File Under Not Swanky
 

I thought Ass Pants - those wonderfull pants with clever statements across one's ass marked the nadir of unswankiness.

Unfortunately, I must report - there is a lower point. At the market the other day was a woman wearing "Crotch Pants" written in a funky script were the words "SEX SEA" written across her groin.

I now wonder if I should go out, buy a bunch of sweats and silk screen the words "camel Toe" across their front sides and at least cash in on this trend.

Oh, my mind's eye! Ouch!

Yeah, go for the "camel toe" idea -- might as well. Gals these days: no self-respect! And now, after typing that, I feel like I'm truly old.

omg.

It's going to take a lot of restraint on my part to not walk up to someone wearing a pair and say "Excuse me. Did you really want me to look at your crotch? Really? I just want to know." I'd stay in their face until they gave me an actual answer.

Maybe they just put their ass pants on backwards.

That of course was my original suspicion - but as I gazed at this woman's crotch trying to read it's message (as one's lap is usually much less of a billboard than one's ass) it was clear that they were intended to be worn that way.

Maybe that's the best approach, rather than talking to them - just stand there and stare at their crotch for a long period of time. You could even walk right up to them, stand close enough for conversation, and stare until they get uncomfortable.

With the words "Sex Sea" written there, I might have to say "So there's salt water in your cooch?" :eek: :evil:

Or, "if I put my ear in your crotch would I hear the ocean?"

All I can say to this is "EW" Hard to believe fashion nonsense can sink any lower, and yet it still exceeds my low expectations!

I'm grateful to remember I am not 18-20 and don't suffer from peer pressure to be trendy (not that I ever have actually been trendy, mind you).

Donna

Yes! I don't mind trends for what they are but they have to go through my decerning mind's eye.

As far as the body writing trend, I'm actually grateful that these poor people provide me with something I can laugh at without feeling bad. about it. I could care less what they choose to wear, but in doing so, they make it open season on snickering.

Or, "Are you advertising to all the sailors out there you'll do them?".

Why am I now singing "Got a whale of a tale to tell you lads......."

"So, have you found Nemo?"

"I SMELLS FISH!!!"

"So, that's what happened to the Devil's Triangle."

"Try lemon juice."

"Look, Ariel's Grotto!"

"Yeah, and it looks like your seat cushion would work as a flotation device."

"Hey baby, my submarine is (say it together with me now) longer and harder, with more seamen than ever!"

"Did I mention that my nickname is the Commodore, and I can pilot my own dinghy?"

"Hey, nice püssy-pants."

Faaaabulous, Commodore! :snap:

or just find crabs?

Funniest. Thread. Ever.

At least the ink isn't "Scratch 'n Sniff" :eek:

I don't know how I missed this one before but thanks for the laughs!