Everyones defination of "too soon" is different. Black humor is a coping mechanisam. It may be too soon for you, but not too soon for GD.

Not trying to deminish your feelings or thoughts, just pointing out the other side.

I can't hate him. If what I've read is true the man is sick; cut his flesh and stab himself sick. I can't excuse what he's done though.

I was just teasing GD, I'm a very close friend of the humor that is known as Black.

Once you are parked on the train tracks, it is pretty clear that one is not thinking things through properly. I can't hate him anymore than I hate the woman who drowned her children in Texas. I don't see malice or intent, just a lack of the ability to cope and act rationally, sometimes with horrific consequences. That is what is so frustrating about mental illness, that there is no rhyme or reason to it and usually by the time it is fully recognized, it is too late.

But, like you, I can't just give the guy a free pass either. Too many innocent people had their lives shattered by his actions. He must not be given the opportunity to endanger anyone else, at least not for a good long time.

I'm sorry that sounded like an accusation. And I realize it did. It was supposed to be a statement of what "I" can't allow myself to do.

I think my problem is I need something/someone to blame. But we don't always get that, do we?

Being liberal has nothing to do with how you are feeling dear- I relate, and we all know how conservative I am.

Oh, and I DO hate Andrea Yates and will forever- that event haunts me to this day......God can forgive her, I won't.

I was sitting in a computer room at Fort Lee, VA when I heard that news and my hate was hotter that white.

But I realize now she was sick (and I'm not making excuses for any of the people who knew her and saw what was going on and did nothing). I happen to believe that somebody could have intervened here. But was Andrea capable on intervening on her own behalf?

And though I don't believe the bible is the proper foundation on which to base our government, I do know and cherish a lot of its teachings.

I can't hate her.

I hate to say it, mine still is. I know too many details about what happened in that home that day- the little boy who said I'm sorry mommy, what did I do? as the bitch was drowning him- the way she chased him through the house and dragged him to that tub. May God have mercy on me for hating her- I just can't....can't move past it.

She planned it- she waited til the moment between her husband leaving and her mother coming over. This was a deliberate act- every murder takes some sort of sickness, but this.....defies anything I can imagine. I also hold her husband responsible.

More power to you- My rage for her, the one who smashed her kids heads in with rocks, and the woman who cut her little girls arms off- they have a special place in hell as far as I am concerned-along with every other mother (or father)who kills their children. I hate two things- bigots and people who hurt children- of all the precious things in the world, we should protect our children.

Maybe I will work through the hate eventually.....

I can understand how that would haunt you so and can understand the reasons for your hatred. I won't tell you shouldn't hate her. You have that right.

I can't go there though. Perhaps it is my experience witnessing someone very close to me that went through a horrible depression, one that didn't have a happy ending. I've seen how a chemical imbalance can change a person so much so that you don't feel that you know them at all and they have no ability to rationally think things through like you or I might be able to. I remember pleading with this person to just talk to someone on a professional level, knowing that there was help available for them but they refused. In their way of thinking, they hadn't changed, everyone else had.

The system failed Andrea Yates miserably. She slipped through the cracks and even her husband failed to get her the help she needed. There had to be plenty of warning signs there and they should have been acted on. She should have never been left alone with those children, not for a moment.

I just wanted to say that I think it's admirable that SMcS can't find it in himself to hate this guy nor the Yates lady. I can't either. These two people need hospitalization, medication and guarded access to other people.