Boris is [WAS] missing

[Prudence]

As most of you have heard by now, Boris is missing.

When we woke up this morning, we noticed that Boris didn't come jump on the bed as soon as he heard the sounds of waking humans. We got up, and as I looked around the living room I noticed that I couldn't see either cat. Neither of them were on the chairs, or in the office, or in the bedroom, or in the cat box.....

As I went to check the landing, I saw that the front door was wide open. I don't know how or why the door was open. Nothing was missing- except the cats. I started to make panic noises and was running for clothes when I heard a jingling racing up the stairs - it was Sasha. So we do have one cat safe here at home.

But Boris was gone. We spent all day calling for him. We made and distributed flyers and talked to most of our neighbors. We went up and down the streets and alleys for 2-3 blocks in each direction, depending on where main streets were. Boris is a big scairdy cat, so we figure he wouldn't have crossed a major roadway. In fact, it doesn't make sense for him to have gone very far at all, but so far we haven't found him.

I have met every single other cat in my area, and there are a lot, and some are very noisy, but I have not found Boris.

Boris is my baby. He needs medication twice a day. He needs to come home. I don't know why he ran away or where he could have gone.

I've been sobbing all day. Tomorrow I will have to go to work, and I don't know how I'm going to manage it. I keep willing the phone to ring and it doesn't. I keep willing myself to hear his meow, but I don't. My poor Boris is gone and I just want to hold him again.

[innerSpaceman]

Hugs and good fortune.


Boris, bad kitty, go.home.NOW.

[Not Afraid]

I would sit outside all evening talking. The sound of your voice might bring him out and home.

[Ghoulish Delight]

I hope he returns safe, sound, and loving soon.

[Disneyphile]

Hopefully, he'll return soon. Might just be hiding out under something until after nightfall.

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Hoping and praying for his safe and soon return.

[Prudence]

We've been taking turns going up and down the streets all evening. Ryan crawled under a neighbor's house. We've talked to so many neighbors, His flyer is up everywhere. Everyone we meet says "oh, we saw your flyer." I guess that's good. I even talked to the UPS driver.

I just don't know what to think. The only other time he got out, he started meowing as soon as he heard my voice. That hasn't happened this time. I don't know if that means he's not close by - maybe he jumped in the back of someone's pick-up and took a road trip, or maybe he followed a kitty in heat, or maybe he just decided to break character and strike out for a distance - or if he's too scared, or if maybe he's sicker than I thought and just, you know.....

That cat has so much personality. The apartment seems empty without him. So quiet. No one jumping up on laps or the table or eating plants or causing a ruckus.

We put out food and water for him, and his cat carrier so he has something to hide in if he comes back. I want to sleep with the door open tonight (with Sasha locked up), but I'm guessing that's not a great plan.

[flippyshark]

I have been to this worrisome and fretful place with my own Illuminati - and I started a thread here just like you have. She was away for 8 nights, and came back all by herself, wet and muddy but unharmed. I kept lights on, music playing, and I went out and talked to the bushes and shrubs around my building every night.

Stay hopeful and watchful, and I will send <hugs> and <hopeful kitty vibes.>

[wolfy999]

I'll be thinking of you and Boris tonight....cats usually return to where the food is, so good thoughts for a breakfast family reunion!

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Here's hoping he comes back soon, safe and sound.

[Betty]

come back kitty!

[RStar]

Yes, I too have been through this. I know how you feel.

Best wishes for a wonderful outcome. I hope Boris is back in your arms safe and sound today.

{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

[Prudence]

No Boris this morning. I should have left the door open last night. I know he's probably dead and it's my fault. I had him declawed. I didn't double check that the door was shut tight and locked. I let a poor, sick, defenseless indoor kitty, who was depending on me, get out into the outside world. I continue to spend my waking hours weeping for him. He deserved better than me. I love him so much it's just breaking my heart that he's out there alone, thinking I abandoned him. I've never felt this level of guilt before. I don't even know what to do with myself.

[Snowflake]

Pru

Don't give up, keep calling for him, setting food out for him and looking for him. Don't lose hope!

Boris, come home kitty boy!

[Gemini Cricket]

I hope Boris returns soon. Safe and sound.
:)

[wolfy999]

I've had a kitty disappear for two weeks...he came back, a little frazzled but alive and well. Don't ever give up Pru, Boris will come back!

[Cadaverous Pallor]

No Boris this morning. I should have left the door open last night. I know he's probably dead and it's my fault. I had him declawed. I didn't double check that the door was shut tight and locked. I let a poor, sick, defenseless indoor kitty, who was depending on me, get out into the outside world. I continue to spend my waking hours weeping for him. He deserved better than me. I love him so much it's just breaking my heart that he's out there alone, thinking I abandoned him. I've never felt this level of guilt before. I don't even know what to do with myself.Here's what to do with yourself - Stop beating yourself up. Whatever mistake you may have made was a mistake, an accident. You obviously love the cat dearly, and no one would ever accuse you of being negligent - except for your unforgiving inner voice.

You're going to woulda/coulda/shoulda yourself into an early grave, lady, and your projections of what Boris is thinking, or that you KNOW that he's dead, are not helping.

Others here have had similar experiences with cats returning. Instead of thinking of worst case scenarios, perhaps you can concentrate on possible positive outcomes. You needn't punish yourself over and over with such awful thoughts and grieve for someone who may not be gone yet.

Give Boris - and yourself - some time.

[wolfy999]

What she said ^

[RStar]

Oh, Pru. He could very well be enjoying himself out there. What ever the outcome of this, look for the silver lining. And it may take a little while to find it, it did for me.

Hold out for hope. It's worth it.

And take care of yourself.

~Bob

[Morrigoon]

My brother's cat took off for several days once. Then one day he just sauntered back in, like he'd been on vacation.

[Prudence]

But this isn't like him at all. He's afraid of everything.

I was just out, walking around, and it was so still out there. I was calling his name and nothing. I'm so exhausted, but I'm trying to stay up for him. I have meetings tomorrow I have to attend (about my job (dis)satisfaction - I need to be alert), but how can I put myself above him?

Part of me is tempted to just go to sleep, and let him take care of himself. The other part feels I am obligated to keep searching, stay awake, and keep looking for him.

The worst is that when I'm out there in this stillness - I feel like he's gone. I don't sense him out there. I can't explain it. I can't tall you how much I hope I'm wrong, and that I'm just giving myself the creeps because it's dark and quiet and spooky, but I'm so afraid that he's gone. There's been no response to my calls. Nothing. Maybe we should have looked farther yesterday, but I can't see him crossing these streets. But, then again, I couldn't see him taking off like this, either.

I want to hope, but part of me has accepted him being gone. It's coping, I know. I can't stand to be in this limbo and not know.

[Morrigoon]

I seem to recall him being pretty friendly when we were over last, so he might not be quite as "fraidy" any more.

I assume you did this already, but I'm going to bring it up anyway... did you check the garage?

[Prudence]

So, still no Boris. Yes, we checked the garage. And garages around us (as much as we could). I was up most of the night, and walked around and at 11:30, 12:30, 3:00, and 6:30. The neighborhood was deathly still, but there was no response to my calls.

I'm at the point where I don't know what to do - how much is enough? I'm not sleeping or eating (which means I'm also off meds) and I'm missing chuncks of work. This isn't good. But, I owe it to Boris to do what I can to find him. At what point does it become a needle in a haystack?

I'm actually looking for feedback. Tonight our plan is to go around at about 8:30-9:30 calling his name - not that he would come out, but if he's nearby, he'll know where we are. Then for me to try to get a little sleep. Then around 1am we would both go out and try to figure out attractive middle-of-night cat routes. Also, we may deploy Sasha on a leash. Ever since the first night out, when she came back, she's been itching to get out, especially around midnight. Since she never used to want to go outside, this is new. I don't now if she just loved outside and wants more, or if she knows where he is, or what. But, if they went out together, there's a remote possibility that she'll want to beeline for his hiding hole.

Then we'll do another morning run. And maybe after that, we'll just spend evenings outside, leave out the food and water and shelter, and have to get on with things. Oh, and Ryan will keep talking to neighbors, searching their yards, and visiting the pound during the day.

As you well know, I have no sense of appropriate scope or scale when my own guilt is involved. I don't know if this is an appropriate plan, or if I should be doing more. I don't know if I've been doing too much.

I don't know what Boris was thinking. If he's off having a splendid adventure, he'll not come back until he's ready. If he's dead, he won't be coming back period and nothing I do can change that. If he's far away, it's needle v. haystack and there aren't enough hours in the day for me to cover that ground. If he's nearby, he's heard us every day calling for him. The Rat pointed out that at some point he has to want to come out. If he doesn't want to come out, there are just too many hiding places around us for me to comprehensively search all of them. Plus, there are people who don't want us on their property, crawling around under their house.

Is that reasonable at this point? Keep letting him know where we are (assuming he's out there), but stop the total life disruption? At what point do we close the door at night and let Sasha have *her* space back?

I keep wondering if he was sicker than he was letting on and went off to die and that's why he won't respond. He didn't seem to have gotten perceptibly worse, but he's been diagnosed with CRF for 5-6 years. Or if he was so scared by something that he RAN and is far away now. Last night - it just felt like he wasn't there. Which was probable just my negativeness and the spooky quiet, but still....

Which isn't to say that I've give up hope. I have NOT given up hope. If I had given up hope I would not be spending most of the night sitting outside and walking around, calling for him. I would not be imagining seeing him in his carrier in the morning, or feeling him jump on the bed when I finally doze off in the morning. But, the longer he's gone, the more I wonder why.

If he's dead, I can deal with that. It's the thought of him suffering that has me inconsolable. I can't bear to be the cause of his suffering. It's more than I can live with.

Anyhow, derranged female needs adivce on appropriate scope and course of action.

[Snowflake]

Pru

Is Boris chipped and have you called the local shelters? I'm not sure what else is around you beside the pound the Rat has been checking.

[blueerica]

I understand what you're saying about scope and course of action. I fell in love with a stray in my apartment complex and was devastated with his passing (what could I have done differently, flogging myself, you-name-it). It's hard to live up to ourselves sometimes, especially when it comes to someone we know and love - humans and animals alike... So, unfortunately I might not be as big a help on scope - but I do know that you shouldn't beat yourself up for it.

It sounds to me like you're doing a lot to find him, and hopefully you'll know more soon.

(((Boris & Pru)))

[blueerica]

Oh, and to appropriate course of action: anything you can think of. I don't think there's a too much when it comes to loved ones.

Bonus - you won't have to be as pissed at yourself, so long as you remind yourself that you can't change the past.

[Alex]

I haven't seen you mention it so want to be sure. Have you gone to the animal shelters and looked (as opposed to calling and asking)? Make sure as well that you're checking all the shelters, when Pixel go away we learned that we were actually within a couple hundred feet of a boundary line between to animal control jurisdictions.

Also, I assume it is common practice everywhere (it was true both places I've been involved in looking for animals) but ask if they have a log of animals killed on the road (up here police and animal control file reports on any pet animals retrieved this way; no pictures, just thorough descriptions). As depressing as that idea is, at least it provides an answer.

Finally, make sure you provide posters to the local pet supply stores and all the vets within several miles. If someone else finds Boris and takes him in they'll eventually be visiting one of those (and if Boris did go wandering could be picked up outside your pamphleting coverage).

You can only do what you can do and can't beat yourself up too much. When Pixel got away she was gone for a week and when found she was less than 50 feet from our front door, showed no interest in coming home, and yet had been completely unseen for that week. So don't give up hope but you have to continue with your day-to-day life, being sad but functional.

[Prudence]

Ryan has gone to the shelter every day and looked. All the local areas seem to drop off at that one shelter (already checked jurisdictional issues), but he was already planning to ask if there was another he should check.

Didn't know about log of animals killed - will investigate that.

Boris is chipped - AVID chip. Don't know whether everyone scans for that kind, though. And he was wearing a collar when he left, but of course might not be now.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Sasha on a leash sounds like a great idea. Has she been on one before? Hopefully she can lead you in the right direction.

Definitely eat and sleep, take your meds, and get back into your normal rhythms. There is no need to neglect yourself. You may feel that you owe him the best possible effort to find him, but you're not going to make the best effort if you're all strung out.

Is that reasonable at this point? Keep letting him know where we are (assuming he's out there), but stop the total life disruption? At what point do we close the door at night and let Sasha have *her* space back?I'd say this sounds not only reasonable, but the next step.

[Morrigoon]

You're doing all you can, and more than most people would do. You've chipped him, which is probably the #1 thing you could do for him. He's wearing a collar, so it's no secret that he has an owner somewhere who cares about him, and increases the chances that even a casual cat rescuer will have him scanned.

Cats, being contrarians and all, tend to not appreciate coming home and finding the door closed against them. If Boris is the talkative type, this might be all he needs to start complaining loudly, thus announcing his return. (As opposed to taking it for granted that the door will be waiting for him to return at his leisure).

Mind you, I'm not a cat owner. I've lived with one for a while, but only have his behavior to go off of.

I'm more concerned with how your door came to be open in the first place. Is it the kind of knob/handle a cat could conceivably open by jumping at it? Did local kids possibly open it? Is it not shutting right?

[Prudence]

The door probably wasn't latched completely closed and the wind opened it. The access door to the water heater above the bathroom area frequently comes flying open (and then slams shut) in the wind. We had lots of windows open, allowing for draft.

[Prudence]

Mostly cross-posted from elsewhere:

No Boris this morning. We got up in the middle of the night last night and went around a lot. The Rat is going to print up flyers and hit more neighbors while I'm at work. It was great to run into that elementary school teacher last night - that might help a lot with spreading the word. People have mostly been really nice - calling to see if he's home yet, asking us if he's home yet when we're out walking, reassuring us that they're keeping their eyes open for him.

Mornings are the hardest for me. I spend the day getting increasingly hopeful that he will come home that night. By bedtime, I nearly manage to convince myself that he'll be there in the morning. In the morning, he's not there and I'm so sad that I haven't found a word that is powerful enough to encompass the scope of my sadness.

Wherever he is, I don't want him to suffer. If he doesn't want to come home, for whatever reason, if he wants things to end, I hope they end swiftly. If he's already dead, I hope it was painless. But what I hope most of all is that he comes back soon, worn out from adventure and ready to spend some quality time in my lap.

****
We're going to continue to talk to neighbors and spend evenings outside. And probably still sleep with the door open. (The Rat sleeps in the living room to guard against whatever, and I sleep with Sasha locked up in the bedroom, which she doesn't seem to mind at all. In fact, she spent the whole night on the bed with me, which is really unusual for her.) The Rat's mom gets here next week for a few nights, so then the door will have to shut. That will make about 1.5 weeks, so probably a good time for closure.

[Betty]

I was so hopeful that your post would have better news. Kitty please come home.

[blueerica]

We're going to continue to talk to neighbors and spend evenings outside. And probably still sleep with the door open. (The Rat sleeps in the living room to guard against whatever, and I sleep with Sasha locked up in the bedroom, which she doesn't seem to mind at all. In fact, she spent the whole night on the bed with me, which is really unusual for her.) The Rat's mom gets here next week for a few nights, so then the door will have to shut. That will make about 1.5 weeks, so probably a good time for closure.

That sounds like a good plan.

[Not Afraid]

I would not give up hope. Cats tend to find their way home. It does concern me that he doesn't have his meds.

I completely understand the emptiness you feel. I would feel the same way.

[Prudence]

No Boris sightings yet - but an update on Things Being Done - posted here because I'm at work any anything else useful is blocked.

Talked to my old vet today -- she's only in on Fridays, so that's why I didn't call her sooner. She made me promise that immediately after hanging up I would log on to findtoto.com and purchase their services. For a not inconsiderable fee, it's an automated telemarketing thing that calls a certain number of neighbors in a radius around the lost location. Price is based on the number of calls. I, of course, immediately paid the sum requested, because I'm desperate. For future lost pets - might be a useful resource. If I'd known about them Monday, you can bet I would have called then; they claim an 85% return rate for calls made within the first 48 hours. I can't possibly knock on all the doors the calls will reach. It will probably piss off neighbors, but I don't care.

She also said to keep looking, which I was going to do anyway. I wish the little bugger would show up already.

[Betty]

What an interesting service and great idea.

[RStar]

Good luck Pru. I share your pain, and pray for a completion.

[Prudence]

Look who JUST got home! And is acting like nothing was amiss.

1134

Seriously - we've been sleeping with the front door open - so he could come back in while we slept, we hoped. Ryan was sleeping on the air matress in the living room -to protect us from intruders - and I was sleeping locked up in the bedroom. At 4:28 I heard a scratching at the bedroom door. I eventually cleared my head enough to realize that Sasha was asleep on the bed, so it wasn't her trying to get out. I was still too groggy - couldn't figure out HOW to find my glasses, not just not able to find them, I didn't even know how I should start looking - so I just went to the door and opened it. In the dark, I couldn't really tell if there was anything there. I almost just closed the door. Then I could just make out a shape. Was it him? I couldn't tell. So I reached out a hand -- it was SOMEthing all right.... Held down with one hand while I felt for the tail in the other. Ran my hand up and down it in disbelief.....

And threw him on the bedroom, shut the door. and ran screaming something I don't even remember to wake up Ryan.

He is eating, drink, acting like nothing is wrong or unusual AT all, and Sasha is disgruntled that he's back.

My heart is pounding so hard and fast.



WHERE THE HELL WAS HE ALL WEEK?

[Morrigoon]

Yay kitty!

[Moonliner]

Woohoo! :snap:

[Kevy Baby]

Happy returns!

Can you sleep now?

[Snowflake]

Yay for Boris and don't you wish he could tell you all about his true life adventure

[Betty]

:snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap: :snap:
Yeah Baby!!! Hell Yeah! I'm so happy for all of you guys.

Boris! You are a naughty kitteh! Where have you been young man???

[Mousey Girl]

YEAH!!!!

I am so happy for you!

[flippyshark]

Bad Kitty! Good Kitty!! Baaad Kitty!! Gooood Kittyyyy!!!


That was the best possible thing to read first thing in the morning. YAY!

[Not Afraid]

"I was just out adventuring, Mom. It was fun!"

[innerSpaceman]

Yay! This just made my morning so happy!


Pru, please request the mods to change the title of this thread. I know some people fear to click for the sadness that was here. The happy news should be announced. :)

[DreadPirateRoberts]

:)

[wolfy999]

He went on vacation and now he's relaxed and ready to settle down again. No more vacations Mr. Boris!

[blueerica]

HURRAY!!

[mousepod]

I'm a sucker for happy endings.

[wendybeth]

Wow, great news!!!! I am so happy for you, and your naughty boy! He actually looks pretty good- wonder if he was mooching off the neighbors?

:)

[Strangler Lewis]

(Old lady from Madagascar voice): Mr. Boris, you a bad keety!

[Tom]

Very happy for all concerned!

[Gn2Dlnd]

That is one big cat.

[~MS~]

awwwwww I've been checking this thread and saying prayers all along, so glad he came home safe and no worse for wear apparently!

[LSPoorEeyorick]

Thank goodness for good news! I'm relieved.

[Motorboat Cruiser]

That is friggin' awesome news! Very happy for you!

[JWBear]

Yay!!!!!

[€uroMeinke]

Woohoo for Boris! Glad he came back safe.

[ToriBear]

Yay!!!! The kitty is safe and sound! I wonder where he was all week?

[Nephythys]

Hip Hip HUZZAH!

Happy happy!

[Ghoulish Delight]

Oh the stories he could tell. I smell a new Pixar movie!

[Betty]

Oh the stories he could tell. I smell a new Pixar movie!

That's actually a great idea ya know.

[Cadaverous Pallor]

Looks like Boris has proved himself no fraidy cat after all.

I'm so glad you have him back. :)

[Andrew]

So glad Boris is back. How long are you grounding him for? No TV?

[Prudence]

Boris is on double secret probation until the end of time. I am grinning like an idiot today. Sasha is pissed and keeps biting us. But I think she'll calm down - they had been starting to sleep snuggled up sometimes, so she can't hate him that much. I don't have the foggiest idea where he has been all week. He doesn't have any signs of fighting or injuries. He did lose almost 2 pounds, so he likely wasn't roaming around the neighborhood and visiting the various feeding stations. But other than the weightloss, and the fact that he's a bit dirty, he seems totally fine. Much better than I would have expected spending 5 days without his thyroid meds. He's just chillin' out here, doing his usual routine.

My baby is home!

And now we have met all of our neighbors. All of them. We stop, chat on the street - I live in an extremely friendly neighborhood. Everyone gossips about everyone else - but in a nice way. We are apparently the quiet couple that no one knew much about. Now, they know more about us. And vice-y verse-y.

Sitting here with the snoozin' cat it feels almost like last week never happened.

[€uroMeinke]

So Boris decided it was time to introduce you to your neighbors ;)

[keith - SuPeR K!]

I'm glad to hear Boris has returned home :)

[Gemini Cricket]

Tell him no more running away or you'll sell him to the nearest meat market.
:D

Glad Boris has returned, Pru.
:)

[katiesue]

I'm so glad he finally decided to come home, and not much worse for the wear.

[lashbear]

so how long before the first Paternity Suits come in.... ;)

[Melonballer]

LOL Lashbear.

Congratulations. I am glad to hear that he came home.

[SzczerbiakManiac]

That wonderful news. I'll admit, my eyes got a little full after I read he was safe at home. :)

[alphabassettgrrl]

Good kitty come home! How nice that you got to meet your neighbors! :)