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-   -   Trying to find a person - any ideas (http://74.208.121.111/LoT/showthread.php?t=7992)

katiesue 06-02-2008 12:17 PM

Trying to find a person - any ideas
 
Ok kind of long story-

Trying to help my Mom, help her friends, brother's friend (can't make this stuff up) find someone. The guy had a child in 1969 and has had no contact since she was a few months old. The guy now has a terminal illness and would like to get in contact with the daughter before it's too late. So I said I'd help.

I've just got her name and a birthdate. Luckily it's not a super common last name but I've had absolutely no luck finding anything at all. I've tried just straight yahoo and google searches. Classmates. Zaba. USA Search.

Any other ideas? It's quite possible that the mother got re-married and they changed the childs last name, or she's gotten married and had a name change.

Alex 06-02-2008 12:18 PM

Any idea where the child was born? (and on a side note, if he has had no contact since she was a couple months old, as much as it might make this guy feel better, I'd be subtly pushing that he not try to make contact or if he does to start with the mother; the daughter may not even be aware he exists)

JWBear 06-02-2008 12:25 PM

If she married, she would probably have a different last name now.

BarTopDancer 06-02-2008 12:26 PM

MySpace
Facebook
High school's (yearbooks)

But I also agree with Alex. She may have no idea this guy exists or his her father. And it probably won't be pretty when she gets to know him for a few months and then he dies.

innerSpaceman 06-02-2008 12:27 PM

Or, and this may or may not be evil, hire someone to play the daughter for one or two contacts before he passes on.

Moonliner 06-02-2008 12:29 PM

Oh! I'll do it. I'll play the daughter.

"Well dad, there have been a few changes in my life since we last saw each other....."

GusGus 06-02-2008 12:30 PM

my vote is for evil

very evil

not good

Moonliner 06-02-2008 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GusGus (Post 214595)
my vote is for evil

very evil

not good

I agree with Gusgus.

katiesue 06-02-2008 12:34 PM

I agree I don't think contact is the best idea. I have no idea of any of the circumstances. I just said I'd help look. I do have a city location for where she was born and the date.

Kevy Baby 06-02-2008 12:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by innerSpaceman (Post 214591)
Or, and this may or may not be evil, hire someone to play the daughter for one or two contacts before he passes on.

You are a bad, bad man!

Quote:

Originally Posted by GusGus (Post 214595)
my vote is for evil

very evil

not good

Who are you and what have you done with my wife?

Alex 06-02-2008 12:39 PM

If you want to share by PM I can do some searching (perfectly legal stuff) that may help. Do you know the mother's name as well?

Moonliner 06-02-2008 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by katiesue (Post 214597)
I agree I don't think contact is the best idea. I have no idea of any of the circumstances. I just said I'd help look. I do have a city location for where she was born and the date.

My guess would be that you'd be better off looking for the mother rather than the daughter. Can you search marriage records for the state and see if she comes up? Same for the daughter, marriage and or name change records should be public information.

You could also try the press. On a slow news day they might be able to help spread the word.

Hell you could even just post her name here. The Google spiders will pick it up in no time. I Google my own name every now and then just to see what's new. OK perhaps that's just me...

katiesue 06-02-2008 12:44 PM

I don't have the Mom's info just the daughters name, birthdate and place of birth. They know it's a longshot to find anything.

BarTopDancer 06-02-2008 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevy Baby (Post 214600)
You are a bad, bad man!

Who are you and what have you done with my wife?

I took her. I miss my drunken seamstress!

Kevy Baby 06-02-2008 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BarTopDancer (Post 214611)
I took her. I miss my drunken seamstress!

Cool... give me an address and I will forward the bills that go along with her,

BarTopDancer 06-02-2008 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevy Baby (Post 214612)
Cool... give me an address and I will forward the bills that go along with her,

OK, I'll send you all my bills.

Thanks!

katiesue 06-02-2008 01:02 PM

Geeze I just tried to find my birth certificate info. Guess they're not computerized yet. Last time I needed a copy of mine (about 6 years ago) I went to the courthouse and they literally have a book for each year. They take your "page" out which is the certificate, and copy it.

Chernabog 06-02-2008 01:30 PM

If it's that important then he might want to look into hiring a professional investigator -- at least then you'll know all avenues are covered.

Ponine 06-02-2008 01:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alex (Post 214604)
If you want to share by PM I can do some searching (perfectly legal stuff) that may help. Do you know the mother's name as well?

Ditto here, if Alex cant help, I might be able to.

GusGus 06-02-2008 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevy Baby (Post 214600)

Who are you and what have you done with my wife?

huh?

Deebs 06-02-2008 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by katiesue (Post 214584)
The guy had a child in 1969 and has had no contact since she was a few months old.

Was she relinquished for adoption as a baby? If so, does he know the name of the agency that handled it?

Quote:

The guy now has a terminal illness and would like to get in contact with the daughter before it's too late. So I said I'd help.
This is tricky. People are all so different, but as an adult adoptee, I would want to meet my birth father. I would probably be disappointed that he didn't take the initiative to search (given the fact that he knew the way her name appeared on her original birth cert) until he got terminally ill, but I would still rather meet him than not.

Strangler Lewis 06-02-2008 05:19 PM

I agree with Chernabog, except that I would start with a fee based internet service, e.g., Intelius. It will be much cheaper than a human PI.


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