Nephythys
03-12-2008, 06:00 AM
Ok working on the nitty gritty down and dirty-:) Looking to tap the LoT collective.....
Got a laugh out of this one-
Pastor: Will you answer me right now
These questions, as your wedding vow?
Groom: Yes, I will answer right now
Your questions as my wedding vow.
Pastor: Will you take her as your wife?
Will you love her all your life?
Groom: Yes, I take her as my wife,
Yes, I'll love her all my life.
Pastor: Will you have, and also hold
Just as you have at this time told?
Groom: Yes, I will have, and I will hold,
Just as I have at this time told,
Yes, I will love her all my life
As I now take her as my wife.
Pastor: Will you love through good and bad?
Whether you're happy or sad?
Groom: Yes, I'll love through good and bad,
Whether we're happy or sad,
Yes, I will have and I will hold
Just as I have already told,
Yes, I will love her all my life,
Yes, I will take her as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love her if you're rich?
Or if you're poor, and in a ditch?
Groom: Yes, I'll love her if we're rich,
And I will love her in a ditch,
I'll love her through good times and bad,
Whether we are happy or sad,
Yes, I will have, and I will hold
(I could have sworn this has been told!)
I promise to love all my life
This woman, as my lawful wife!
Pastor: Will you love her when you're fit,
And also when you're feeling sick?
Groom: Yes, I'll love her when we're fit,
And when we're hurt, and when we're sick,
And I will love her when we're rich
And I will love her in a ditch
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold
Ten years from now a thousandfold,
Yes, I will love for my whole life
This lovely woman as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love with all your heart?
Will you love till death you part?
Groom: Yes, I'll love with all my heart
From now until death do us part,
And I will love her when we're rich,
And when we're broke and in a ditch,
And when we're fit, and when we're sick,
(Oh, CAN'T we get this finished quick?)
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold,
And if I might now be so bold,
I'll love her my entire life,
Yes, I WILL take her as my wife!
Pastor: Then if you'll take her as your wife,
And if you'll love her all your life,
And if you'll have, and if you'll hold,
From now until the stars grow cold,
And if you'll love through good and bad,
And whether you're happy or sad,
And love in sickness, and in health,
And when you're poor, and when in wealth,
And if you'll love with all your heart,
From now until death do you part,
Yes, if you'll love her through and through,
Please answer with these words:
Pastor and Groom: I DO!
Pastor: You're married now! So kiss the bride,
But please, do keep it dignified.
Or this one-
Groom: I, Mad Dog _______________ take ye, Saucy ______________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Good Wench with a stout right hook, the bright dawn of each new day and the soft bed of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh when yer feelin' out of sorts and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on and on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from the elements and the elephants should we ever encounter them as it is my understanding that they can be very large and unpredictable. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that what I am really speaking about is you. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.
Bride: I, Saucy _________________ take ye, Mad Dog __________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Salty Jack with a crooked smile, the foggy haze of each new day and the lumpy (but familiar) mattress of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh so hard the rum comes out yer nose and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from my wrath and from giraffes which I understand are very tall and will sometimes step on people because they are not looking where they are stepping. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that I am day dreaming again. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.
LOL- ok ok, working on it.
Ideas?
Got a laugh out of this one-
Pastor: Will you answer me right now
These questions, as your wedding vow?
Groom: Yes, I will answer right now
Your questions as my wedding vow.
Pastor: Will you take her as your wife?
Will you love her all your life?
Groom: Yes, I take her as my wife,
Yes, I'll love her all my life.
Pastor: Will you have, and also hold
Just as you have at this time told?
Groom: Yes, I will have, and I will hold,
Just as I have at this time told,
Yes, I will love her all my life
As I now take her as my wife.
Pastor: Will you love through good and bad?
Whether you're happy or sad?
Groom: Yes, I'll love through good and bad,
Whether we're happy or sad,
Yes, I will have and I will hold
Just as I have already told,
Yes, I will love her all my life,
Yes, I will take her as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love her if you're rich?
Or if you're poor, and in a ditch?
Groom: Yes, I'll love her if we're rich,
And I will love her in a ditch,
I'll love her through good times and bad,
Whether we are happy or sad,
Yes, I will have, and I will hold
(I could have sworn this has been told!)
I promise to love all my life
This woman, as my lawful wife!
Pastor: Will you love her when you're fit,
And also when you're feeling sick?
Groom: Yes, I'll love her when we're fit,
And when we're hurt, and when we're sick,
And I will love her when we're rich
And I will love her in a ditch
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold
Ten years from now a thousandfold,
Yes, I will love for my whole life
This lovely woman as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love with all your heart?
Will you love till death you part?
Groom: Yes, I'll love with all my heart
From now until death do us part,
And I will love her when we're rich,
And when we're broke and in a ditch,
And when we're fit, and when we're sick,
(Oh, CAN'T we get this finished quick?)
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold,
And if I might now be so bold,
I'll love her my entire life,
Yes, I WILL take her as my wife!
Pastor: Then if you'll take her as your wife,
And if you'll love her all your life,
And if you'll have, and if you'll hold,
From now until the stars grow cold,
And if you'll love through good and bad,
And whether you're happy or sad,
And love in sickness, and in health,
And when you're poor, and when in wealth,
And if you'll love with all your heart,
From now until death do you part,
Yes, if you'll love her through and through,
Please answer with these words:
Pastor and Groom: I DO!
Pastor: You're married now! So kiss the bride,
But please, do keep it dignified.
Or this one-
Groom: I, Mad Dog _______________ take ye, Saucy ______________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Good Wench with a stout right hook, the bright dawn of each new day and the soft bed of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh when yer feelin' out of sorts and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on and on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from the elements and the elephants should we ever encounter them as it is my understanding that they can be very large and unpredictable. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that what I am really speaking about is you. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.
Bride: I, Saucy _________________ take ye, Mad Dog __________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Salty Jack with a crooked smile, the foggy haze of each new day and the lumpy (but familiar) mattress of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh so hard the rum comes out yer nose and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from my wrath and from giraffes which I understand are very tall and will sometimes step on people because they are not looking where they are stepping. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that I am day dreaming again. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.
LOL- ok ok, working on it.
Ideas?