I once lost out on a penmanship medal I thought should be mine so I drowned the winner in a lake during a school picnic.

Makes sense. Sounds like the right thing to do.

So Alex is Rhoda Penmark... that explains a lot.

Seems like the kid needs a serenade from my favorite TV dad. (Seriously, if you aren't watching this show, you should be.)

I suppose you could slather his arms in bitter apple to discourage future biting, lol. (not really)

The bite happened earlier in the day.
He landed facedown next to the slide, and when he got up, there was blood on his forehead and the palms of his hands.

He actually thought it was pretty cool, and started getting in trouble for purposefully jumping from the side of the slide.

We've kept in touch through the years, and he is a stuntman; specializing in high falls and fighting.

That's a nice outcome. I went on to kill the handyman.

I think I know how this story ends.

Damn. The Universe is a very odd place.

My 12 year old long haired son (several inches past his shoulders and is mistaken for a girl frequently as a result long) got a hair cut. What a good looking kid hidden under all that hair!