That says it all :)

Quite thought provoking, actually.

Perhaps, then, suicide involves self absorption rather than selfishness. (ona side note, I had to edit for spelling....who would have thought that absorb becomes absorption???? Learn something new every day.)

I think "Selfishness" is an external judgement others place upon your actions. Your internal motivations be they self absorption, thoughtlessness or even well meaning are largely irrelevant to a judgement of "Selfishness" by others.

is it selfish then or malicious (hurtful to others)?

It's very sad that this man felt he had no other options.

Free will: "I can do anything I want to do."

In the end, aren't all acts selfish at the core? Every decision we make is the synthesis of all of our competing needs and wants, resulting in performing the action that carries the most self satisfaction, or the least self dissatisfaction. Even an outwardly "selfless" act requires the actor to WANT to perform it.

I don't agree that selfishness necessarily is a purposeful hurtful act towards someone else. It can simply by a complete lack of account for others. I think we've all had moments where we're distracted by our own problems that we temporarily forget to consider others, I don't find it too hard to imagine that getting to the point where your thoughts are so clouded and distracted that nothing else makes it through.

In the end, I'm skeptical that all suicides can be boiled down to a single word like "selfish" or "malicious" or "cowardly". The only thing I know they have in common that doesn't require being in the person's head is "sad".

I disagree. I do so many things I don't want to because they are the right thing to do or they are beneficial to someone else. I have no desire to throw wiffle balls so my son can practice batting EVERY STINKING DAY FOR THE LAST 3 WEEKS. But I do.

However, I will admit that often times doing things I don't want to do are a direct result of things I do want to do. For example, I don't want to go to work, but I do want to feed my family.

I think there are two types of selfishness - that which intentionally hurts others and that which doesn't. I completely think the latter is fine.

And note I say "intentionally" in this case. To me, a person committing suicide knows damn well it will negatively affect others. Even if the person is a total jerk whose demise might be celebrated, but it still affects the people who have to clean up or witness the mess. I think that's a "bad" selfish.

In the case of say, showing up early for a good parade spot, which then blocks the view of people who choose to arrive later, is a perfectly "fine" selfish act in my book. However, vice versa - being shoved out of the way by latecomers is "bad" selfish on their part because they know the other people have been obviously waiting a longer time for that spot.

Does that make sense?

But you have the free will not to. You choose to because, balancing everything out, your want for your son to have fun and love you outweighs your want to not toss the ball. In the end, the balance of the equation has you doing what you want to. You always have the choice not to, it's just a question of what price you're willing to pay not to. Which is just another want.

Exactly my point.

I've heard depression described before as "a cult of one," and I find that very appropriate. I think it's perfectly reasonable to assume that someone that commits suicide is so deep into depression that they consider their death a good thing for all involved. I've heard people say who have been in that spot before that they felt that their mere presence was toxic.