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13 Books "No One" Has Read
Did you see the list of novels people claim they've read but no one actually has? I thought it might be fun to run it down here.
The list: The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville Ulysses by James Joyce A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie Moby Dick by Herman Melville Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco Don Quixote by Cervantes War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner |
I actually have read four of those.
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I am only at three.
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I haven't read "Hamlet", either
The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer
Yes and somewhere in my basement I have an old lp of highlights read in the correct pronunciation. You're so attracted to that, aren't you. Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville Blech, no. Ulysses by James Joyce I should. A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens Yes but only once because it was assigned. Since I am practically contemporaneous with Bob Cratchitt, this was a really long time ago. The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie No and probably never will. Moby Dick by Herman Melville Life is too short to read this book. Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace Barely even heard of it. A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking No and I heart physicists but ... no. Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust YES! and en français as Dieu intended. All the volumes. I used to have a poster of a diagrammed Proust sentence in my office. That and the Chaucer record make you want me, don't they. The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco Yes. Loved it, loved the movie. Don Quixote by Cervantes Most unread classic there is. If it were from France, I would have read it. Since it is from Spain, I have not. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy Not from France, either. Plus, three times I have tried to read Crime and Punishment and three times I have given up in boredom. No Russian novels. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner No but I loved "The Sound and the Fury". I should read this one. |
A lot of Canterbury Tales, about a third of Don Quixote, all of Christmas Carol, Moby Dick, The Name of the Rose and A Brief History of Time (which is short and painless, so there's no reason not to read it). Haven't read War and Peace yet, but I kind of want to. Same with Satanic Verses. Not on this list, but I've been through the unabridged Les Miserables twice.
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I've always been a big reader and never read most of the above (though of course I am familiar with most of them from movie versions or via discussions elsewhere).
I've been through the not-on-this-list unabridged Les Miserables (back in junior high school!). I'm interested in reading the Satanic Verses (mostly because of the controversy, and because I just heard about it again on Christopher Hutchins' "God is not great:How religion poisons everything." I've started Moby Dick but never finished. And you couldn't pay me to read A Christmas Carol or anything else by Charles Dickens. So boring. (Well, I take that back, you COULD pay me, lol). |
Hawking's History of Time does not belong on that list. It is completely accessible, IMHO. If you're even partially interested, go for it.
I read Satanic Verses in high school. I was a library TA and someone donated the book to the library. The librarian didn't add it to the collection, mostly because we had very little room to add anything. My interest was peaked due to the controversy, so I borrowed it and sped through it without understanding one lick of it. Christmas Carol was ok. Tried multiple times to read Quixote, couldn't get far. Read about half of Moby Dick but eventually realized I had no interest at all in continuing. The rest I never even felt like trying. |
Call me Ishmael
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I've read six, and parts of three others. (Satanic Verses, Remembrance and Ulysses). A Christmas Carol is one of my favorite stories, although it's not a not a novel technically.
Don Quixote, much like Candide, has a special place in my mind. Hardly a week goes by when someone or something happens that reminds me of either book. A lot of the books listed were required reading in HS and college, but Hawking and Tolstoy are both authors I very much enjoy reading, even if quite a bit of Hawking's material is difficult for me to truly comprehend. I also loved Carl Sagan, and have nearly all of his published works. I wish they'd been my science instructors- I would have liked science a good deal more in school. |
Oh how I love Candide.
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7 read 3 started 3 nos |
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I've read small portions of the Canterbury Tales, and I've read Ulysses, though I don't remember a lick of it.
I HAVE read both the Odyssey (twice) AND the Illiad. |
3 - Satanic Verses, Moby Dick, and Name of the Rose - I enjoyed 2 of the 3
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Hmm, I wasn't assigned these, so here are some that I was assigned that I couldn't get through.
Pride and Prejudice Crime and Punishment Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man There are tons more that I can't remember. On the other hand, I loved Shakespeare (Macbeth, Hamlet, Julius Caesar, Much Ado About Nothing), Lord of the Flies, and, my mind just went blank....there are more on this list too. |
Cliff Notes got me through British Lit in high school.
I love to read but I hated nearly every book we had to read. |
I love 'Pride and Prejudice'- have it on my nightstand now. :)
I love Russian history and lit as well. 'The Death of Ivan Ilyich' is one of the best novellas ever written, IMHO. Dostoevsky can be a hard slog- I think Tolstoy is much easier to read, although Dostoevsky is pretty good at depicting madness and desperation in his characters, and he offers a strong glimpse into the customs, mores and daily lives of the pre-Revolution citizenry. |
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And I want to read 'War and Peace'. |
Of course, since this is supposedly a list of books people most often lie about having read, this entire thread is immediately suspect.
The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer - No,and no interest in doing so. Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville - Yes, and I've read Volume 1 twice. Ulysses by James Joyce - No. A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens - I find Dickens to be essentially unreadable. The very embodiment of the horror that is Victorian novels. And I've given him many chances since my favorite prof in college was a Dickens scholar and I wanted to be able to kiss his ass. But it wasn't worth the pain. However, A Christmas Carol is so short I was able to get through it. The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie - No. Moby Dick by Herman Melville - Significant parts but I've never made it to the end. Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace - No, no interest based on other stuff of his I've read. A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking - Yes. Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust - No. The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco - No. Don Quixote by Cervantes - I've read the first third about a dozen times and never make it farther. And since everything that popular culture knows about Don Quixote happens in that first third, I assume nobody else ever gets any farther either. But that part is pretty good. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy - Yes. Crime and Punishment is perhaps the best novel of all time so I disagree with the comment above, but I did make it through War and Peace. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner - No. Does anybody actually read any Faulkner any more? |
Oh, while my skills are self-taught (having written many well graded papers through college on book and texts I'd never even opened) others may find this book helpful:
How to Talk About Books You Haven't Read by Pierre Bayard |
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However, having a passing knowledge of the classics DOES make A Series of Unfortunate Events more enjoyable/funny. :)
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Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville Never read it but I would be interested. The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie Interested. I think we have a copy around here somewhere. As I remember it, from paging through, it was kind of boring. From all the controversy, I expected more. A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking Definitely read this one! He's great! I have a few books of this theme on my shelves. The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco Yep, read this one. The one book I was assigned as a kid that I just couldn't finish was "Treasure Island" by Stevenson. Just could not stand it. Might be more palatable now, but then? Ugh. I'd read a lot of books, and it was a point of pride that I'd finished all of them, but this one killed me. |
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It's a bummer when classic adventure stories disappoint. Robinson Crusoe is another one. H.G. Wells never worked well for me either, though I did get through them. Whenever books, movies, etc refer to reading along with your favorite characters (the beginning of Neverending Story comes to mind, with the old man mentioning Treasure Island etal) I always think "but those stories are sooo boring!" Perhaps in 100 years Harry Potter will seem boring too. |
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I can picture some hapless student some decades from now. "I'm supposed to read how many pages?!? |
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I don't read anything that doesn't start with "Dear Penthouse Forum..."
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Which, unexpectedly, means three things on the list remain possible for you.
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I think I read A Christmas Carol in high school.
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I've read The Cantebury Tales (in middle english, tyvm), A Christmas Carol (although another Dickens book is the only assigned text I never finished), The Name of the Rose, and A Brief History of Time (on my own, because my dad took me to see Hawking give a lecture and I wanted to be prepared.)
I have War and Peace on my to read list, but I also hated Crime and Punishment, so I've been wary of Russian novels. Although I like Chekov, so I should really give it a go. |
I was a literature major but I only read two of these books for school.
Ulysses - I read this with another book that commented on everything chapter by chapter. That helped and I really enjoyed it. A Christmas Carol - I've read this multiple times. It's the essence of Christmas for me. The Satanic Verses - I read another Rushdie book and it was such a chore to get through that I don't think I can try another one. Moby Dick - No, I had a choice between this and The Scarlet Letter in high school and picked The Scarlet Letter because it was shorter. (I didn't appreciate The Scarlet Letter until I read it again recently.) A Brief History of Time - I love science books that I can almost understand. Remembrance of Things Past - I've read the whole thing 1.9 times (just couldn't bring myself to finish it the second time). I've read the Combray intro to Swann's Way many, many times. It's beautiful music. The Name of the Rose - Read it. Don Quixote - I read an abridged version for a class and loved it. Always wanted to go back and read the whole thing, never did. I refuse to read William Faulkner or Ernest Hemingway. |
I actually picked up a copy of the Satanic Verses at the library thanks to this thread and have read the first 30 pages... it isn't unintelligible (yet) ;)
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I didn't find it unintelligible either- just uninteresting. Maybe now that things have gotten so much wackier in the Islamic world (or that I'm just that much more aware of said wackiness) I might change my mind......
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I really enjoyed Satanic Verses, but I'm a fan of magical realism and contemporary Indian fiction.
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I've read all of War and Peace, all of A Christmas Story(twice), and about a third of Moby Dick.
No intention of finishing Moby Dick....ever...no intention of reading any of those other books or re-reading War and Peace; But I read at least one Dickens book every couple years and sooner or later I'll be back around to the story of Mr. Scrooge:) |
Wow, I am so far gone I could not tell you if I had read any of them or not . . . I went on a several year long "dead female author" kick right out of college that turned off what memory I ever did have . . .
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