Jury Duty
 

Ken had to report for jury duty this morning, but we really want him to be excused, because Target doesn't pay for it, and the financial impact of him not being paid would really suck.

So, he decided to show up wearing black pants, his button-down Azkaban shirt (complete with "inmate number" on the front), and a really large black pentacle pendant that I found last year in Tijuana. If it hadn't been 80 degrees outside, he also would have worn his black velvet longcoat, and did the whole "interview with a vampire" image. We're hoping it works. (Although, I just now realize I forgot to have him take a copy of the "Necronomicon" with him - that might have sealed the deal alone.)

What creative things have you done to get excused?

Actually, if Target doesn't compensate for Jury Duty, couldn't he have gotten a letter from his manager claiming financial hardship?

I'm a contractor and my company does not compensate for Jury Duty so my manager wrote a letter on company letterhead stating that my only source of income is my job and they don't compensate for Jury Duty and I'd have to take a loss in pay to serve on the Jury.

I submitted the letter with the questionairre thing they send and never heard back from them.

I understand that liberal use of the word "Redrum" on the jury questionnaire can get you out of jury duty.

Also a simple request to the judge requesting to be placed on a trial with a defendant that's black,hispanic,jewish, christian or <insert your choice of race or religion>, cuz everyone knows them type is always guilty should do the trick.

Best of luck to FP in avoiding his civic duty :p

aparrently, so can mentioning the NRA :blush:

go figure

So I'm guessing you are not in Virginia or Texas?

heh. uh...no.

hey, they asked!

According to Orange County, he'd have to present hardship directly to the judge who would make the final decision.

During my last round of jury duty, a woman in our group presented a letter, her paycheck, and her low-income monthly budget, and the judge still made her go through with it. :(

Most judges are pretty accommodating about financial hardship, particularly if a long trial is involved. On the other hand, judges can be a persnickety lot, so I wouldn't go too far in offending courtroom decorum or lying on the juror questionnaire. I'm sure the employer won't pay for a contempt citation either. I also don't think I'd wear anything that remotely looked like prison clothes in an environment crawling with law enforcement that's adjacent to a jail.

"Why would they have been arrested if they aren't guilty?"

I've never gone in for jury duty. The only time I've actually received anything beyond the questionaire was when L.A. county sent me a summons several years after I moved away and registered in O.C. (even though I had sent the questionaire back telling them I had moved).

I've been summoned twice, and the first time I got a waiver because Tori was sick. (Tha's when she lost her hearing). The next time was for Superior Court, and I had to keep my schedule clear for a month. The good thing was they had to give you ten days notice, the bad thing was I was given notice midway through the month. Luckily, the trial was cancelled one day before it was due to start. If I had served on a jury in SC, I would have been paid something like $45 a day, as opposed to the lesser court's cheap rate of $10. That's the sad thing about jury duty- I think most people would do it, but they can't afford the financial hit. The only ones in that courtroom losing money are the defendants and the jurors.:rolleyes:

You have a better chance of getting quickly excused for cause by saying that if you turn yourself into an "Asian gentleman," because the system sort of recognizes that Asians are hopelessly pro prosecution to a degree that will not survive appellate review.

If you're a white guy and you say that, the judge will remind you that he instructs the jury that the fact of an arrest is not evidence of guilt. He will remind you of the presumption of innocence, which you will sheepishly acknowledge as a cornerstone of our system. He will tell you that the prosecution will put on its case and you might conclude that they didn't do a good job. He will then ask you, white man, if you'd be willing to listen to the evidence before making up your mind. You'll say, "Oh, yeah, I'd want to hear the evidence." The judge will then deny the challenge for cause. Defense counsel will then kick you off with a peremptory challenge unless he's used them up on people who seem far worse than you.

As a white guy, you stand a better chance of getting quickly excused for cause by using a variant of the above: that you work with/know people in law enforcement, have a huge mancrush on them, and would believe anything they say without question.

I got picked for a jury once. (A murder trial!) During voir dire I was asked if I knew anyone in law enforcement. I mentioned the name of an Assistant DA I knew at the time. The defense attorney dismissed me almost before I finished the sentence. :D

Damn. If only I had made this thread yesterday.

He got picked. :(

Fortunately, it's just a DUI case, expected to last only through tomorrow.

I work within the SF Sheriff's Dept. I am constantly getting jury summonses (the way it works here in SF County is that each time a summons is sent out, it is the obligation of the potential juror to prove that he served within the past year). I've been picked to serve on a jury twice - as an alternate for a criminal case and an actual juror for a civil. During voir dire, I've explained that I work in a jail & my Mom was an attorney - on the civil case which involved medical stuff, I even said that my Dad is a physician - no dice. I have no idea what the secret is to getting out of jury duty.

You must present as fatally open-minded.

See, this is cosmic punishment for not letting you adopt a kitten! ;)

Hey!!! That's an idea! I'm so telling him it's bad kitty karma. :snap:

Actually, if and when Orange County every figures out I live here (I've been registered to vote here for 5 years and have gotten diddly), I hope I do get selected. My company does pay for jury duty and it's something I would certainly want to be a part of at least once.

Of course if it's a Celebrity DUI, then he can write a book and make a million or two. :)

I just mentioned my brother in prison for child porn that got a raw deal by the DA. They excused me from the child abuse case they were trying to get jurors for. :D

I had a friend who felt the same way (as did I) until he ended up empaneled for the Oakland Riders case. A case that lasted 18 months from the beginning of voir dire to the end of jury deliberations (which took something like six weeks all on their own).

And then ended in a hung jury.

Another coworker ended up on a capital case and while the decision was as easy as such could ever be, it haunted him for a long time.

If I ever actually end up in voir dire (in all the times I've been summoned I've yet to actually even have to go in to the courhouse) I'll be honest and not actively try to avoid it (honestly, the people in the courtroom have seen everything and you're not likely to get away with it just because you're wearing odd clothes) but I no longer actively want to do it.

Oh heck - even the one-day cases can be scary. Nothing like sitting in the jury room while one of your fellow jurors announces that they have reasonable doubt because they believe that space aliens might have stopped time and invisibly planted the drugs.

Not that I would know from experience, or anything.

Ken just responded that he was a member of SADD while in highschool.

We need to work on his responses. ;)

Isn't Paris Hilton's case coming up?


Poor Ken.

Usually when they find out that my dad was a cop, they excuse me.
:shrug:

I'm sure your notorious gassiness had nothing to do with being released, eh?;)

I think you've discovered GC's rap name, "notorious gassiness"

Could you imagine repressing the call of the snow goose in a court room? It's so quiet in there, even a held back fart could be heard.
:D

I've been thanked and excused after explaining that I didn't believe objectivity was possible, that I could only render my subjective opinion (hey if objectivity were possible they wouldn't need 12 people to come to agreement about it). I have also disclaimed that I could follow the law, rules, and instructions so long as they were just laws, rules, and instructions. Stating I didn't believe in the death penalty also worked for one case.

Disneyphile, I'm very sorry to hear of the predicament, I can appreciate the situation because I know that even though I have a letter, I can still be ordered in.

GC, I read this:

and literally fell out of my chair laughing.

:D <------ My rascal smile.

GC has the very best fart euphemisms around, bar none.:cheers:

Susan was able to be excuse from a high profile case fairly easily. Played up her Pagan angle, made sure to show her tat prominently, and asked the lawyrs to repeat EVERY question they asked: lawyers hate that.

I thought lawyers liked to hear themselves talk.
:D ;)

I've been called almost every year of my adult life, have always wanted to serve, and have always had jobs that fully covered it. But I've never been picked. I don't get it! Does the eagerness show?

No, but they have seen your dancing chipmunk in your sig line.

:D ;)

I believe that is a Wookie, not a chipmunk.

No, you're thinking of "Gaseous Eruptions", who is someone completely different.

It's a wookiee dammit! A wookiee (with two es!)! You know: Chewbacca, Chewie, Walking Carpet. Sheesh.





You think maybe it's that?

Sorry for the misspelling - I am a Star Wars neophyte.

Sorry if my post looked like a spelling rant...it was meant to be a silly faux-rant on behalf of sad, Star Wars-minutiae-obsessed geeks. :D Like me. :blush:

Jury Duty - I'm supposed to report at the end of the month. I'm torn between wanting to actually be on a jury once and wanting to get paid. Can't do both.

We get paid for jury duty, and we get to keep the meagre jury duty allowance. (They gave up trying to collect the $10 from people.) I've only gotten to serve once, as the three other times I've been summoned was during a finals period of some sort and they elected not to reschedule me.

I was summoned once when I'd lived in Washington for 10 or 11 months. At the time, you had to be a resident of the county for a year to serve (the law changed and would have allowed me to serve 10 days earlier)

I was also summoned shortly before I moved from Oregon the last time, but would have been the day or two before I went on a scheduled vacation, so I asked to postpone it. By the time I got called back, I'd moved her to Louisiana.

I haven't been summoned yet here in Louisiana. I do get paid for it (I think they've given up on collecting the $ here, too - though I don't know how much they pay in my Parish), and would generally be willing to serve - but I would SOOO much rather be on a civil case than a criminal one. I had an aunt killed by her boyfriend years ago, and always figured I'd use that as my 'card' to get out of an icky criminal case. It's been over 16 years now, though (yikes, it doesn't seem that long) so I don't know how well that would fly - AND around here, I'm not really anxious to throw a wrench in any part of the criminal just system.

I was picked for a jury once, DUI case. I heard two days of testimony then went on a 3 day holiday weekend. By Tuesday I blindly drove myself to work and totally blanked on visiting the courtroom! :eek: After being at work a half hour it finally clicked and I called in to apologize. They told me to forget it. So I got out of passing judgement and didn't have to go back in. I wonder if that goes down on my permanent record.

It's probably the blondest moment this natural brunette has ever had. :blush:

Ironically, I forgot to mention in the selection that my uncle is an alcoholic who spent many years in prison for repeated DUIs. Duh.

All this fart talk makes me think of an interesting question... with my stomach issues, it can hit me at any time and leave me stuck in the restroom for extended periods (read: hours) of time. I wonder if telling them that would get me excused?

Of course, I'd have to actually show up first....:rolleyes:

You might get tossed just because no one wants to hear anyone talk about their bowel problems.

<PSA> Please, if you have IBS or other disgusting problems, keep them to yourselves. Coworkers, friends, and people standing behind you in line at various public places will think better of you for it.

I'm CP and I approved this ad. </PSA>

Sure. They're angry because your wookiee has buck teeth! :D

If I get called for Jury Duty, it does not benefit us as well. Luckily, I have family in Law Enforcement, and sometimes I get the same judge that knows my family.
So those are my "Get out of Jury Duty" cards. ;)

Last year I was able to use a financial hardship card (sole wage earner, no jury pay) via mail - I never had to go in. Simple and painless.

I actually would like to serve (I'm weird that way), it just has too much of an impact on a small company (especially since I am the "go-to guy" for, well, everything).

Hahaha.... I'm not about using the TMI card to get out of things!

I made sure to mention the word "coven" several times!!!

they thought I was the biggest freak they'd ever seen.



and I'm ok with that:D

But did you pronounce it "cuhven" or "Coh-ven"

I don't recall the answer to that question.

If you went in dress like, and talking like, Larry the Cable Guy and burst out with "Git 'er done!" once in a while I bet you'd never have to serve.

But then again, you could be just the type of idiot their looking for. You never know.....

Is it just me, or does the court system have a knack for picking the least opportune time to call you in for jury duty? I recently got my summons, and they want me to call March 16th to be told my schedule for the following week.

Of course, that Monday night I'm flying up to Monterey to spend Tuesday and Wednesday at a seminar which has been paid for for some time. Bastards. What the hell am I going to do?

request a rescheduled time?

Gonna have to, I guess. Pity of it is, I'm actually interested in it.

I go in March 5th. I wish San Diego had the phone in system. Here you have to show up. And they don't provide any parking, you're on your own.

Use the eff word a lot. They'll excuse you for that.
:D

We have the phone in system. There is parking, but on the opposite side of 4 traintracks than the courthouse. They make it clear that being late due to the train is not an excuse for being late. It wouldn't be too bad if the trains were simply passing through, but they are on their way to the train station/train yard and are either slowing and stopping or barely picking up speed.