Nope. A fat person, by definition, is less attractive than if that same person was not fat. Less Attractive is not the same as Ugly.

And just to clarify, I'm talking about physical attractiveness.
Nope. A skinny person is presumed to be less unattractive than if that same person was fat. Skinny does not equal attractive.

Prudence, while it's impossible to get an accurate reading on one's true feelings via text, I get the impression the nature of this discussion is quite emotional for you and it may be coloring your judgement of the situation. If you'll forgive the unsolicited advice, you might want to take a few steps back, wait a while, and come back when you've had some time to ruminate on the topic. We're you're friends here and I'm positive nobody is attacking you.

ok, was gonna stay out of the rest of this but this is just outright wrong.
BY DEFINITION: attractiveness is totally subjective, fat, skinny, black white, green....5 heads or a long scaley tail......please dont attempt to define attractiveness. YOU cannot do so for anyone but YOURSELF.

"A skinny person is presumed to be less unattractive than if that same person was fat. "
what an entirely over the top generalization that I have to say I resent. Please, dont speak for me on such a subject.

Oh Jack.. I dont think thats what he meant.

Take a deep breath and hang in there. I have never met Sz.. but I think I can say that in no way is that what he was trying to do.

.

And why the hell wouldn't I be emotional? A bunch of people I thought I might be friends with some day are outright advocating employment decisions based on weight -- not because of the objective requirements of the position, but because they'd rather look at skinny people.

Theme park employees should be hotties, because that's what you're paying to go see. Wait staff should be hotties, because that's why you eat out. Receptionists should be hotties because they're the face of the company. And so it goes. If you indulge in that thinking, then regardless of the field or position there is ALWAYS a reason to hire the hottie and not, well, me. If I had a dollar for everytime a prospective employer told me that I just "didn't project the right image...." -- because goodness knows one wants the backroom file clerk to project the right image. But hey, given the choice between the skinny applicant and the fat applicant, why not hire the skinny one? After all, they'll be better to look at day after day.

Obviously it's "the way things are." I experience it every day. However, that doesn't meant that I have to passively accept it, let alone personally perpetuate it.

But I still have to wonder -- if y'all feel that strongly about looking at hot bodies when you're out and about, why would you voluntarily associate with those you know don't make the grade? The message here has been pretty clear -- given the choice, people would rather look at skinny people. There is nothing so fabulous about my personality that would make up for my appearance. I'm not able to shower my friends with riches. Just a big lump of fat with a person somewhere deep down inside.

You're absolutely right! I can't dictate you what you or any specific person feels. I can report on national averages, or even overwhelming majorities though. When speaking about matters of personal taste, it's inherent in the subject that individual tastes will vary. I sort of figured we were all hip to that and that it didn't need to be mentioned.

To put it a different way, I have never said that every single person in the country likes the taste of chocolate. Obviously some people don't like it, may be allergic to it, etcetera. But it's obvious to pretty much everyone, chocolate is very, very popular. So if I make an egregious generalization that people love chocolate, to me it's assumed that there are exceptions to the rule that are so obvious, they don't need to be stated.
By all means, resent it as much as you like. Your or my resentment of a generalization does not change the fact that the generalization may, in fact, be accurate.

fair enough.

I wont debate the accuracy (the lack thereof?) of most generalizations but I will indeed apologize for the rather heated reply to something taken (obviously) totally out of context.

my bad
*flashes a peace sign*

Yeah, I'm one of those freaks who are actually allergic to chocolate, and if someone claims that everyone loves the stuff, I understand the distinction. So let's not get all picky on the common-sensical assumption that Person A would be a more attractive Person A if they were a thin Person A rather than a fat Person A.

I would be a more attractive Person B if I were a taller Person B. It's a generalization, yes. But let's not get absurd in pointing out the exceptions. Obviously, there are people who find me attractive (hi there, zappp sweetie) at my little boy height.


* * * * *

Prudence, when I posted about apples and oranges, I meant we shouldn't confuse a hiring situation with a casting situation. Casting almost always involves the matter of matching physical appearance to the perceived requirements of a role.

I would never support hiring based on the same requirements. I don't know why, for instance, restaurants might hire cutie waiters as a preference. I don't see how it makes them more money ... but they have a right to think otherwise. My own hiring practices would be different if I owned a restaurant.

If I owned Disneyland, however, there would still be that scale behind the desk at City Hall.


Please don't presume to dictate that I must equate my casting practices with my friendship practices. You are way off base with that assumption. I am not selling widgets when I engage in friendships.

I agree completely. You should judge people based on their insides not their outsides. And yes society as a whole is quite judgmental. Not everyone is a size 6 blonde double D. But lots of the hottest guys/gals when you really start taking into account looks only - aren't always the perfect looking ones. It's the imperfections and personality shining through that makes them attractive to others.

I didn't say you shouldn't be emotional. I suggested your emotions may be coloring your judgement. Here's one example of why I think that:None has actually said that. Here's what was said: (I added the emphasis)Do you see what I mean? iSm said one thing and you extrapolated that to be something else. Your emotions, valid as they maybe, appear to be making you see something that's not there.
I'm going to put this in spoiler text because I know a lot of people are going to HATE to see it. Do not open the box if you are easily offended. (I am not kidding, open at your own risk.!)

Because we like you, silly—and don't forget it! Life and friendships aren't just about getting aroused from looking at a hottie. Believe it or not, the vacuous masses here on the LoT can see past physical appearances. And speaking as a fat, bald, and (physically) ugly person, I'm glad they do. I don't give a flying fück if someone at a Park meet is eye-candy. I care that they are fun to hang out with. You, my dear, fit the bill quite nicely.

[hugs]