A woman after my own heart.


Titanic was a never-ending bore.

One of the unfulfilled cinema yearnings of my youth is Raise The Titanic, a thriller from 1980 that had great poster art and a hype campaign that had me going. The reviews were awful, I didn't see it, and it has been elusive as far as video. I'm sure if I ever catch up with it, it will be a non event, but I do remember being awfully excited about it at one time.

That was the very first book that I ever read that was not an assigned school reading. Began a life-long love of Clive Cussler.

Don't bother. Read the book instead. Trust me on this one.

I liked it. I thought the sinking was very well done. The sounds were incredible, and very creepy.

Dear All,

Ok...that does it. No excuses - California made it, sold it and (by most of your accounts sunk it).

Please send the $300 million dollar refund check to:
The Stoat,
Australia in the World.

Upon receipt of the cheque, I will buy the LoT it's own movie studio on the Queensland Sunshine Coast. It will be named "Wanna Bros", which will have a large entry gate and big tin sheds for filming.

Due to Oz water restrictions, there will be no water-themed movies allowed, which will save you from further large-budgetted flops, fat ladies drowning from heart attacks, and similar water-related catas...castra...cotsra...things that go wrong in water.

Love and hugs,

The Stoat XXX.

Don't make me have to do my Shelley Winters impression again, Stoat.

I'm still waiting for the recipe...

Ahhhh...mon cherry, but you are the discerning one. You did see through my dust storm of watery flops...the screen other than the silvery one that has bored many an audience and been coated in tomato with relish...or is that without?

You have persisted - indeed insisted - and so you shall be rewarded my little "chew pastry of the ayclare" [sic]. Certainmont.

As soon as I can find the fornicating recipe for "Titanic Pie" it will be yours for the wild consumption - but even better, you should try making the pie from the instructions it contains.

Love and hugs,

The Stoat XXX.

I think I need a Stoat-English translating dictionary.