Disneyphile
01-17-2007, 02:33 PM
(Disclaimer: This is all about me. So, if I don't interest you, stop reading now, lest you enjoy gagging profusely. And I'm not providing barf bags. ;) I've cross-posted this from another site and from my LiveJournal, for those who haven't seen it. )
My life has taken a drastic turn in just the last 7 days, and it's so exciting (but scary!) that I need to share. :D
I used to work in the television and film industry as a cameraperson. Jobs became very scarce for me about 6 years ago, so I took a fulltime computer job with a major corporation. The only benefit - a steady paycheck.
Over the last 6 years, I had become very comfortable in my surroundings. While secure, I've been miserable. I missed the days of waking up, excited to go to work, as I did when I operated a camera.
The sting of that comfortable misery hit last year when I saw the Black Pearl and her camera crew off the coast. I told my friend, "I should be on one of those camera boats. And, I could have been had I not given up." I cried that day, feeling like I let my dreams waste away to be a corporate drone.
I talked to fellow swanker Never Grow Up about this too, and he suggested doing wedding videography, which would free up my weekdays to edit the wedding package, but also pick up day shoots in the industry again. Well, that'd be great and all, except I had no professional equipment.
I stewed over this for the last couple months of 2006, pained by turning down phonecalls for day shoots for cable shows, indy films, etc. I had to get my gear, but it would take awhile, plus thousands of dollars that I don't have, and besides, I have the comfort of a steady paycheck.
NGU kept pushing me a bit - telling me to get my gear and come to weddings. Yeah, it would be nice.
Then, he called me last week, flat out telling me to come work with him - just get my gear and do it finally, and that he'd help advertise for me and everything.
So, I made a phonecall to my parents, to see if they could help, and I was sure they'd turn me down. About an hour later, they called back, ecstatic and more than willing to help. :eek:
I hung up the phone, and nearly fell from my chair in my "comfort cube" at the office. It was actually going to happen. :eek:
Shaking, I started researching resources for the equipment, calculated total cost, and it was transferred to my account the next day. I couldn't believe it. I was at the point of no return - my parents expected me to go forth, conquer the dream, and pay them back (of course). It was (and still is) very exciting and very, very scary. It's a BIG change from the usual M-F mundane work of which I'm been used to for the last 6 years. The fear is the sign that I'm doing the right thing. Stepping outside the box (in this case, represented by my cube) is a very frightening thing to do, but it has to happen to truly obtain what we desire in life.
I also recall the physical demands involved with camera work, so I have no choice but to get back to the gym, and rebuild my strength and energy. So, my physical self will be changing too - I have no choice, unless I give up on the dream, just for the "comfort" of an office chair. NO WAY am I letting that happen.
In the last week, the ball has been rolling quickly. It's so amazing and frightening, I've calmed my panic by envisioning that ball as being made from stone, and I'm like Indiana Jones - working swiftly so that I don't get crushed by it, and eventually conquering it. (And, I even have a jeep of friends below me, ready to help that happen. ;) ) But, yes, it's scary - I've had the shakes, lost sleep (too much adrenaline), and even a twitch here and there. I've also cried, screamed with joy, and am happier than ever. And, I can't stop grinning like the Cheshire Cat during every waking moment. :D
Friends have come forth in assistance, the equipment is ordered, I've signed back up at the gym (with an awesome personal trainer!), and events are already being booked. I've even received some more calls about day shoots, of which they're now noting that I will have my own gear after this week. With the current outlook, I should be able to safely leave the corporate world within the next two months, possibly even sooner. :cool:
I received the video camera yesterday, and cried when I loaded it into my car. It was one of the best days ever, and they only keep getting better! :)
Never Grow Up is amazing, and I'm so thankful for him pushing me out the door. We'll be working together on events, so check out his site - www.paulmanke.com (http://www.paulmanke.com/). He's a brilliant photographer, and a truly fantastic friend. :snap:
I've got a LOT to do over the next month - familiarize with the new camera, work my butt off (literally) at the gym, and prepare for a fantastic new adventure of a lifetime. I can't wait to capture the moments of a bride's biggest day, and also pick up some of those day shoots and watch my work on the screen once again.
Like Walt said, "It's kind of fun to do the impossible." :cool:
Don't stop dreaming - that door will spring open when you least expect it, and you need to run through it, scary as it may seem at first.
To summarize, this is how I've been feeling and still do:
:D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :D
My life has taken a drastic turn in just the last 7 days, and it's so exciting (but scary!) that I need to share. :D
I used to work in the television and film industry as a cameraperson. Jobs became very scarce for me about 6 years ago, so I took a fulltime computer job with a major corporation. The only benefit - a steady paycheck.
Over the last 6 years, I had become very comfortable in my surroundings. While secure, I've been miserable. I missed the days of waking up, excited to go to work, as I did when I operated a camera.
The sting of that comfortable misery hit last year when I saw the Black Pearl and her camera crew off the coast. I told my friend, "I should be on one of those camera boats. And, I could have been had I not given up." I cried that day, feeling like I let my dreams waste away to be a corporate drone.
I talked to fellow swanker Never Grow Up about this too, and he suggested doing wedding videography, which would free up my weekdays to edit the wedding package, but also pick up day shoots in the industry again. Well, that'd be great and all, except I had no professional equipment.
I stewed over this for the last couple months of 2006, pained by turning down phonecalls for day shoots for cable shows, indy films, etc. I had to get my gear, but it would take awhile, plus thousands of dollars that I don't have, and besides, I have the comfort of a steady paycheck.
NGU kept pushing me a bit - telling me to get my gear and come to weddings. Yeah, it would be nice.
Then, he called me last week, flat out telling me to come work with him - just get my gear and do it finally, and that he'd help advertise for me and everything.
So, I made a phonecall to my parents, to see if they could help, and I was sure they'd turn me down. About an hour later, they called back, ecstatic and more than willing to help. :eek:
I hung up the phone, and nearly fell from my chair in my "comfort cube" at the office. It was actually going to happen. :eek:
Shaking, I started researching resources for the equipment, calculated total cost, and it was transferred to my account the next day. I couldn't believe it. I was at the point of no return - my parents expected me to go forth, conquer the dream, and pay them back (of course). It was (and still is) very exciting and very, very scary. It's a BIG change from the usual M-F mundane work of which I'm been used to for the last 6 years. The fear is the sign that I'm doing the right thing. Stepping outside the box (in this case, represented by my cube) is a very frightening thing to do, but it has to happen to truly obtain what we desire in life.
I also recall the physical demands involved with camera work, so I have no choice but to get back to the gym, and rebuild my strength and energy. So, my physical self will be changing too - I have no choice, unless I give up on the dream, just for the "comfort" of an office chair. NO WAY am I letting that happen.
In the last week, the ball has been rolling quickly. It's so amazing and frightening, I've calmed my panic by envisioning that ball as being made from stone, and I'm like Indiana Jones - working swiftly so that I don't get crushed by it, and eventually conquering it. (And, I even have a jeep of friends below me, ready to help that happen. ;) ) But, yes, it's scary - I've had the shakes, lost sleep (too much adrenaline), and even a twitch here and there. I've also cried, screamed with joy, and am happier than ever. And, I can't stop grinning like the Cheshire Cat during every waking moment. :D
Friends have come forth in assistance, the equipment is ordered, I've signed back up at the gym (with an awesome personal trainer!), and events are already being booked. I've even received some more calls about day shoots, of which they're now noting that I will have my own gear after this week. With the current outlook, I should be able to safely leave the corporate world within the next two months, possibly even sooner. :cool:
I received the video camera yesterday, and cried when I loaded it into my car. It was one of the best days ever, and they only keep getting better! :)
Never Grow Up is amazing, and I'm so thankful for him pushing me out the door. We'll be working together on events, so check out his site - www.paulmanke.com (http://www.paulmanke.com/). He's a brilliant photographer, and a truly fantastic friend. :snap:
I've got a LOT to do over the next month - familiarize with the new camera, work my butt off (literally) at the gym, and prepare for a fantastic new adventure of a lifetime. I can't wait to capture the moments of a bride's biggest day, and also pick up some of those day shoots and watch my work on the screen once again.
Like Walt said, "It's kind of fun to do the impossible." :cool:
Don't stop dreaming - that door will spring open when you least expect it, and you need to run through it, scary as it may seem at first.
To summarize, this is how I've been feeling and still do:
:D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :D :eek: :D