What do you NOT do because your Mom/Dad did?

[katiesue]

My sister and I were talking about this the other day. All the things we specifially do NOT do because our Mom did and it drove us bonkers.

Neither of us iron. Anything, Ever. My Mom irons everything. Jeans, sweats, sweaters, underwear, towels, you name it, she irons it.

We don't bake stuff. Not that we can't but we just don't. My Mom bakes for every occassion, usually starting at about 1 AM making godawful noise and being a complete phycho about it all so we just don't.

We don't stay at the checkstand after checkout to not only record the amount of our check/atm but also balance the checkbook. It's embarassing and it holds up the whole line. We also don't stay parked at the gas station and figure out our mileage after every fill up.

We don't do leftovers. My mother saves every little bit for later. I've seen her save a single stem of brocolli. I hate leftovers.

We can go to bed if there are dishes in the sink. Doesn't bother us a bit. My mother literally can not go to bed if there is a spoon in the sink.

We hate apricots. Hate the taste, hate the smell, hate. Our jobs as kids were to pick them up off the ground when they were all runny with ants crawling through them. Gross.

Anyone else?

[Alex]

I don't have children because my mom did and they all suck. I think everybody should follow my example.

[katiesue]

No children would solve the whole problem, Alex has a point.

[Capt Jack]

I don't have children because my mom did and they all suck. I think everybody should follow my example.

No children would solve the whole problem, Alex has a point.

count me in.

I can still have dogs, right?

[Not Afraid]

I don't go to church and my parents were VERY involved in the church.

And, I agree with the children statement. I'm not sorry we don't have any.

[Alex]

Sorry, my mom had dogs. She also had cats (and at times rabbits, birds, chickens, hamsters, fish, and salamanders), but I'm willing to take a principled stand on allowing cat pwnership.

[Capt Jack]

...cat pwnership.


PWND!

[Alex]

I made a good typo! Cat pwnership about describes it.

[Disneyphile]

The biggest thing - I don't litter.

Yes, sadly my parents would litter all the time, and they tried teaching me to do the same. My father still litters to this day. Yet, he complains when he sees a dirty roadside, saying, "What the hell are my taxes going to if they're not cleaning this up?" :rolleyes:

They finally learned to never litter from my car, because I'd pull over and make a big deal about having to pick it up. Parking lots were their favorite place to empty car trash. So, whenever we were in their car and they'd park, I'd watch to see if they were chucking anything out of the car. I'd stop and pick it all up and loudly say, "Hold on! I've gotta grab the trash you threw out." Then, they'd get pissed at me for "embarrassing them".

Karma's been biting back though, because to this day, my father is always picking up littered trash in his front yard, totally bitching about how other people are so inconsiderate... :rolleyes:

I also won't listen to talk radio, especially news. During family road trips, my dad would always turn on KNX 1070 News Radio (the jingle is forever burned in my mind), even from 300 miles away. So, I'd be forced to listen to static-laden constantly repeating news reports during a 5-6 hour drive, with my father constantly interjecting his opinions about all the horrible things in the world. I endured that up until my mother gifted me with a Walkman in my teen years.

And, I don't like politics and negative news. That was also shoved down my throat since I was very little. Imagine being a 4-5 year old child and seeing images of sensationalized war reports and/or stories of murder and sexual predators, and then being told "It's real kid. You need to wise up to the world around you." And, considering most little kids don't know geography that well, I assumed it was happening very close by, and was constantly scared to go outside unless other kids were out also, and told me it was safe. I was forced to watch news about kids who died climbing trees, riding their bikes, etc. It instilled a lot of fear over trying things, believing I'd "crack my head open and die like the kids on the news" if I ever went skiing, climbed a tree, rode my bike outside of the neighborhood, among many other things. It caused a lot of social problems for me when growing up, because I wasn't allowed to go on most outings with friends, even when supervised by their parents. To this day, I still struggle with climbing ladders, riding a bike near any traffic, hiking near steep areas, etc. :(

[tracilicious]

I don't clear my throat repeatedly or walk around with my arm bent at the elbow and my hand in the air.

I don't say things like "watchamacallit," "thingamajig," or "doohickey."

I don't treat retail employees with disdain.

[BarTopDancer]

I tip well. I was completely embarrassed when I found out how much my parents were tipping.

I don't collect a lot of stuff. My mom has figurines all over the place. I did collect Disney figures and shot glasses until I moved out. They are all in boxes now because clutter bugs me.

I don't keep things I *might* use. My parents garage is full of things they might need some day. Tons of empty boxes in case they need to pack something away. My mom wanted me to save the broken bed frame when my new bed gets here, in case they might need it. I told her if she was at my place when they picked up the bed she could take it. As bad as this sounds (because I'm sure everyone dreads this) I am dreading having to go through their house.

I generally don't make my bed. I had to have it made every day before I went to school, or played. I'll straighten the sheets, if I care enough. I also don't empty the dishwasher the moment it's done running, nor do I fold my sheets and towels the second the dryer stops.

[Tenigma]

I like very mundane 9-5 salaried jobs because my dad was self-employed and I hated the lack of predictability, living between flood and famine.

[katiesue]

I don't make my bed either. And my Mom asked Maddy once when she was little if she made her bed and Maz literally had no idea what she was even talking about.

My Mom is queen of the "might need" stuff. It will literally take us years to go through the house.

[Gemini Cricket]

I don't smoke.
I don't want kids.
I don't go to church.

[BarTopDancer]

It will literally take us years to go through the house.

I'm getting a dumpster or 2, a bunch of beer and wine and a certain person who knows who they are.

I'm encouraging my mother to take all the 80s clothing she has (hers and mine) to Goodwill and donate it while it's in fashion.

[~MS~]

1. I don't iron except when doing crafts that require it

2. I never allow food to be an issue at meals ...ever...I had a 3 bite rule for my kids, at the end of 3 bites if they hated a food they never had to taste it again.

3. I have no problem tossing leftovers. We don't like them and won't eat them so I see no point in saving it.

4. I will spend a few cents more and buy a thicker garbage bag even if it does cost a whole 25 cents more per box.

5. I have never once served my family any form of poweder milk intentionally (I say this because it might be an ingredient in some thing I'm unaware of)

6. I don't let my husbands dislike of foods or amusement parks keep Missy and me from enjoying things we like. I also don't expect him to sit home 24/7 doing stuff we like either. He's more than welcome to go on rides on his Harley to just "be".

7. I do not WAIT on my husband, If I happen to be in the kitchen I'll ask him if he wants a drink or snack if I'm already making it, but he knows better than to do 'make me a sammich woman' .....by the same token, he'll ask me if I want something if he's in the kitchen making a snack...we call it respect.

8. I don't believe that using corporal punishment is the first line of response in raising children.

9. I believe in letting Missy have a voice even if she is disagreeing with me...it doesn't mean she's allowed to be a brat but she's allowed to disagree and we'll discuss things.

10. I do not now nor will I ever eat liver and onions...this is seperate from the 3 bite rule.

[LSPoorEeyorick]

I tip very well. My parents never worked in a service industry that paid in tips, and I had several arguments with them after I'd had lots of waiter friends who lived on what people tipped. Even if your food is not perfect, or if it didn't arrive in a timely fashion... usually not the waiter's fault, and they rely on what you give.

I don't lash out angrily, I (rarely if ever) say things I don't mean because I'm frustrated, I try my damnedest not to take things out on the people who haven't made me angry. My mother was a very angry woman when she was younger. Particularly when she was stressed because of vacation or holiday preparation, it would seep out of her and fall on anyone nearby. I imagine that due to both nature and nurture, I am one of those people who really chews on things before responding. I take my time coming to terms with what is frustrating me. I vent to other people, usually the people who are not involved in what's frustrating me. Then when I feel like I fully understand what's upsetting me, and I am rational about expressing it; if I feel that any good can come of it - I talk to the source of frustration. But I do notice that I really do get very stressed during the same times she did. Last week before my flight I thought I was going to explode. All the same, I didn't say anything mean to my partner or my coworkers or clients.

I don't hide what I eat. Well, when I was younger, I did. But over the past ten years, I've grown to realize that it's a diseased way of thinking. I eat healthfully, and I have a treat from time to time. And when I do, I own it and I'm not ashamed of doing it in public.

I don't vote Republican. But then, they don't either, anymore. It took a couple of terms of terrible administration for them to realize that it isn't a single-issue world, and just because their former party was on their side of their pet issue, all of the OTHER issues they disagreed with aren't without merit.

I didn't stay in a small town. But then, we knew this would happen even when I was wee and would squeal the first moment I would catch a glimpse of skyline on vacation. I don't begrudge them their small-town living or my small-town coming-of-age. But I certainly appreciate where I've chosen to live now.

But there are a great, great many things I DO do because they did them. They built a family where children should be playful and ask questions, and I certainly encourage that of my nieces and nephews (hopefully children someday, too.) They were always there for their friends and family, and I try to be, too. They used humor to get through tough situations, and I do that as much as I can. They felt a real responsibility for their work, and would work very hard until it was completed. They played as hard as they could when they weren't working. They did what they could to understand those around them and metaphorically walk in their shoes. All of these things make me who I am, just as much (or more) than the things they taught me not to do (by doing them.)

[€uroMeinke]

I don't smoke cigars

[3894]

There are a lot of differences. I can think of one right now:

1. I don't buy a lot of packaged foods. My mother made a lot of Swanson's tv dinners, Kraft mac, and faux maple syrup from maple flavoring and corn syrup and water. My dad made cornflakes and also instant pudding. I cook and so does my husband and our kids. We make bread in the bread machine and our own strawberry jam. We make pancakes from scratch and eat them with real maple syrup, etc., etc., etc. Slow food is important to us.

[JWBear]

...Slow food is important to us.

And so much better tasting, and better for you!

[lindyhop]

I've never bought Tide detergent because my mother always did.

[scaeagles]

My mom died at 39. I'm 39 now. I don't want to do that.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Both of my parents smoke incessantly. I have never, ever even been curious about cigarettes. Nasty.

There is a long list of things that I am trying very hard not to do that my parents did. Things like disrespecting others and being a blowhard know-it-all. I find it rather depressing, as I often fail to prevent outbreaks. It's like I'm doomed to be this way, with only minor respites of clarity. I've been thinking a lot about that lately.

[Kevy Baby]

It's funny reading a lot of these as there are many (Tide and other products, smoking, beating my wife) that my parents used/did that I do as well.

But one thing that I vowed that I would never do that my parents did was to get a divorce.

[Prudence]

I try not to be late. I'm generally overly early. My mother, for whatever reason, hates getting anywhere even on time. She HAS to be late.

[wolfy999]

I don't gamble

I don't go to the races

I try to smile at all times

I try to live happily with out yelling constantly

I try.....!!!

Thanks Dad for making me a better person than you were!

[Alex]

In a more serious vein than my initial answer, I don't think my parents have been that big an influence on me. But one thing did occur to me.

I never argue or complain about price. My stepfather was embarrassing in this regard. He'd complain to a cashier about the price of a pair of pants while he was buying them. I was always mortified and felt it emphasized our poverty (we were).

So now, I will go to great lengths to act as if price doesn't matter. For the most part this is true since I don't really have any qualms about spending money but as an example, I will for the most part never ask "how much is this" before I buy something because then if I don't buy it, it will look like it was because of the price.

[Kevy Baby]

I don't drink
Or swear
I don't rat my hair
I get ill from one cigarette

[Cadaverous Pallor]

I eat at restaurants other than delis.

I saved money continue to do so.

I don't talk politics in social situations with people who don't agree with me unless I absolutely have to, and then I keep things down to a low roar. I also don't insult people in those situations.

[blueerica]

Partially in relation to the flip-side thread, I wonder if I've ever NOT done something because my mom or dad did, and what is the moment that happens? I generally don't choose against something because someone does it, whether I like that person or not - the same applies to my parents. Then, I have been rather removed from them as parents so maybe it's like me doing not doing something because some guy down the street does it.

If anything, I've made a point to be able to recognize and leave a relationship that's bad or not working. If I leave, I mean it. I don't turn around the next afternoon and cry to come back. It's hard, but you have to value yourself before anyone else will value you. I do that, because my mom didn't.

[Strangler Lewis]

My mother always made my bed. I don't make my bed.

Hmm.

[NickO'Time]

I refuse too allow myself to become overweight or sit on the couch.

I won't lay a finger on my wife or my daughter/child when I am angry(my father did-too my horror finding my mother on the floor in the kitchen comes to mind.

I'm spending quality time with my child/children. :)

I don't patch bike tubes.

And we have cats and a dog.

[wendybeth]

I never hit my kid, I try to never play guilt trips, and I tell her I love her all the time. I also hug her lots, which as a teen she is can be a bit resistant to, but I don't care. :D

[Gn2Dlnd]

I don't buy a garage's worth of paper towels because they're on sale, nor do I buy the cheapest version of the thing I like because "it's the same thing."

I don't go camping, and I wish I did.

[catfiend]

- I don't drink and drive - largely because I've seen what it's like from the passenger's seat.

- I rarely drink at all when I'm out and around as I don't want it to become the social crutch that it was for my dad. We're both very shy and introverted but I'm trying to work my way out of the shell without having to lubricate it.

- I don't get involved with many things that don't also involve my wife. My parents frequently seemed to go weeks without seeing each other much (and their kids less.)

- I won't have kids. My mother once told me that if she had it to do all over again she wouldn't either. Uplifting message for your son.

- I don't treat my house as just a place to crash between work and other commitments. I love my home and I want it to show in how it's maintaned.

- I don't smoke. My mom actually helped out here as she offered me one of her brother's cigarettes some years before she took up the habit. There was a Calvin and Hobbes strip that illustrated the same approach :)

- I refuse to make my life one series of commitments after another. My wife and our cats are more important than any of those other things that I might be doing so they get the bulk of my time.

[SzczerbiakManiac]

My parents did/do, but I do not: believe in imaginary friends (like God, for instance)
deliberately hang out with other people once a week for the express purpose of believing in imaginary friends (like church, for example)
get skeeved at the thought of two people of the same gender loving each other
enjoy camping
vote Republican or Democrat
consistently arrive an hour or more late to pretty much everything
become psychotic if guests are coming over and the house is not immaculately clean (that's a mom thing)
yell at people (unless it is a life or death situation)
try to convince my grandmother that OJ really did kill his wife (another mom thing)
spank my children's bare ass with a 2x4 (well, if I had kids...)
throw things away (I am a total packrat--not proud of this fact though)
make my bed (there is no point in this daily ritual)
enjoy driving long distances
become stymied when sitting in front of a computer
have a VCR that flashes 12:00 all the time
like to drive a stick shift
work out (my dad burned me on this by making it torturous)
especially enjoy playing sports
enjoy watching sports on TV (with a couple exceptions, most notably the Olympics)
enjoy Westerns and/or Old West culture