Mortality

[scaeagles]

I mentioned a couple weeks ago that a former college roommate had died very soon after being diagnosed with leukemia.

Well, with my 20th HS reunion next Saturday in Napa, CA, I've been in contact with some long lost friends about it. I am flabbergasted by the numbers of HS friends that have passed. One died of skin cancer, another during childbirth (??? in this day and age???), another from an infection from a spiderbite (??? again, in this day and age???), another in a traffic accident. There are a couple more that I was made aware of but the circumstances weren't known.

Just freaking wierd.

Am I alone in this revelation of how many people I used to know have died? Or do I have unrealistic expectations? What abou you all out there in LoT land? Have you had common experiences?

[BarTopDancer]

I only know of one person from high school who has died. But I was still friends with her after school up until she died. She died of heart failure, was on the transplant list but one didn't come through in time.

Maybe in 10 years more people will have died. I'll get back to ya :p

[wendybeth]

I had six friends die in a car crash in HS, and another murdered by a serial killer. Since then, one has died of AIDS, one was murdered by her husband, and another (the sister of the one killed by her husband) died in a car crash a year later. Tip of the iceberg here- I could go on and on, but it's too depressing. I don't go to reunions because of this. We had a huge graduating class, but most of my friends are now gone.

[Alex]

I'm aware of only one person from high school having since died (14 years) but then since leaving high school I've been in contact with only four people from high school. So I probably don't know about any others.

[scaeagles]

Holy cow, WB. I had a graduating class of about 500 (not all I have listed above were in my class, however - a couple were a year younger), and I wonder how many have passed. This is leading me to have a morbid desire to search statistics related to what percentage of people die at what age. Seems like your class and my class are lowering the average life expactancy, WB.

[katiesue]

I did my 20 year a couple years ago. As far as I know we only had two members who died. One when we were I think sophmores, she was diabetic and went into a coma. The other, my best friend, died in a car crash a couple months after graduation.

I was a little worried when I was trying to track down classmembers that I would contact a family only to find out their child had died. But luckily that didn't happen.

The classes ahead and behind mine have had quite a few classmembers die through various circumstances.

[blueerica]

I've probably attended three times as many funerals as I have weddings, probably more. I had the misfortune of friends (yes, multiple, in separate incidents) dying while in their high school years. I've lost people since high school, and this is all the more unfortunate considering I lived in the middle of no where, and graduated with 70 people.


I've lost friends I've made since, but I don't let it hurt the same way anymore. Few things remain absolutes for me, but Kevin Smith in his myspace blog wrote something last week that holds so true.

Friends - there's only one absolute in the world: the grave waits for us all.

And I'm not saddened by death, but comforted in it. To know that my time on this Earth is not eternal is all the more reason I need to be living it now. We're just blips, or to quote Kansas: All we are is dust in the wind. It gives me resolution that in my tiny existence I need to capture in it as much as I can. That's comforting in it's own way. I have a mission, and I have since I was 14, when my best friend Tim died. What kills me are the times I forget my "mission."

But yeah, I'm 28, and I don't have enough fingers to count just high school friends that have passed on. Sadly, I'm missing my 10 year reunion... :(

[jdramj]

I am coming up to my 20th, and quite frankly my class sucked. No one was really friends with anyone. I had more friends in the grades before and after mine. This inlcudes my husband who was in the class after mine. This is how bad it really is, my 10 year reunion was cancelled for lack of interest.

I only know of 1 classmate that died, and he was on the 405 freeway about 5 years ago and jumped the center divider and was immediately hit by a car. I'm not sure of why anyone in their right mind would do this, as they believe he had ran all the way accross one side of the freeway (obviously not getting hit) before jumping the divider.

[wendybeth]

Holy cow, WB. I had a graduating class of about 500 (not all I have listed above were in my class, however - a couple were a year younger), and I wonder how many have passed. This is leading me to have a morbid desire to search statistics related to what percentage of people die at what age. Seems like your class and my class are lowering the average life expactancy, WB.

My class was about 550, but not all that I listed were the same grade either. My friend who was murdered went to a different school, but I kind of just group all my friends together without regard to what school, grad class, etc. The thing is, I learned early on that I was not immortal and that death could happen anytime, anywhere. It's kind of freeing, really- teaches you to plan for the future, but live in the now. I'm sad that my friends missed out on so many life events, and I think I am way more appreciative of all that I am and have due to such early losses.

[Capt Jack]

we were a pretty big inner city school. between 600 and 700 grads.

my 25 year reunion just passed. while I didnt attend, I was in contact with a number of folks who did. the number of those no longer living was sadly pretty extensive. a dozen or more easy.

yeah, its deeply shocking.

[Mousey Girl]

Leo, dying in childbirth is not that impossible, it doesn't happen often, but it still happens. I almost died with Nickolas. Had my original OB been the one there at the hospital I would have died, luckily he was not and the doctor who was there acted quickly. It still upsets my mom to talk about it.

My 20 year is going to be over Thanksgiving weekend. The only person that I know of who died was killed about a year after graduation. He was a punk who mouthed off to the wrong person during a party. He was very cruel and thought he could get away with anything.

I probably will not be attending the reunion. I have given it much thought and I only really associated with about 10 people out of a class of 300, and was only close to 3 or 4. It is fun to see how everyone has changed, but since I don't remember them anyway I don't really care. I was only there for my Jr & Sr years and tried to keep to myself as much as possible.

With the subject or mortality, the anniversay of Jimmy's suicide is quickly approaching. it just amazes me that by taking his own life he has managed to ruin the lives of a lot of others (mine included).

[Strangler Lewis]

An oddly poignant exercise is to take your teachers/professors with unique names or some form of acclaim and Google them or look them up on the Social Security Death Index to see who has died. I found a couple of new ones just last night.