Dear: [Archive] - Lounge of Tomorrow

tracilicious

07-08-2006, 06:03 PM

Arizona, stop sucking.

Dear Washington, stop trying to suck me in with your temperate weather and your constant job offers. It's not going to happen.

Dear Nutty Family, If you call me and I don't answer my cell phone, chances are I didn't hear it ring or was otherwise busy. If you keep calling, texting, paging, and leaving messages, I will assume you are crazy and avoid you like the plague for four days. I will not call you back more quickly because you are frantically trying to get ahold of me for no good reason.

Dear neighbors, please stop mowing your lawn more than we do. You're making us look bad.

Dear LoT, you rock. Don't change.

Dear baby, please stop pressing keys while I'm typing. It's annoying.

Dear politics, you are boring and pointless. Leave me alone already.

Dear readers, add your own "dear _____" in the following posts.

Prudence

07-08-2006, 07:56 PM

Dear tracilicious,

Come visit our temperate weather! There are many exciting job opportunities!

Love,

Citizens of Washington

Prudence

07-08-2006, 08:02 PM

Dear asswipe in the piece of sh!t pick-up behind me on the freeway, my car is not very tall and I know that you can see the gas tanker in front of me with the "flammable" placard prominently displayed. I have no interest in smashing my vehicle into the back of a gas tanker so that you can get to your destination some fraction of a second earlier. Please stop trying to climb into my truck. Shouldn't you be off fvcking small forest animals and shooting at beer bottles? Get your piece of crap conveyence off the freeway and find some place where civilized people don't have to look at your sorry in-bred excuse for a face.

No love,
Me.

Not Afraid

07-09-2006, 12:23 AM

Dear stoned asswipe driver:

If you drive 55 in the fast lane, the cops will know that something is wrong with you. Get a clue or get out of the fast lane.

Love,

70 mps.

DisneyFan25863

07-09-2006, 01:18 AM

Dear person who hit my brand new car,

If you run into someone in the parking lot, leaving a huge black smear across their front bumper, please leave your contact information.

Thank you,

Driver who must now pay $500 for a paint job and a new headlight cover thingy.

Motorboat Cruiser

07-09-2006, 01:44 AM

Dear MBC,

Please look next time before you place a 44 ounce beverage down on a coaster. Make sure that all of the cup is on the coaster so that it doesn't tip over and cause a waterfall of Diet Pepsi to cascade down from the coffee table.

Sincerely,
Your white carpet

wendybeth

07-09-2006, 10:54 AM

Dear Wendy,

Wtf were you thinking? How long did you think I was going to last with all you savages shedding and spilling and puking up furballs all over the place? I used to be a lovely shade of lightest sage- now I look like a Dalmatian with the flu. Piss off- I'm moving in with MBC.

Sincerely,
Your ex-carpet.

Gemini Cricket

07-09-2006, 11:49 AM

Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play
Dear Prudence, greet the brand new day
The sun is up, the sky is blue
It's beautiful and so are you

Dear Prudence won't you come out to play

Dear Prudence open up your eyes
Dear Prudence see the sunny skies
The wind is low the birds will sing
That you are part of everything
Dear Prudence won't you open up your eyes?

Look around around
Look around around around
Look around

Dear Prudence let me see you smile
Dear Prudence like a little child
The clouds will be a daisy chain
So let me see you smile again
Dear Prudence won't you let me see you smile?

Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play
Dear Prudence, greet the brand new day
The sun is up, the sky is blue
It's beautiful and so are you
Dear Prudence won't you come out and play

Look around around
Look around around around
Look around

We can work it out....

(Alanis song. I always think of this when I see Prudence's name & when I saw the title of this thread. :) )

Gemini Cricket

07-09-2006, 11:51 AM

Dear Mr. President
Come take a walk with me
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly

What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep
What do you feel when you look in the mirror
Are you proud

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held high
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why

Dear Mr. President
Were you a lonely boy
Are you a lonely boy
Are you a lonely boy
How can you say
No child is left behind
We're not dumb and we're not blind
They're all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell

What kind of father would take his own daughter's rights away
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held high
Can you even look me in the eye

Let me tell you bout hard work
Minimum wage with a baby on the way
Let me tell you bout hard work
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took them away
Let me tell you bout hard work
Building a bed out of a cardboard box
Let me tell you bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
You don't know nothing bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
Oh

How do you sleep at night
How do you walk with your head held high
Dear Mr. President
You'd never take a walk with me

Would You?

Freaky Tiki

07-09-2006, 01:17 PM

Dear Fellow Employees: Start sticking to the work schedule and asking for the days you need off. Stop relying on me to cover your shifts. I'm getting sick of working 7 in the morning to ten at night.

Dear Boss: Give me a raise, and start paying me overtime even though you technically don't have to because my hours are split among my three jobs in the same place.

CoasterMatt

07-09-2006, 01:34 PM

Dear GC:

You do know that's a cover of a Beatles song, right?

Gemini Cricket

07-09-2006, 01:36 PM

Dear GC:

You do know that's a cover of a Beatles song, right?
Dear CM,
I do now.
:)

Stan4dSteph

07-09-2006, 01:45 PM

Matterhorn Fan

07-09-2006, 01:54 PM

Dear refs,
Stop giving red cards for things you saw on a replay. That's cheating.

CoasterMatt

07-09-2006, 01:55 PM

Dear France,

Please dispose of Zidane in some horrible painful manner (but please, be sure to film such disposal).

scaeagles

07-09-2006, 02:39 PM

Dear body,

Please stop aging. You tire far much more easily than you did a few years ago and it is mentally disturbing. Even as I exercise you more, you have less and less stamina. No, viagara will not solve the problems I am referring to, for all you mean spirited readers of my letter.

SCAEagles

scaeagles

07-09-2006, 02:48 PM

Italy soccer

Thank you for showing the world that cheaters do in fact win. Your drama queen dives and hometown betting scandal have certain highlighted what outstanding people you are. You will be great role models for all of those aspiring divers moving up the ranks.

The game you play is not joga bonito.

Dear France,

Please dispose of Zidane in some horrible painful manner (but please, be sure to film such disposal).

After watching the dives, crying, shenanigans, cheating, whining, and downright brutality, particularly on the video I saw of Zidane, it is no wonder soccer fans riot. While I am often disgusted by the attitudes of US professional athletes, I can't recall seeing anything like that Zidane thing, and the overall mentality of international soccer players is worse.

wendybeth

07-09-2006, 03:02 PM

Stan4dSteph

07-09-2006, 03:13 PM

After watching the dives, crying, shenanigans, cheating, whining, and downright brutality, particularly on the video I saw of Zidane, it is no wonder soccer fans riot. While I am often disgusted by the attitudes of US professional athletes, I can't recall seeing anything like that Zidane thing, and the overall mentality of international soccer players is worse.To derail further, I honestly don't blame Zidane for what he did. It wasn't a good move, but the fact that he was ejected for it is, as MF stated above, total BS.

Dear wireless internet provider, Why do you suck? I want to shop Target online.

Dear rain, go away. Come again another day. I want to go for a walk.

scaeagles

07-09-2006, 03:16 PM

To derail further, I honestly don't blame Zidane for what he did.

In continuing with such derail, may I inquire as to why you do not blame him? As a coach of HS athletics, I don't care what someone is doing to you. You simply don't respond that way. Any kid who did that with me wouldn't see time the rest of the season, and this guy is an adult.

Stan4dSteph

07-09-2006, 03:26 PM

In continuing with such derail, may I inquire as to why you do not blame him? As a coach of HS athletics, I don't care what someone is doing to you. You simply don't respond that way. Any kid who did that with me wouldn't see time the rest of the season, and this guy is an adult.Start a new thread. Did you watch the game? Did you watch the whole tournament?

JWBear

07-09-2006, 03:31 PM

Dear Fresno,

Please turn the heat down a little. 104 degrees - I'm melting here. (Thank the Goddess for AC!)

Thank you,
A traveller who isn't out exploring your lovely city for fear of spontaneous Combustion.

Gemini Cricket

07-09-2006, 03:31 PM

Dear Disney,

Yes, your sequel did well. That does not mean we want to see 'Cinderella 3'...

Sincerely,
Me

Not Afraid

07-09-2006, 06:19 PM

Dear people NOT in Anaheim at the moment....we all miss you.

Love,

26 Lotters

Moonliner

07-09-2006, 06:24 PM

Dear people IN Anaheim.

We miss you too.

Sincerely, those not in Anaheim.

scaeagles

07-09-2006, 06:29 PM

Dear NA,

Why are you posting instead of being at DL with the visitors?

SCA

CoasterMatt

07-09-2006, 06:37 PM

Dear people at DL,

My aim is improving rapidly... :evil:

Stan4dSteph

07-09-2006, 06:44 PM

Dear people in Anaheim,

Oh yeah? Well, I am watching TV!

Signed,
Stuck in Smallbany

Kevy Baby

07-09-2006, 10:13 PM

Dear NA,

Why are you posting instead of being at DL with the visitors?

SCADear Scay-guls

She WAS with the visitors - hanging out in the AP lounge listening to Jimmy the Storyteller

wendybeth

07-09-2006, 10:39 PM

Dear people NOT in Anaheim at the moment....we all miss you.

Love,

26 Lotters

Dear LoT'ers who thought of us in the midst of your Swanking:

Thank you- we really miss you all, too, and were very sad to not be there.:(

Hope it was fun!:cheers:
Wendy, the out-of-towner

Motorboat Cruiser

07-10-2006, 12:50 AM

Dear Wendybeth,

Sorry we left you alone to babysit the conservatives today. Hope they weren't too much trouble. ;)

Sincerely,
The liberal Lot

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 06:40 AM

Dear Mr. Burns,
I'm so glad you enjoyed my son’s blood, and your card was just great! In case you can't tell, I'm being sarcastic! YOU STINK! You are a senile, bucktoothed, old mummy, with boney girl arms, and you smell like an Elephant's butt!
Homer Simpson

Stan4dSteph

07-10-2006, 06:51 AM

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 07:02 AM

Dear GC,
Let your happy side win more often.
Signed,
GC

Ponine

07-10-2006, 08:26 AM

IT people,

Why is the timesheet web app still not working on Monday? I need to enter my hours and sign it so I can get paid. In addition, why do you never communicate when critical applications are down and how soon they will be fixed? Moreons!

Signed,
Case of the Mondays
Dear Stan4dSteph's IT people,
Maybe you should meet up with my IT people as our Time Admin Upgrade failed testing and was not implemented today as predecited.
There are people who need to get paid. Maybe, between all of you, we can make some progress.

Signed,
Another case of the Mondays

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 08:36 AM

Dear Gemini Cricket,

Dear Prudence is a Beatles song.

Sincerely,
The 60's

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 08:37 AM

Dear Ghoulish Delight,

Please be kind enough to read entire threads before replying.

Thank you,
The LoT

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 08:41 AM

Dear Users,

It is never the fault of IT.

Signed,
An IT professional:)

Andrew

07-10-2006, 08:44 AM

Dear Landscape crew,

It's 8:45. Why aren't you here yet? I have to go to work.

Your pal,

Andrew

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 08:50 AM

Dear Gemini Cricket,

Dear Prudence is a Beatles song.

Sincerely,
The 60's
Dear GD,
Who are the Beatles?
Sincerely,
GC

:D

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 08:52 AM

Dear Users,

Did it ever occur to you that perhaps the IT department has a lot to do? Even though your problems are important, there is a good chance that there are also a million other problems that are important too. It is difficult to get everything done when everyone needs it because we are only one person. Also, it is not the IT departments job to help move your computer when you move your desk five times. Nor is it IT's job to fix the soda machine. Also, please stop glaring at me like, "you get paid way too much to not have my stuff done immediately." I also work a heck of a lot more hours and have a lifetime acquiring the specialized knowledge I use to complete a wide variety of functions that enable this office to run. You make $10/hour because you answer the phone. That's important too, but still, stop acting like you are my boss. You're not.

Signed,
Wife of an IT guy.

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 08:57 AM

Dear Indi,

Thanks for saying my eyes are like stars. That's the nicest compliment I've gotten in a while. Elaborating to say they are like planets and balls was a bit less flattering. Saying my nose is like cars and my mouth is like a glass of water...well, I'm just not sure what to think about that.

Love,
Mommy

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 08:59 AM

Dear Munchkin,

You're adoreable, and we love you. But if you scratch at the bedroom door at 5AM one more time, I'll have your balls cut off.

Love,
Sleepy

Ponine

07-10-2006, 09:03 AM

Dear Users,

.......
Signed,
Wife of an IT guy.
Dear IT Widow,
When it is just my problem, I do sympathize with IT and they get to me when they get to me.
When they are meant to do a system wide upgrade over a weekend, and tell EVERYONE to be ready on Monday, therefore no OT on the weekend... yeah well... I'm a little disgruntled. But I will live.
PS, the IT guys dont make enough for me to want the headache of their jobs.

Sincerely,
Payroll

€uroMeinke

07-10-2006, 09:08 AM

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 09:16 AM

Dear Sleepy,
I'm calling PETA.
Signed,
Leftie Wingnut
:D

Capt Jack

07-10-2006, 09:19 AM

Dear Users,

It is never the fault of IT.

Signed,
An IT professional:)

*highfive*

damn right....well, ok, SOMETIMES....its our fault. however 99 times out of 100, its because we actually listened to the users.

****

Dear God....

Whats up with the platypus anyway?

Ponine

07-10-2006, 09:22 AM

Dear Embarrassed Employee who should have made some coffee first,
I know how late you were up last night. I just wanted to make sure you were awake this morning.
~ The Toaster

Cadaverous Pallor

07-10-2006, 09:22 AM

Dear piece of paper:

How I love you so. So tasty, so chewy, and you make that fun rattly sound when I try dig at you. I'll be eternally grateful that my caretakers left you on the carpet for me to find.

I'm off to rattle the vertical blinds, back soon.

Love,
Munchykin

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 10:00 AM

Dear Ponine,

I hope it didn't seem like my post was a reply to your post. It was merely inspired by. I'm sure your IT guys are idiots. :p I should probably also mention that although my IT husband adores his job and everyone there worships him (except for a former secretary and a few pompous agents that think he is their personal slave), he doesn't make enough money for me to want his job either. ;) My post was purely for humor and not because I am disgruntled in any way with any users.

Sincerely,
Tracilicious

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 10:04 AM

Dear Laundry,
You are my b!tch. That is all.

Dear Husband,

You are amazing. How is it that in spite of that you have only once managed to give me a decent gift in five years of marriage? If you don't deliver this October on our anniversary, I swear I will burn every single one of your pancakes on every Sunday morning for the rest of your life.

Love,
Wifey

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 10:05 AM

Dear Munchykin,
If Glenn Close comes to visit daddy... run!

katiesue

07-10-2006, 10:05 AM

Dear Bus Driver from Mexico-

Although I realize that since you are a bus and carrying more than one person technically makes you qualify for the carpool lane, driving 45mph billiowing deisel fumes on the 800 cars stacked up behind you does not.

Please get the hell over.

Sincerely,
Road Rage Driver who now has potential lung cancer from all the exaust

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 10:06 AM

Dear wives everywhere,

The only gift you need is the honor of our presence.

Lovingly,
Husbands

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 10:07 AM

Dear Scaeagles,

Bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!! HAAHAHAHAHAAAA!! LOLOLOLOL!

Haha,
Wives

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 10:09 AM

Dear tracilicious,

See? The gift of laughter is a wonderful gift.

SCA

Ponine

07-10-2006, 10:13 AM

Dear Tracilicious,
Duly Noted.
However, I would have totally understood if you were disgruntled with the users.

~ Ponine.

Ps, hows my buddy the runaway cell phone?

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 10:15 AM

Dear wives everywhere,

The only gift you need is the honor of our presence.

Lovingly,
Husbands
Dear Barfbag,
Here's a deposit after reading Leo's post.
Signed,
Nauseous
:rolleyes: :D

Andrew

07-10-2006, 10:22 AM

Dear Landscape crew,

It's 8:45. Why aren't you here yet? I have to go to work.

Your pal,

Andrew
Dear Landscape people,

Even if today was a scheduled (or unscheduled) off day while you assemble materials off-site, it would have been nice to let me know beforehand rather than waiting until I called you.

Your somewhat annoyed, but still friendly pal,

Andrew

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 10:27 AM

Dear wives everywhere,

The only gift you need is the honor of our presence.

Lovingly,
Husbands

Dear husbands,

Would you like a BJ?

Sorry.

Sweetly,
the Wives.

Moonliner

07-10-2006, 10:32 AM

Dear Children:

I know that someday you will be the fearless leaders of the free world, but for today could you PLEASE just clean up your own messes without having to be repeatedly threatened.

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 10:34 AM

Dear moonliner,

Word.

SCA

SzczerbiakManiac

07-10-2006, 10:34 AM

Dear pregnant woman in the carpool line,

Having a bun in the oven does not qualify as an additional passenger—get the frell out of the diamond lane!

Signed,
All Freeway Drivers

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 10:36 AM

Dear SM,

I have never loved you. I only have eyes for GC.

Wally Szczerbiak

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 10:39 AM

Dear LoT,

Where did the words 'frell' and 'frelling' come from? I only see it here.

What the frell,
GC :)

Andrew

07-10-2006, 10:40 AM

Dear LoT,

Where did the words 'frell' and 'frelling' come from? I only see it here.

What the frell,
GC :)
Dear GC,

Wikipedia is your friend (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frell#F).

Your pal,

Andrew.

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 10:43 AM

Dear GC,

Wikipedia is your friend (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frell#F).

Your pal,

Andrew.
Andrew,

Oh, it's a 'Farscape' thang.

Signed,
Never saw 'Farscape' Ever GC

wendybeth

07-10-2006, 10:44 AM

Dear Scaeagles,

Middle- aged white guys are not allowed to use the word 'word' in the context that you did in your letter to Moonliner. Please refrain from doing so in the future.

Word to your momma-

Dr. Hakim Jones
Professor of Language- Ebonics Studies
Howard University

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 10:46 AM

Dr. Jones,

No more parachutes!

Signed,
Short Round

:D

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 10:48 AM

Dear Evolution,

Would it have been so difficult to allow humans to evolve needing merely 2 fewer hours of sleep? 2 hours is all I need for my days to feel long, productive, and fulfilling. If I could get by on 6 hours of sleep, everything would be awesome. But no, I've got to make do with a mere 16 hour waking day. Evolution, you've failed me again.

Yours,
GD

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 10:58 AM

Dear Pookie,

Your belly is adorable. Thank you for showing it to me repeadly this morning.

Love always,
Mommy,

Moonliner

07-10-2006, 11:01 AM

Ponine

07-10-2006, 11:13 AM

Capt Jack

07-10-2006, 11:14 AM

Wow.... he called Scaeagles middle-aged!

wurd :snap:

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 11:18 AM

That is a slight that did not go unnoticed on my end. However, sometimes the truth hurts. I'm almost 38, and I think the average male life span is 75.

Sigh.

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 11:21 AM

Hey, I was called "middle aged" in a magazine for Gods sakes. And this was said without knowing my real age (which may in fact BE middle aged, but I know I don't look my age.....or maybe I do.)

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 11:22 AM

How many posts does it take to derail a thread on LoT?

Moonliner

07-10-2006, 11:27 AM

Dear NA:

How long have you been calling Scaeagles "Pookie"?

Prudence

07-10-2006, 11:28 AM

Dear potential law review author:

Wikipedia is, indeed, a wonderful thing. However, it is not a reliable source you should cite as the one and only instance of support for the major premise in your article. If you can not find other support, your article sucks. One might even say that it per se sucks. I know I do. Take a reference class already, you ignorant slut.

No love,
Your R&T editor.

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 11:28 AM

Dear Moonie,

A very long time!

Love,

The secret's out.

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 11:29 AM

Dear Moonliner,

I think you are mistaken. She wasn't calling me Pookie. I know this because it wasn't my belly I was showing her this morning.

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 11:31 AM

Dear Leo,

Ohhh baby!

Swoon,

Lisa

SzczerbiakManiac

07-10-2006, 11:32 AM

Dear Mr. Cricket,

I have no idea who you are and if you do not stop impersonating me, I will be forced to contact my lawyers.

If they fail to persuade you, SM and I will personally pay you a visit and teach you some respect. Remember, individually, SM and I are both a lot bigger than you. Our combined efforts would be devastating.

Signed,
The Actual Wally Szczerbiak

Andrew

07-10-2006, 11:35 AM

Dear cow-orkers:

Isn't it wonderful that our small-but-growing-fast Silicon Valley start-up provides free snacks? Wouldn't it be even more wonderful if most of you didn't have the manners of two-year-olds and actually cleaned up after yourselves, and closed or sealed the packages of the aforementioned snacks after removing the bits you want to eat? While we're at it, wouldn't it be still wonderfuller if you could understand that the doubly-aforementioned snacks are here for oll to enjoy, not just you (and you know who you are), and for you to refrain from taking every single one of the FunSize™ Twix and KitKat bars as soon as they come in?

Your annoyed co-worker,

Andrew

Moonliner

07-10-2006, 11:35 AM

Dear LoT:

Anyone have an update on how our little Snowflake is doing?

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 11:51 AM

Ponine

07-10-2006, 11:56 AM

Dear Scaeagles,
(And anyone else who happens to be 37)
I dont know about you, but I am not ready to be called middle aged. I have a hard enough time convincing people of my age, esp that it stretches past 30.

Please speak for yourself. :p

(Though I understand your argument. How's about we just say the median age is 90?)

~Ponine

wendybeth

07-10-2006, 12:07 PM

Dear Zapppop,

Have you made preparations for the big day? Do you expect that it'll be a squeaker, or perhaps a silent one, or will that be a surprise even to you? Will you be using any performance enchancing substances, such as beans, egg salad, or chili?

I wish you luck in this, your latest venture.

Signed,
GD

Dear GD,

I have it on good authority that Zapppop is planning a 'run for the Border' in the very near future. I suspect this will greatly influence the outcome of his ......production. For the first time, I do not mind being in Spokane during a LoT event.

Yours, etc,
Wendy

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 12:17 PM

Dear Ponine,

I have it on good authority that the median age for women is 110.

Love,

9 more years.

katiesue

07-10-2006, 12:38 PM

Dear Telemarketer,

No I don't want to know anything about a dentist in my area. And since I've hung up on you, oh say 100 times in the last week perhaps you would get the point that I don't want to.

And to the automated recording that has been calling every line in my office for months saying "Oh I'm sorry I dialed the wrong number" what the freck is your purpose? You don't even try to sell me anything. You do nothing but annoy the crap out of me.

Signed,
Annoyed Assistant

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 12:42 PM

Capt Jack

07-10-2006, 12:48 PM

Dear Telemarketer...

Dear Annoyed Assistant,

Here, try this (https://www.donotcall.gov/default.aspx).

it has worked wonders as far as curbing the number of twits ringing my number for no reason. since marketers are now allowed to call cell numbers as well, costing you your hard earned minutes they've recently become even more annoying.

tell a friend.

yours truly,
Formerly Annoyed.

SzczerbiakManiac

07-10-2006, 12:57 PM

Dear GC,

I am relieved I won't have to get all Julie Brown on your ass again*.

As for sphincter-boy, you and I need to have a little chat! :mad:

Love,
SzczerbiakManiac

*I wish I could link to that thread. :D

scaeagles

07-10-2006, 01:03 PM

Dear SM,

That would be "His Sphincterness", thank you.

SCA

LSPoorEeyorick

07-10-2006, 01:18 PM

Dear overcritical people,

I know that whatever you most anticipated didn't live up to your expectations, but GEEZ! Can't you just let go and enjoy a good swashbuckle (onscreen or onboat) once in awhile?

Sincerely,
hypocritical especially during Oscar season

katiesue

07-10-2006, 01:20 PM

Dear Formerly Annoyed,

Your tactic works great at home but unfortunately you can't do it on business lines, which is where they are annoying me. At home I have caller ID and can avoid them (because apparently charities and political orgs are exempt so they can still drive you batty). Here at work we have no caller ID so I have to answer all the calls.

Thanks anyway.

Signed,
Still Annoyed

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 01:21 PM

Dear Irvine Spectrum,

I sincerely hope you got your money back for the installation of the parking space counting system in your new parking structures. This weekend, I saw a prime example of sloppy coding, one that strongly hints at a sloppy job overall. It should embarass you, and the company that provided the technology, to have a bright red sign displaying the message, "There are LOT FULL spaces available on level 2."

I, myself, am not a programmer. To be honest, I rather dislike the exercies of programming. However, in the course of my job, I do a small amount of pseudo coding (namely batch and shell scripting). I write small scripts for my own use, the results of which are rarely if ever viewed by anyone other than myself. And yet, I always find the time to add the 3 or 4 lines of code that enure that messages such as, "Test Run 1 Times" or, "There are a total of NO FILES FOUND files in the directory" never appear. It's the most basic of edge case/error handling, and to see it in a professionally installed system for public consumption is shocking. I would like the name of the vendor from whom you purchased the above mentioned system, so that I may star as far away from their products and services as possibled.

Sincerely,
A DVT Engineer.

tracilicious

07-10-2006, 03:06 PM

Dear in denial people,

Middle aged is between 40 and 60. Get over it.

Love,
She who won't mind aging

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 03:11 PM

Dear Traci,

Talk to me in 20 years and assure me you're still singing the same tune.

Love,

Me.

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 03:13 PM

Dear Beefy Goodness,

Yes. I will marry you.

Signed,

Subway Stalker.

Capt Jack

07-10-2006, 03:17 PM

technically, isnt middle aged the mid point between birth and death?

katiesue

07-10-2006, 03:26 PM

Dear Traci-

I am almost (three months shy) middle aged and I'm with you. Oh well. I would hate to be 19 again.

Singed,
The almost elderly and infirmed

Gemini Cricket

07-10-2006, 03:26 PM

technically, isnt middle aged the mid point between birth and death?
Yes. So, you really won't know when your middle aged years were until you are on your death bed. :D

Capt Jack

07-10-2006, 03:42 PM

Yes. So, you really won't know when your middle aged years were until you are on your death bed. :D

my point exactly :snap:

Matterhorn Fan

07-10-2006, 05:06 PM

Dear Peggy,

Would you please start giving people your new phone number? I've been getting calls for you for three years now and it's starting to get old.

Signed,
New Owner of Your Discarded Phone Number

BarTopDancer

07-10-2006, 06:05 PM

Dear paper - please write yourself
Dear LoT - I survived my first day of work and I think I'll go back tomorrow.

Cadaverous Pallor

07-10-2006, 07:25 PM

Dear LoT:

I miss you. I'm having withdrawals already. I just finished reading only 3 threads of the 20 I'd like to read and post on, and now realize my break is over.

Sadly,
CP :(

Stan4dSteph

07-10-2006, 07:46 PM

Dear Fire Department, Alarm Company, and Security:

I appreciate your readiness to save our warehouse from burning to the ground, but certainly there must be an easy way to call off the emergency response mechanism when one simply burns some toast.

Embarrassed Employee who should have made some coffee firstTo all employees:

Due to an incident today, we must institute a no-toaster policy. In addition, you may not have toaster ovens, hot-plates, propane torches, or flame-throwers.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Sincerely,
Management

Matterhorn Fan

07-10-2006, 07:48 PM

P.S. With the hotplates, so go the coffeemakers. You're on your own.

Sincerely,
Management

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 07:49 PM

P.P.S. MBC and SCAEgles will be promptly dismissed.

Matterhorn Fan

07-10-2006, 08:01 PM

Dear Online Store,
When you say I should receive an email confirmation of my order within one hour, that email had better be there after three hours have passed. I've never ordered from you before and cannot access any record of my order, even on your website. Did I really buy anything? You're making me nervous. (And no, it didn't go into the spam folder; I checked that just in case.)

Sincerely,
Person who may not order from you ever again

katiesue

07-10-2006, 08:06 PM

Dear KatieSue-

If you wern't such a disorganized slob you would be able to find the missing CD's you've been looking for for the last two hours.

Sincerely,
A Concerned Friend

Ghoulish Delight

07-10-2006, 08:54 PM

Dear Dumbass Commuters:

Please do not assume that just because the dumbass in front of you stopped at the freeway entrance meter light, even though the light was turned off, that you must as well. If the light is off, that means go. Thanks to the sheeplike stupidity of several dozen of you, it took 5 times as long to get onto the freeway than it should have.

Adding inslut to injury is the fact that today was the first day that the brand new second entrance lane, under construction for nearly a year, finally opened. What should have been the most effortless commute I've had in over a year instead made me late for work.

Idiots.

Sincerely,
Mr. Wheeler.

Motorboat Cruiser

07-10-2006, 08:57 PM

Dear MBC,

When I start beeping, that means my battery is running dangerously low and you should save your work.

Sincerely,
Your antiquated laptop.

PS: Sorry you weren't able to retrieve the updated story you had just spent the last 3 hours working on.

Argggggggghhhhhh!

BarTopDancer

07-10-2006, 09:03 PM

Dear cable company:

My modem is dead. When I tell you I already re-set it, powered it off 6 ways from Sunday you should believe me. I do know what I am talking about.

Thank you

DreadPirateRoberts

07-10-2006, 09:06 PM

Dear cable company:

My modem is dead. When I tell you I already re-set it, powered it off 6 ways from Sunday you should believe me. I do know what I am talking about.

Thank you

Dear Thank you,

Do you have a router as well as a modem? Probably a slim chance, but I've seen cases where a race condition will occur when the router and modem power up simultaneously.

DPR

Motorboat Cruiser

07-10-2006, 09:13 PM

Dear cable company:

My modem is dead. When I tell you I already re-set it, powered it off 6 ways from Sunday you should believe me. I do know what I am talking about.

Thank you

Dear BTD,

Thank you for your inquiry. We value your continued support.

We will be happy to help you with your problem. Many problems can be solved by simply rebooting your modem. Please try this first and see if it corrects your issue. Let us know if we can be of further assistance.

Sincerely,
Customer support

wendybeth

07-10-2006, 09:17 PM

Dear BTD,

Thank you for your inquiry. We value your continued support.

We will be happy to help you with your problem. Many problems can be solved by simply rebooting your modem. Please try this first and see if it corrects your issue. Let us know if we can be of further assistance.

Sincerely,
Customer support

(You forgot to add "Should it be necessary for a repairman to call at your residence, we will schedule the visit for between the hours of 8-5 PM, sometime next autumn." )

BarTopDancer

07-10-2006, 09:20 PM

Dear Thank you,

Do you have a router as well as a modem? Probably a slim chance, but I've seen cases where a race condition will occur when the router and modem power up simultaneously.

DPR

Ya. It was working just dandy until about a week ago then the router died (so said the cable company) so I bought a new one and everything works fine. Now I am trying to hook my TiVO up to my network and all heck broke loose, and while my network can aquire an address and I can get into my network wirelessly my modem is not showing any activity at all (and yes, it's on).

MBC, smack yourself upside the head for me :p

Motorboat Cruiser

07-10-2006, 09:20 PM

JWBear

07-10-2006, 09:25 PM

Dear Sanity,

Please hang on for a while longer. Only 4 more days and we'll be out of this charming little outpost of HELL.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Kevy Baby

07-10-2006, 10:38 PM

Dear Penthouse Forum

I never thought I would be writing you, but...

Kevy Baby

07-10-2006, 10:45 PM

Hey, I was called "middle aged" in a magazine for Gods sakes. And this was said without knowing my real age (which may in fact BE middle aged, but I know I don't look my age.....or maybe I do.)But you certainly don't ACT your age!

Not Afraid

07-10-2006, 10:48 PM

But you certainly don't ACT your age!

Thank GOD!

Kevy Baby

07-10-2006, 10:49 PM

technically, isnt middle aged the mid point between birth and death?Technically, middle age is when you start boinking the cute young assistant and driving a red Corvette.

It can occur many times in a life span.

JWBear

07-11-2006, 07:39 AM

Dear Katiesue,

Who is that tasty morsel pictured in your avatar? He looks familiar, but I can't place him.

Andrew

07-11-2006, 08:47 AM

Dear Katiesue,

Who is that tasty morsel pictured in your avatar? He looks familiar, but I can't place him.
I know who it is, but I'll let katiesue answer since you asked her.

Capt Jack

07-11-2006, 09:10 AM

Technically, middle age is when you start boinking the cute young assistant and driving a red Corvette.

oooooh...where do I get in line for that????? :D

wendybeth

07-11-2006, 09:25 AM

oooooh...where do I get in line for that????? :D

You're a male- you've been in that line since the day you were born.

Not Afraid

07-11-2006, 09:31 AM

Dear Catastrophe Waitress
Dear Catastrophe Waitress
I'm sorry that you seem to have the weight of the world
over you
I cherish your smile
There's a word of
peace on your lips
Say it, and with tenderness I'll
cherish you

Dear Catastrophe Girlfriend
Dear
Catastrophe Girlfriend
I'm sorry if he hit you with a
full can of Coke
It's no joke
Your face is
bleeding
You'll soon be leaving this town to the
clowns who worship
No one but themselves
No one but
themselves

Dear Catastrophe Waitress
Dear
Catastrophe Waitress
I'm sorry if the kids hold you in
cool disregard
I know it's hard
Stick to what you
know
You'll blow them all to the wall
When they
realise what you've been working for
You've been
working for
You've been working for

Capt Jack

07-11-2006, 09:34 AM

You're a male- you've been in that line since the day you were born.

Dear Wendybeth,
I have found myself once again standing in the wrong line.
If you would be so kind as to complete my order for the assistant, and the corvette (red would be preferred), I would greatly appreciate it.
If you are unable to accomodate my request, please assist me in finding the correct line.

CJ

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 09:38 AM

Dear Bicyclists,
Can you just decide if you're a pedestrian or a vehicle? Make up your mind and get off the sidewalk while I'm walking. And you don't give me enough room to get around you on the road while I'm driving. Use the bike lane, dorkus. And wear a helmet, butt cake.
Signed,
GC

Not Afraid

07-11-2006, 09:40 AM

Dear Mr. Sun,

Please go away.

Sincerely,

Way too hot in all of the wrong ways.

LSPoorEeyorick

07-11-2006, 09:44 AM

Dear people on the board I moderate:

You are not twelve years old. You know how to argue without calling someone a "puke" or a "f u c k i n g :p " and I have seen you do it. And if you DO call someone a "puke" or a "f u c k i n g :p " then don't piss and moan to me when somebody else calls you something equally distasteful.

Respectfully,
Annoyed Moderator

Dear high school,

I though I left you behind at the insurance company. Must you follow me everywhere I go?

Seriously, STOP FOLLOWING ME.
LSPE

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 09:51 AM

Dear LoT,
One of my favorite words is f u c k.
Signed,
GC Potty Mouth

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 09:56 AM

Dear Cellphone,
You keep telling me I have a voice mail and I really don't. Stop lying to me or I'll let Frodo eat you.
Signed,
One Cingular Sensation

wendybeth

07-11-2006, 10:00 AM

Dear Wendybeth,
I have found myself once again standing in the wrong line.
If you would be so kind as to complete my order for the assistant, and the corvette (red would be preferred), I would greatly appreciate it.
If you are unable to accomodate my request, please assist me in finding the correct line.

CJ

Dear Captain Jack,

Due to serious mistake on your part, the line you've requested is no longer accepting applicants. I hope you enjoy your new breast implants and tummy tuck.

Sincerely,
God

cc// Wendybeth

katiesue

07-11-2006, 10:03 AM

Dear Katiesue,

Who is that tasty morsel pictured in your avatar? He looks familiar, but I can't place him.

Dear JW Bear,

Michael Fassbender, plays Azazeal in the BBC America show Hex.

More here (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1055413/)

He's dreamy, especially for a fallen angel . Andrew got it right!

Sincerely,
KatieSue

Capt Jack

07-11-2006, 10:05 AM

SzczerbiakManiac

07-11-2006, 10:20 AM

Dear Mr. Sun,

Please go away.

Sincerely,

Way too hot in all of the wrong ways.I thought you could just make a call...?

wendybeth

07-11-2006, 10:26 AM

Dear God,

I'm so glad you called. Its good to see you're still around. I'd heard rumors to the contrary of late.

I however must take issue with the breast implants. While I am appreciative of the thought, I think if you check my records that was NOT the part I had requested augmentation of.

Please advise.

PS, the tummy tuck looks great.
Captain Jack,

While I appreciate that you are only human and occasional mistakes will be made, it's really not my fault that you find yourself in the wrong line. I am a very busy entity and don't have time to babysit- this is exactly the reason I gave you humans free will. How was I supposed to know you weren't going for the transgender option? Sheesh. As it stands, I am unable to comply with your request at this time. You may not realise this, but the Universe is a very fragile place where the slightest deviations from the design plans may have catastrophic results. Your desire to change lines so you can drive one of those little red death-traps would very likely disrupt the Space-Time Continuum and result in the complete destruction of Zyrtich, which as you know is the natural habitat of the endangered Spotted Triblit. Stop being so selfish.

To show I am not completely heartless, I will throw in a complimentary Botox session and fruit basket. Now, go away and stop bothering me.

Yours, etc,
God

Not Afraid

07-11-2006, 10:43 AM

I thought you could just make a call...?

THE DAMN LINE IS BUSY!

Moonliner

07-11-2006, 10:54 AM

Dear me...

Where does the time go?

Prudence

07-11-2006, 11:08 AM

Dear write-on competition entrant:

Your analysis is hands down the best of the bunch. And the way you seemlessly moved through all the provided materials without making it look like you were just checking them off the list - just amazing. Not to mention the way you handled cased cited to but not provided in the closed universe!

So please explain to me why you apparently didn't bother to PROOF READ your submission? Why do sentences conclude without punctuation? Why do nouns not match their verbs?

You're really making my evaluation job difficult.

No love,
Me.

scaeagles

07-11-2006, 11:11 AM

Dear Me,

Quit overanalyzing the job decision. Don't be a moron and take the damn thing.

SCA

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 11:17 AM

Dear SCA,
Take the job.
Your conscience

scaeagles

07-11-2006, 11:34 AM

Dear SCA,
Take the job.
Your conscience

This must be a fake. I know this because I have no conscience.

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 11:48 AM

I know this because I have no conscience.
Doy, you're a Republican.

:D

Moonliner

07-11-2006, 11:54 AM

This must be a fake. I know this because I have no conscience.

Dear Sca:

Take a coin, heads you take the job, tails you don't.

Toss it high in the air. Before it hits the ground you'll know which side you want it to land on. Take that option.

Gemini Cricket

07-11-2006, 11:56 AM

Dear LoT,
Yes. Yes, I do actually work. I'm just not very good at it.
:D
GC

scaeagles

07-11-2006, 12:10 PM

Doy, you're a Republican.

:D

I was wondering who would post that first.
:)

Matterhorn Fan

07-11-2006, 01:22 PM

Dear Online Store,
Thank you for making my order accessable on your website. However, that email you promised in one hour or less has still not arrived.

Dear Gmail,
Why, when I order things from online stores, do you not allow my confirmation emails through? Seriously, this is the second time this has happened. What gives?

And no, it's not in the spam folder. I already checked.

Signed,
Almost considering buying things in stores

JWBear

07-11-2006, 05:44 PM

Dear JW Bear,

Michael Fassbender, plays Azazeal in the BBC America show Hex.

More here (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1055413/)

He's dreamy, especially for a fallen angel . Andrew got it right!

Sincerely,
KatieSue
Dear KatieSue,

Thanks!

Brigitte

07-11-2006, 06:33 PM

Dear consistently late parents,

Once in a while I would like to not work until 7pm. I realize I do work at home and have my kids here with me, but there are times when I would love to get off earlier and get to go do something with them before 8pm. I realize I could change the hours that I am open, but that shouldn't be the issue when you get off at 3pm.

Sincerely,
Your faithful daycare provider

wendybeth

07-11-2006, 06:45 PM

(Charge them $1 a minute overtime, B).

And from one appreciative parent who was NEVER late::cheers:

BarTopDancer

07-11-2006, 09:48 PM

Dear teacher:

Please learn how to stop mumbling. And while you're at it, please learn to speak clearer English. I can barely understand you through your super thick accent. And stop being such a doodyhead control freak. The school policy on breaks is 15 minutes, not 10. Most teachers give us 20-30 and let us out early. Get a clue and don't hold us until the last possible moment just because you can. Here is a hint. A 4 hour class with one 15 minute break is a very long class, especialy when you cannot be understood.

Dear new job. I love you.

wendybeth

07-11-2006, 11:56 PM

.....Dear new job. I love you.

Dear BTD,

Yaaay! :cheers::D:cheers:

Wendy "It will all work out" La Gasse-Anderson

Name

07-12-2006, 12:18 AM

Dear ***hat hollyweird ****s,

Your idea of a rolling fast as a hunger strike is retarded.

Sincerely,

Name

scaeagles

07-12-2006, 05:29 AM

Dear new job. I love you.

Dear my new job, assuming you are my new job,

May I love you as well. I want to.

SCA

PS - Boo-ya, BTD!

Gemini Cricket

07-12-2006, 05:34 AM

Dear New Job Gods,
I need one now. I need to move on from this current one...
Signed,
GC

Capt Jack

07-12-2006, 08:02 AM

Dear weatherman,

I am sorely disappointed in your latest forecast. I thought we'd already discussed this topic at length and you had wisely decided against further such actions. The humid heat thing has got to go! Now you tell me theres more coming? Do you really WANT an a$$whoopin' that bad?

I would strongly advise you rethink your latest upcoming weather delivery. My operatives would prefer not to involve your family in this matter.

You have been warned.

Gemini Cricket

07-12-2006, 08:07 AM

GC,
After "Selecting All", don't confuse the following Gmail buttons in the Trash area of your email account: "Delete Forever" and "Move to Inbox".
Well, don't confuse them again....
Signed,
GC

My inbox has trash in it...

Ghoulish Delight

07-12-2006, 11:35 AM

Dear Brain,
Please start remembering things.

Love,
Umm...uh....

SzczerbiakManiac

07-12-2006, 12:56 PM

Dear most users of PA systems and drive-through order-takers,

Please take the gawd damned microphone out of your mouth and articulate your words clearly.

Signed,
The poor slobs trying to decipher what the hell you're saying.

Freaky Tiki

07-12-2006, 12:57 PM

Dear 20,000 Christian Music Festival People Invading My Town: Go Home.

P.S. Upon further investigation I'm changing it to "Dear Over 25000 Christian Music Festival People"

LSPoorEeyorick

07-12-2006, 02:05 PM

Dear makers of Realemon Lemon Juice,

The use of "real" and "lemon" used in proximity to your juice offends me. This afternoon, I used it in place of a juiced lemon for my parents' lemon viniagrette recipe. Then I poured it on my Living Trail Mix from Jazzy Sprouts for lunch.

I just want to say that Lemon Pledge or Lemon Pine Sol has more in common with lemon flavor that realemon does. And might taste slightly better.

When life gives you lemons, don't chemically "enhance" the lemonade.
Sincerely,
LSPE

Prudence

07-12-2006, 04:33 PM

Dear self-important busy-body patron in the microfilm section of Suzzallo library:

I realize that in the many years since my job was to locate and print out articles from microfilm for off-campus patrons I have lost some of my dexterity and it now takes me a whole second to line up the notch on the reel with the bump on the spindle.

However, I don't think that required you springing from your seat halfway down the bank of readers and racing over to shout at me "You must be doing something wrong!!!"

It definitely did not require a mini lecture (as I tried to ignore you) on what will happen if I load the reel improperly.

Your parting shot that I need to learn how to read the instructions was entirely uncalled for.

I successfully navigated the first two reels; what made you think that the third was going to go terribly, horribly wrong?

Was your Cream of Wheat extra lumpy this morning? Did hooligans steal your favorite seat on the bus? Perhaps some spry young thing refused to let you cut in line at the corner market?

Go back to your conspiracy research and leave me the hell alone.

No love,
Me.

Ghoulish Delight

07-14-2006, 10:53 AM

Dear Giovani Carrara,

First off, we appreciate all that you've done for the Dodgers. It really is amazing how you manage to elevate your game when playing for the Dodgers. You've pitched out of some tights spots as a reliever, and pitched well.

But what in God's name posessed you to throw that pitch to Jim Edmonds last night? Jim Edmonds hits pitches like that into the bleachers for a living, and he's been doing it for 13 years, so this can't be a surprise to you. You threw 8 pithces otuside, which is exactly where you should pitch to him in situations where he can hurt you. But pitch 9, you decide to get cute? With 2 outs, 1st base open, and a rookie who had already blown 2 bases loaded situations on deck? That's when you decide to try to come inside to Jim freaking Edmonds? Just walk him and work the rookie, you have nothing to prove. There's no shame in walking Jim Edmonds. If we were managing the team, you'd be fined for throwing that pitch.

- Sincerely,
Dodger fans everywhere

scaeagles

07-14-2006, 10:56 AM

Dear GD,

I don't know the situation, but is it possible he didn't throw the pitch there on purpose and it was a control issue rather than a decision to challenge him?

A non-baseball fan

Ghoulish Delight

07-14-2006, 10:57 AM

Dear GD,

I don't know the situation, but is it possible he didn't throw the pitch there on purpose and it was a control issue rather than a decision to challenge him?

A non-baseball fanNope, would have nailed the catcher's glove (had 24 or so ounces of wood not gotten in its way). He threw the pitch he wanted to.

Not Afraid

07-14-2006, 11:02 AM

Dear Floyd Landis.

You rock!

Love,
Adoring fan.

Dear Tour:

Thank you for being exciting - finally. It only took 11 stages, bit I'm willing to wait.

Love,

Not a Tour Posesur

Andrew

07-14-2006, 12:27 PM

Dear Allied Waste of San Mateo County,

Why do you have to be such obstinate bitches about everything? Isn't the sole reason for your existence to pick up trash and debris? How is it that, after we paid an outrageous $389 for you to drop off a 15 cu. yd. debris box in front of our house, you can't manage to pick it up on schedule a week later, and then when we call to find out (and have to leave a message because you don't answer your phones) we get a message back saying you don't have our address? Why do three separate groups of pick-up personnel (regular recycling, yard waste recycling, general trash) all refuse to take bagged yard waste? And why are you all so incredibly rude?

Sincerely,

The person who will be filing a complaint with your franchise authority as soon as I can figure out how.

scaeagles

07-14-2006, 12:46 PM

(I used to coach the kids of the Allied Waste CEO. He has since been forced out of that position, if I recall.)

katiesue

07-14-2006, 01:28 PM

Dear Federal Express,

Could your website run any slower?

Sincerely,
Still Waiting

Ghoulish Delight

07-14-2006, 01:51 PM

Dear Former Veteranary Clinic of choice:

I'm writing in regards to the debacle that was our attempt to get our rabbit, Munchkin, neutered this weekend. Thank you so much for the 6:40AM call to cancel today's appointemnt. Truly a wonderful way to start the morning.

Would it have killed you, however, to have checked the rabbit suregeon's work schedule a week ago, when my wife made the appointment? Or perhaps any of the days between a week ago and today? Like maybe yesterday, when you called to confirm the appointment. Is it really that hard to look at the schedule when taking appointments to see that the surgeon who knows how to perform the procedure won't be working the day of the appointment?

Here's what particularly concerns me. In the confirmation call yesterday, which I received on my answering machine, you instructed us to withold food from Munchkin starting at 10PM last night since he will be going under anesthesia. Now, I thought I had read that rabbits should NOT fast before surgery as the need for fasting arises from the risk of vomitting in cats and dogs, while rabbits do not vomit. In fact, it can be dangerous for rabbits to fast because it can cause they digestive system to shut down. But, I figured, you're the doctor, right?

After the call this morning, however, I'm kicking myself for not trusting my instincts. Clearly the receptionist who handled all this NEVER ACTUALLY TALKED TO THE DOCTOR! If she had, she'd know the doctor wasn't going to be working today. Most likely, she looked at the details of the procedure, saw "anesthetic", and went through her usual "make them fast" script for dogs and cats. And this from a clinic that claims to specialize in exotics, and who is recommended by pet rabbit societies! I confirmed my misgivings today with research from several different soucres that emphatically say not to fast a rabbit.

Due to the risk at which you put my beloved pet due to this lack of attention, I no longer feel comfortable coming to you for his care. And I may be contacting the rabbit societies that list you as a recommended clinic about this.

Sincerely,
Worried parents

[and yes, CP has already called and told them of our decission to switch, and why]

DreadPirateRoberts

07-14-2006, 01:56 PM

I'm writing in regards to the debacle that was our attempt to get our rabbit, Munchkin, neutered this weekend.

Dear GD/CP,

Why was I not included in this discussion? I have some thoughts on this issue that I would like to discuss with you.

Signed,

Munchkin

Matterhorn Fan

07-14-2006, 01:58 PM

Dear Worried Parents:
This sort of thing happens when the doctor is a family practitioner, too. My first attempt to find a doctor in this state went similarly. I showed up for a standard blood test and was met with "have you been fasting?" and a receptionist that looked insulted when I said "of course not." I know from years of experience that I did not need to fast (if only they'd told me to over the phone, I would've been able to save myself some time and a co-pay). I concluded this doctor was not worthy and I moved on. I should have moved on before even meeting the guy.
Sincerely,
Patient who doesn't blindly trust doctors

Not Afraid

07-14-2006, 02:24 PM

Dear Lottery,

Please deliver a winning tickt to my door. I need to have central air install immediately as well as some shade landscaping done - plus, I'll have to play my electricity bils. So, if you could take care of that ASAP, I would be forever grateful.

Sincerely,

Not happy being hot.

Not Afraid

07-14-2006, 02:29 PM

Dear Charles,

Must you always walk in front of me when I am trying to go somewhere in the house? I DO know my way around this place and I promise not to get lost.

Or, if you MUST lead me, please walk a tiny bit faster. ok?

Love,

Impatient Mommy.

scaeagles

07-14-2006, 02:49 PM

Dear LoT,

You guys all rock. Seriously. Health concerns, job issues, you're there. Good advice, funny as hell, intelligent, good peeps.

Affectionately,
Leo, scaeagles, skankles, shingles, skaygles, whatever you choose to call me

Prudence

07-14-2006, 02:56 PM

Dear Boris:

I shower (nearly) every morning. Have for years now. You've seen me do it. And I've survived every time.

I know that you're not fond of this sort of bathing, but I can't reach my bits with my tongue the way you can yours. I'll be fine. You don't need to attack me to save me from the shower. I like the shower.

love,
me.

Ghoulish Delight

07-14-2006, 03:03 PM

Dear Prudence:

I think you're just not trying hard enough. If you'd just start responding to my strict disciplinary methods of training, I think you'll find you can reach with your tongue whatever you'll put your mind to. Just think of the marketability should you succeed!

Respectfully,
Boris

Ponine

07-14-2006, 03:17 PM

Dear Worried Parents,
Yes please, trust those instincts.
Sometimes the receptionist at the counter doesnt know what they are talking about and the doctor doesnt care to tell them.
Find a doc whom you feel deserves a vacation fund. THey are out there.

Sincerely,
Best friend of a practicing vet who was told they should not be taking time educating patients families on how to properly care for their animals, therefore would not be offered permanancy at the clinic.

Not Afraid

07-14-2006, 03:25 PM

Dear Dad,

What with the new brand of turkey? I like the other one better.

Love, Pookie.

PS. Why has Lyra decided she like turnkey now? Can you make it stop?

€uroMeinke

07-14-2006, 03:44 PM

Dear Convoluted Performance Review Process:

How is it that once you were a one page form filled out by my boss indicating whether I met or didn't meet my job requirements, and now you are a 14 page monstrosity filled with vacuous repetative statements that I am forced to write, that even my boss will not read, and in the end will be entered into some automated tracking system as a one-digit numeric code indicating whether or not I met my job requirements?

Prudence

07-14-2006, 04:19 PM

Dear article author:

At the time you submitted your updated article, you had finished your second year of law school. And yet, you cited to the syllabus of a Supreme Court opinion, rather than the actual opinion. The syllabus, which clearly states: "The syllabus constitutes no part of the opinion of the Court but has been prepared by the Reporter of Decisions for the convenience of the reader." That means that you, the author, need to find the relevant parts of the actual opinion. You do not cite to the headnotes. I am doing way more work on this S&C than I should be.

I'm really wondering how it is that your article was selected. I'm glad the masthead won't specify which article I worked on.

No love,
Me.

No love

Mousey Girl

07-14-2006, 05:02 PM

Dear Idiots:

I am not stupid. I will not open a Wells Fargo checking account and act as your U.S. money person. I do not believe that I will be able to make money this way. I know that you are basically spamming me with a scam and that eventually someone WILL bite. This someone is not me.

From me.

ps. to the other idiots who keep emailing and calling, if I have to pay to work for you, I don't want to work for you.

Ghoulish Delight

07-14-2006, 07:06 PM

Dear Grumpy Coworker,

I suppose I understand that being your age, still working a pretty grunt job, AND the company is going through some pretty signifcant (and often stupid) restructuring gives you some good reason to be grumpy. So I will forgive you your daily grumbling, head shaking, and portents of doom. I will even forgive your buck-shot strategy of grousing about every single thing management proposes, causing valid complaints from the rational among us to get lost in the noise.

But damnit, would it kill you to just say, "Thank you," or "You too," when someone says, "Have a good weekend"? Are you really that joyless that the only response to the prospect of an enjoyable 2 days without work is, "Pfft, yeah right."? I mean, holy sh!t.

Signed,
Not yet broken spirit.

Mousey Girl

07-14-2006, 08:36 PM

Dear Mr Denny,

I know that your life is stressful. I know that on top of working for a bi-polar woman and every day with her is a new adventure, that you have a hectic homelife. Heck, you have 7 kids with 5 being todlers. The least you could have done is answer when I called you every day this week. YOU were the one who told me to call!! All you had to do was tell me that she wasn't ready to have me come back. I'm a big girl, I already figured that out. You didn't have to leave the room when I came in today. I wasn't there to cause a scene. All I was doing was picking up the remains of my stuff. I think it is time for you to grow up a bit.

~ Your former co-worker/underling

Freaky Tiki

07-15-2006, 01:27 PM

Dear Christian Music Festival People:

Hi...um it's me again. I really cannot stress to you how much I would like for you to go home. Really, I mean it. I have to work early in the morning, and I really don't appreciate having your crappy genre of music keeping me awake until midnight. I'll be honest if it was good music it'd be different, if you were playing a lullaby to put me to sleep, I'd actually be supporting your endeavor. And could you please explain to me why it needs to be so loud? I mean I support rock and/or roll, but let's be reasonable....if I can make out the lyrics to a song and I'm 3 miles away, isn't that a little overkill? Do you really find it productive to keep people in a 3 mile radius awake all night? I don't.

Motorboat Cruiser

07-15-2006, 01:39 PM

Dear Freaky Tiki,

Thank you for writing to us and expressing your interest in our music festival. We welcome your support and hope you to continue to enjoy the music we offer.

We would like you to consider becoming a premium member, for the low price of $119.95

(billed bi-weekly to your credit card. May not be cancelled at any time prior to rapture).

Becoming a Premium Member will allow you receive advanced notice for all of our upcoming concerts and special discounts on tickets (when purchased in quantities of 6 dozen or more).

Again, thank you for your support. We'll turn the volume up a little for you tonight to show our appreciation.

Sincerely,
Christian Music Festival

Freaky Tiki

07-15-2006, 01:44 PM

Damn you SonShine!!!!

Matterhorn Fan

07-19-2006, 03:29 PM

Dear Peggy:
Had I bothered to keep track of this information, I would now know: your full name, your address, what kind of dog you have, who his vet is, and when he needs shots, the make and model of your car, as well as when it is due for service, the name of your SO and the name of his proctologist, the name of someone you know who died, that you volunteer for market research studies for extra cash, your approximate age, and now, the latest tidbit from today's answering machine message, your occupation.

I would be scared if someone were getting this amount of information about me. People who call you leave TMI on the answering machine. I'm past annoyance and have since become amused at this, but come on. The proctologist?

It's been my number for years now. Enough is enough.

Eliza Hodgkins 1812

07-19-2006, 03:36 PM

Dear Amazon.com:

Please don't tell me a book is available, and that I can have it shipped to me in 2 days, getting my hopes up, if you're only going to send me a confirmation email that contradicts you, claiming that it won't even ship until after the 26th.

Love,
Eliza Hodgkins 1812

lashbear

07-19-2006, 07:27 PM

Dear Americans,

When are you going to sell the rights to LOST and SURVIVOR to Australian television stations, in order that they can have the program THE SAME WEEK as the Americans, and be able to read threads on chat boards in synchronicity.

Yours Lostfully,
Lashbear.

AND

Dear Channel 7,

Why the hell don't you play LOST and SURVIVOR in the same weeks as the Americans.

I hate hearing who won Survivor before I've watched it. I also hate hearing that Libby is dead before she dies even though I know it's my fault for reading the lost thread when I shouldn't have

Also, How come you can show ET episodes that give away who won Survivor even though you're showing episodes of the actual survivor show weeks behind. Yor all a pack of Poo Poo heds.

Yours behind,
Lashbear

tracilicious

07-19-2006, 08:02 PM

Dear Indi,

Thomas the Train is boring boring boring. I know we don't watch movies very often, but when we do, can it please be something Pixar? Or at least Disney? I don't have this huge collection for nothing. I mean, come on, the stupid train is barely even animated. I do like it when Alec Baldwin narates, though.

Love,
Mommy

Not Afraid

07-19-2006, 08:17 PM

Dear Kovacs.

Please don't die while Amy is watching you.

No, revise that.

Please don't die when ANY of us are taking care of you.

Love,

Your dog sitter (the one who pokes you with needles).

katiesue

07-19-2006, 08:28 PM

Dear child of mine,

A shower and washing your hair isn't considered cruelty under the Geneva Convention. Just shut up and go do it for gods sakes.

Love you, (well most of the time)
Mommy

BarTopDancer

07-19-2006, 08:39 PM

Dear CA,

Stop being so expensive.

Dear Apartments,

I realize that we pay a premium for living in Orange County, but don't you think it's a tiny bit unreasonable to charge $1200 for a 400sqft studio?

And while you're at it, for the prices you are charging it is not unreasonable to expect that the property will be maintained.

Signed,

A Prospective Renter

CoasterMatt

07-19-2006, 09:16 PM

Dear BTD,

Buy a mobile home :)

Prudence

07-19-2006, 09:22 PM

Dear Professor:

The world will not end if you let us out of class three minutes early. I know the ABA has attendence requirements, but I don't think they extend to making sure we never ever ever leave early. And if they did, I'm sure the numerous times you've kept us late will more than make up for the missing three minutes. You do not need to stand up there stammering and randomly throwing out unconnected factoids you don't plan to test us on just so our butts stay in chairs for 100 minutes. All this blathering about judicial discretion and you can't let us out three minutes early because we're out of material for the day? Get a life.

No love,
Me.

BarTopDancer

07-19-2006, 09:23 PM

Dear CoasterMatt,

I'd love too, but the land rental on top of the mortgage payment makes it way to expensive. :(

Andrew

07-19-2006, 09:41 PM

I realize that we pay a premium for living in Orange County, but don't you think it's a tiny bit unreasonable to charge $1200 for a 400sqft studio?
Dear BTD,

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/cgi-bin/search?areaID=1&query=&catAbbreviation=apa&subAreaID=1&group=H&maxAsk=1200&addTwo=purrr ;)

BarTopDancer

07-19-2006, 09:46 PM

Dear Andrew,

New company does not have an office there. They do however have one in TX. mmm cowboys. And the SF area is about as expensive as OC. So :p

Andrew

07-19-2006, 10:21 PM

New company does not have an office there.
A tech company without Bay Area offices? :eek:
And the SF area is about as expensive as OC. So :p
That may be, but in SF everything is within walking distance. And if it's not, we have actual working mass transit.

BarTopDancer

07-20-2006, 07:21 AM

A tech company without Bay Area offices? :eek:

It's not a tech company. That was old job. :p

SzczerbiakManiac

07-20-2006, 03:29 PM

tracilicious

07-20-2006, 03:31 PM

Dear Little Brother,

I grow weary of hearing of your constant break ups with your girlfriend. No one that young should be that chronically unhappy. Do yourself (and me) a favor and stay broken up this time. Travel!

Love,
Your sister

SacTown Chronic

07-20-2006, 03:35 PM

Dear SzczerbiakManiac,

The next time you fill up your water bottle at the cooler, be sure to screw the cap back on ALL the way, not just half-way, before you tilt it back for a swig. Your shirt and pants will stay dryer that way.

Thanks,
Your Wet Clothes
Dear Time Machine,

Activate.

Thanks,
STC

7 years ago.....

Dear Cat,

Screw the tobasco cap back on -- don't just set the cap on the bottle. If you do this then daddy won't accidentally squirt tobasco sauce in your eye when he shakes the bottle.

Love,
Dad (who always felt guilty even though it wasn't his fault AT ALL)

Not Afraid

07-20-2006, 03:35 PM

Dear doggie mom.

Plese call me BEFORE you give your dog that double dose of insulin, not AFTERWARDS.

Sincerely,

The pet sitter you schedule to dose your dog at 7 pm.

LSPoorEeyorick

07-20-2006, 03:51 PM

Dear Cat,

You liked Tabasco when you were... what were you seven years ago, like, six? You were a brave little Sactownlet. I don't eat Tabasco and I'm 27 years old.

Cheers,
LSPE

SacTown Chronic

07-20-2006, 03:56 PM

Dear LSPE,

Oh yes. Tobasco, jalapenos, salsa on everything. You name it - if it's hot - she probably likes it. Always has.

Love,
Cat's dad

BarTopDancer

07-20-2006, 04:32 PM

Dear SacFamily. We miss you. Come back to DL.

Love,

LoT

Dear apartment complex I looked at today,

Your complex is very nice, however, I will not be renting there. You already charge an insane amount for an apartment and then expect me to pay for a carport on top of my rent. Not to mention I need to buy a parking pass if I want a (note, that is one) guest to visit. It is obvious you frown on people visiting your residents since you do not allow guest parking in any of the abundant (your word) open spaces in your parking lot.

Sincerely,

A disappointed potential renter.

tracilicious

07-20-2006, 05:50 PM

Dear Cat,

You liked Tabasco when you were... what were you seven years ago, like, six? You were a brave little Sactownlet. I don't eat Tabasco and I'm 27 years old.

Cheers,
LSPE

Dear LSPE,

I was 16 before I could handle mild salsa. Baby Jade loves the enchiladas that are spicy for me.

Yours truly,
A Wimp

Dear Baby Jade,

The enchiladas from TJ's were like the one food that I didn't have to share. Thanks a lot.

Love,
Mama

tracilicious

07-20-2006, 05:56 PM

Dear STC,

I miss the MP days when random posters would express shock/disdain when they found out you had kids and your name was a pot reference. Those were good times.

Sincerely,
Me

scaeagles

07-20-2006, 05:57 PM

Dear STC,

I miss the MP days when random posters would express shock/disdain when they found out you had kids and your name was a pot reference. Those were good times.

Sincerely,
Me

Sac's name is a pot reference? I'm shocked!

SacTown Chronic

07-20-2006, 05:58 PM

Dear BTD,

Thanks. We miss our geek friends.

See ya soon,
STC

BarTopDancer

07-20-2006, 06:03 PM

Dear Tracilicious,

In honor of those Pad days, I gave him some [joking] grief about leaving his kids at the hotel (or in the park) while we went "to admire his car".

SacTown Chronic

07-20-2006, 06:07 PM

Dear traci is delicious,

In a strange way, I miss getting taken to task for my lack of parenting skills by online strangers. Good thing they never found out I let my kids laugh at the sight of Robert Plant's dong. Or that I let my six year old daughter put Tobasco sauce on her food.

Sincerely,
One Bad Dad

SacTown Chronic

07-20-2006, 06:08 PM

BarTopDancer

07-20-2006, 06:31 PM

Dear BTD,

That was funny. But what makes me a real bad parent is that I let them roam around DCA while we visited the parking lot. A good parent would have sent them to Disneyland.

Sincerely,
Um, what was I saying?

Bad mojo for you! There are drunk people in DCA! How dare you allow your children be exposed to alcohol! :mad: And they have to walk past so many smoking areas! What kind of parent are you to allow such dangerous behavior? :mad:

:evil: :p :D

lashbear

07-20-2006, 08:12 PM

Dear STC,

I miss the MP days when random posters would express shock/disdain when they found out you had kids and your name was a pot reference. Those were good times.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Me,

OK, I'll bite.

Cheers,
Rob.

Dear STC: Kids ? Next you'll be telling me Crystal's not just your dearest friend, and you're straight !

...So all my fantasies are broken, tattered remnants. Oh well, I'll always have that pic of you in the Superman suit.

well Phooey to you ! There are still plenty of hunky guys on this board that DO appreciate a man.

...Where's Kevy & €uroMeinke ?

Signed,
Frustrated.

Moonliner

07-27-2006, 09:20 AM

Capt Jack

07-27-2006, 10:25 AM

Dear Moonliner,

This is official notice of my application to join your boycott of the worlds worst fast food. Sadly, I think I jumped the gun a bit and have refused to enter their establishment in nearly two years due to their attrocious "food" products.

____________

because the fall didn't kill him...its the abrupt stop at the end that did.

scaeagles

07-27-2006, 10:29 AM

Dear Moonliner,

I have had an aversion to all things fast food for some time now. However, McD has come out with some decent salads, particularly their Asian Chicken Salad, that has become something I enjoy quite a bit. I am afraid I cannot join the boycott, particularly considering I never got much excitement from peeling back game stickers on fry packs.

SCA

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 10:35 AM

Dear Moonliner,
McDonald's has always sucked. Long live In-N-Out.
Signed,
Gemini 'Big Boy' Cricket

Moonliner

07-27-2006, 10:37 AM

Dear Moonliner,

This is official notice of my application to join your boycott of the worlds worst fast food. Sadly, I think I jumped the gun a bit and have refused to enter their establishment in nearly two years due to their attrocious "food" products.

Dear Capt:

You know, if one person, just one person, does it, they may think he's really sick and they won't care.

And if two people do it, in harmony, they may think they're both faggots and they still won't care.

And if three people do it! Can you imagine three people walkin' in to McDonalds, singin' a bar of "Take this place and shove it, I ain't eating here no more" and walkin' out? They may think it's an organization!

And can you imagine fifty people a day? I said FIFTY people a day . . . walkin' in, singin' a bar of "Take this place and shove it, I ain't eating here no more" and walkin' out? Friends, they may think it's a MOVEMENT, and that's what it is: THE MOONLINERS MCDONALDS RESTAURANT ANTI-MASSACREE MOVEMENT! . . . and all you gotta do to join is to sing it the next time it comes around on the guitar.

With feelin'.

Andrew

07-27-2006, 10:44 AM

Dear Moonliner,
McDonald's has always sucked. Long live In-N-Out.
Signed,
Gemini 'Big Boy' Cricket
Dear In-n-Out,

Could you please, please offer some sort of non-beef alternative? No, the cute "grilled cheese" doesn't count. Turkey patty, Gardenburger, anything. I really miss "animal style" and your great shakes and fries, but I don't eat mammal and you don't give me any alternative.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 10:49 AM

faggots
Dear Moonie,
That word me not like.
Signed,
GC

Dear Andrew,
Good idea turkey burgers is.
Signed,
Yoda speaking GC

Moonliner

07-27-2006, 10:50 AM

Moonliner

07-27-2006, 10:54 AM

Dear Moonie,
That word me not like.
Signed,
GC

Hey, it's art. take it up with Arlo Guthrie (http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/parton/2/alice.html#).

However not to worry, I don't think it's likely to come up in polite convseration (or even around here) again.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 10:57 AM

Hey, it's art. take it up with Arlo Guthrie (http://www.fortunecity.com/tinpan/parton/2/alice.html#).

However not to worry, I don't think it's likely to come up in polite convseration (or even around here) again.
Me sorry. Me not know it song.
Signed,
GC in Cookie Monster voice now for some reason...

scaeagles

07-27-2006, 10:58 AM

Dear SCA:

No problem I totally understand your position you scruffy looking corporate butt-licking sycophant nurff-herder.

I, sir, am no nurff-herder.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 11:00 AM

I, sir, am no nurff-herder.
No no no. You're supposed to say 'Who's scruffy looking?' You blew it.
:D

BarTopDancer

07-27-2006, 11:00 AM

Dear In-n-Out,

Could you please, please offer some sort of non-beef alternative? No, the cute "grilled cheese" doesn't count. Turkey patty, Gardenburger, anything. I really miss "animal style" and your great shakes and fries, but I don't eat mammal and you don't give me any alternative.

Dear Andrew,

Grilled cheese animal style, raw onions, no grilled, extra pickles, fries and a dr. pepper is the way to go. SO there.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 11:01 AM

Dear Andrew,

Grilled cheese animal style, raw onions, no grilled, extra pickles, fries and a dr. pepper is the way to go. SO there.
Gross!
:D :p

Moonliner

07-27-2006, 11:03 AM

I, sir, am no nurff-herder.

Dear SCA:

Judges? No I'm sorry we can't give you that one. The response we were looking for was: "Who's scruffy looking?"

Dear GC:

I find cookie monster offensive.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 11:07 AM

Dear GC:

I find cookie monster offensive.
Me sorry. I mean, I apologize from the top of my tiara right down to the bottoms of my platformed shoes. :D

BarTopDancer

07-27-2006, 11:07 AM

Gross!
:D :p
Better than eating the inside of a cow. :p ;)

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 11:11 AM

Better than eating the inside of a cow. :p ;)
Cows are yummy. :p
:D

Andrew

07-27-2006, 11:12 AM

Dear Andrew,

Grilled cheese animal style, raw onions, no grilled, extra pickles, fries and a dr. pepper is the way to go. SO there.
Dear BTD,

Where's the protein? I love cheese, I am the King of Cheese, but a meal needs some kind of protein.

scaeagles

07-27-2006, 11:21 AM

Cows are yummy. :p
:D

I second that. As are pigs, lambs, chickens, squab, ducks, fish, and even an occassional rattlesnake.

Gemini Cricket

07-27-2006, 11:25 AM

I've had rattlesnake and alligator. Rubbery...

Not Afraid

07-27-2006, 11:35 AM

Ummmmm meat.

BarTopDancer

07-27-2006, 11:38 AM

Dear BTD,

Where's the protein? I love cheese, I am the King of Cheese, but a meal needs some kind of protein.

Dear Andrew,

Cheese has protein.

Not Afraid

07-27-2006, 11:43 AM

Cheese is not a complete protein. However, beans and rice together are.

SzczerbiakManiac

07-27-2006, 11:46 AM

Dear BTD,

Where's the protein? I love cheese, I am the King of Cheese, but a meal needs some kind of protein.SzczerbiakManiac,

Please refrain from responding with some sort of crass innuendo to that last letter.

Thanks,
Your Conscious

Matterhorn Fan

07-27-2006, 12:16 PM

Dear McDonald's:

Thanks for sucking a little more joy out of the world you greedy corporate whores.

No longer can I have the simple pleasure of peeling back your little game stickers and winning a BigMac or a large fries. No. Now I have to collect the little stickers, go home, login to your overly large and slow web site, sign up for an account, give you my email address and name, then enter a gazillion number code in order to find out what I already knew, no free munchies for me today.

You suck and now that I think about it your food sucks too. Plus it's not good for me anyway. I hereby formally declare a full on Moonliner boycott of Mcdonalds incorporated worldwide. Take that your corporate ninnies.Dear Moonliner,

Coca-Cola is doing something similar right now (the game, not the boycott). I won't enter those codes online, but a friend of a friend is, so I'll pass the codes on. It's my small way of fighting slimy corporate "we may not have to give any prizes at all!" attitude.

And I've been avoiding all fast food for a while now. Except for the (very) occasional Frosty. Once a year or so is enough, though.

Matterhorn Fan