Isn't 8 a Little Young

[Mousey Girl]

Dawn is doing her best to raise 3 kids on her own. Her son just turned 8 a couple weeks ago. His b-day was hard on all of us being his first b-day without his dad. David and I have been making an effort to be there more for the kids since Jimmy's family has taken a, "leave them alone and watch them crash and burn" approach.

We just got a phone call from Dawn. After she told me what had just happened I passed the phone to David. It seems Jr had just gotten out of the shower. Her oldest, J, who is a 15 yr old girl, went to check on the kids. Jr's bedroom door was wide open. She stuck her head in to find out why he was being so quiet. He was stark naked, on his bed, ummm...playing with himself. This was not the typical kiddy playing, but full on playing. This, of course, shocked J, who told her mom, who then called us. David now gets to have, "The Talk" with Jr.

It just seems that 8 is a little young. Nickolas is 9 and hasn't (to my knowledge) attempted this yet. When he was 2ish my mom was giving him a bath when he rubbed "down there" and exclaimed, "Gammy!!! Look how big it got!!" That was pretty much the extent of his explorations.

If Jr was your kid, how would you handle it?

[€uroMeinke]

If Jr was your kid, how would you handle it?

It seems he's handling it just fine

(sorry couldn't resist)

[Not Afraid]

Now, I don't have kids and only know adult males and their experiences, but isn't this normal? Some kids mature faster than others and their "plumbing" is active early on.

[€uroMeinke]

I think I was 5 or 6 when I discovered that certain things feel good, but it wasn't until I was about 10 or 11 before I got any - uh - results.

[sleepyjeff]

Scrathing me head wondering what everyone is talking about.





;)

[Ghoulish Delight]

8 is really early, but then, I've heard of girls who've gotten their periods that young.

Dunno if I have much to help you with. By that age, my parents had already brought me genearlly up to speed. Not that I really understood it until I too "got results" serveral years later.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Scrathing me head wondering what everyone is talking about.





;)
No, don't scratch. Rub.

[Not Afraid]

I love the euphamisims here. LOL!

[€uroMeinke]

Scrathing me head wondering what everyone is talking about.





;)

Erector sets of course

[Alex]

According to my human sexuality class in college it isn't particularly young at all.

I'd do nothing about it beyond explaining appropriateness and shutting the door.

[tracilicious]

I agree with Alex. I'd simply explain to him that it is normal, most guys do it, and that he should shut the door. I'd be extra careful about knocking too. Probably the more casual it can be, the better.

[Kevy Baby]

Don't introduce him to a Catholic Priest

[LSPoorEeyorick]

I did it first at age five. Of course it wasn't for another ten years that it fully worked. Early bloomers, late bloomers, everybody plays with what's underneath their bloomers eventually.

[Capt Jack]

I think I was 5 or 6 when I discovered that certain things feel good, but it wasn't until I was about 10 or 11 before I got any - uh - results.

yeah, that about says it

chances are another kid told him about 'it' and he was curious
no, I dont think its terribly unusual unless it becomes problematic/habitual

I dont think having a talk with him however is out of the question. even if only about the meaning of descretion

[Mousey Girl]

According to my human sexuality class in college it isn't particularly young at all.

I'd do nothing about it beyond explaining appropriateness and shutting the door.

I am pretty sure that is the approach David plans on taking. I know he also plans to tell the girls that they need to knock before entering Bubba's room.

[Gemini Cricket]

MG ~
8 is not too young. I was 7 or 8...
I say she should explain it to him. Tell him it's normal... Talk to him about chafing... (that can really hurt).
:)

[tracilicious]

Don't introduce him to a Catholic Priest


I'm sure Mousey Girl found a joke about a child she loves being molested very funny. Ha ha ha. :rolleyes:

[Mousey Girl]

I'm sure Mousey Girl found a joke about a child she loves being molested very funny. Ha ha ha. :rolleyes:

Nah, I tend to expect comments like that from Kevy. While a bit on the ewwy side, I know the spirit in which it was meant.

[SacTown Chronic]

Add me to the list of LoTers who gave it an occasional go before achieving any results as a youngster. I was quite startled the first time my efforts came to fruition. I felt like such a man that day. I remember wanting to brag but at that age you tend to keep things like that to yourself.

I was much older when I came to the realization that just about everyone on earth either does it or lies about not doing it.

[SacTown Chronic]

Here's a cautionary tale of how not to react:

My sister walks into her teenage son's room and catches him in the middle of winding his sun dial, dig? Yeah, she walks into a teenager's room without knocking. I'm thinking you get what you deserve if you open a teenage boy's closed door without knocking and see him stroking away. But my sister isn't of the same mind regarding privacy, I guess.

She proceeds to just humiliate the poor boy by calling him "dirty" and "sinful" and a bunch of other fvcked up words guaranteed to bring him shame whenever he thinks of it for, say, the next 60 years or so. I guess she figured the sheer embarrassment of being caught by your mom wasn't punishment enough.

Man, this happened almost ten years ago and I'm still pissed at her. Makes me wonder how often my nephew thinks of it and what goes through his mind when he does. Poor bastard.

[blueerica]

STC makes the most important point. Don't inadvertently cause him to be ashamed of the act. The repercussions of that could last a long long time. I remember things that were said to me (in a more hurtful vein), by my stepfather, and I think I carried them with my self image for far too long, in such tiny subtle ways bearing some sort of imaginary shame... Wow.

Choose (your words) wisely. I'm sure it'll all be just fine. :)

[innerSpaceman]

Hmmm, I started at about age 8 also. Let's see. Sac Town and € were late starters; Gemini Cricket and I were early starters. Hmmmm.


Might as well have David break the news to the kid that he's gay.

[SzczerbiakManiac]

I got a very early start too.

[Ghoulish Delight]

Hmm, we may be on to something...

[Not Afraid]

Let's ask NirvanaMan! ;)

[Scrooge McSam]

Grrr Always late to the party

12, first time, first results

[Not Afraid]

You went for the GOLD, man!

[Scrooge McSam]

It was a stellar day, as I recall ;)

[Alex]

I have no recollection of when I first did, but that was probably supplanted by the memories of actual sex when I was 14.

Why remember the hand when you can remember the real thing.

[€uroMeinke]

Hand?

[lashbear]

I was an early starter too.... - it's just like the old Gun story really... I was in the middle of cleaning it, and it just went off in my hand !

[lashbear]

BTW: he'll know better next time anyway - for most guys, the most sensitive part of their bodies during "Cleaning their pistols" is their ears.

[Mousey Girl]

LOL!! If he ends up being gay David and I will be the most understanding of his "family." Unfortunatly Dawn's and Jimmy's families are both homophobic rednecks. He also got an unhealthy dose of homophobia from Jimmy.

Jr spent the night with his grandparents. We were over at Dawn's for dindin and talked about it. The main thing is that J needs to learn to knock. At that point she exclaimed, "His door was wide open!" Nickolas just sort of took it all in. I kept waiting for the questions, but he never said a word. He knows what was going on, but he doesn't care.