiac]

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

3. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from holiday on 4 April. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

4. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

5. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many people did this over and over).

6. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

7. I've run away to join a different circus.

8. I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Margaret' instead of 'Steve.'

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Heehee.

I love the little giveaways in there that reveal the British roots ;)

[SzczerbiakManiac]

I love the little giveaways in there that reveal the British roots ;)Did "holiday on 4 April" give it away?

[Not Afraid]

7. I've run away to join a different circus

This will be mine if I ever get a real job.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Did "holiday on 4 April" give it away?That was the big one. Add in "queuing" and "Margaret". :)

[Drince88]

That was the big one. Add in "queuing" and "Margaret". :)
Margaret is British??

[Prudence]

When I leave my current job, my husband has promised to fete me in the office with champagne, caviar, and mimes. I'd love to have the mimes answer my phone that last day.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Margaret is British??Much more common in the UK than here.

[Prudence]

Our department chair's name is Margaret, and just last year another department member named Margaret retired. We are nearly overrun with Margarets.

[Drince88]

And my mommy, too! (even if she is a Mary Margaret - she goes by Margaret)

But you're right, it's not normally that common of a name.

[Not Afraid]

But you're right, it's not normally that common of a name.

It is if you're Catholic. Irish Catholic, even more so. I know plenty of Margarets in the US but most go by Maggie now.

[Prudence]

That could be the common demoninator -- the retired faculty member named Margaret was once a nun and our department chairperson was once a Catholic schoolgirl (and the former nun was once her nun-teacher.)