DNA testing proves that I'm special!
 

http://news.yahoo.com/s/pagesix/2005...NlYwMlJVRPUCUl

Hey, it worked for Oprah, why not for me, too?

Oprah is a Zulu princess.

I want to be Rob Roy's [however many greats] grand something or other. Not because I have any Scottish ancestors that I know about. I just feel a kinship to Scottish people, particularly men, and particularly when I'm in close proximity to them and I can smell them and feel the air between us vibrate like a tuning fork - the tuning fork of love – whenever he speaks. And I love red hair. And beards. And fisherman, and lots of people in Scotland, certainly (‘cause I’ve never actually been) have red hair, and beards, and are fisherman, which means I probably had a lot of ancestors that fished. (Which is, all jokes aside, true, though they weren’t Scottish; they were Welsh and Irish).

But most likely I’d get my DNA tested and find out that I am the hairless descendent of a very hairy ape, and not a famous ape, like King Kong. Just a normal boring ape shaped creature destined to evolve into a somewhat adequate human being.

So, who are *you* descended from? And what mysteries might become usolved by your own celebrity DNA testing?

I wonder of a Wonder Bread White Girl can get info that is that specific?

Being an Eastern-European mish-mash Jew, I think it'd be hard to find out "exactly" what I am. I know for a fact that I've got German, Russian, Czech/Yugoslav, and Polish in me, plus a quarter South African (white via Britian, duh). Go back to Great Great Great Grandparents and I'm sure things just get more and more complex.

I find the vagueries annoying....let's keep it simple and say I'm a White American Jew with half South African ancestry. My kids can just be White American Jews. Perhaps all my progeny and their progeny will stay put so we can cut the complications and be White American Jews forever....at least, until Canada conquers us.

You follow the geneology path long enough and we're all hunter/gatherers living on what those people just called "The Land" in whatever language they spoke. :p

I wonder how many generations Oprah is removed from being Zulu? Her parents couldn't have been slaves, so were both of them of Zulu ancestry? The way she says it, it's as if she's nothing but pure Zulu.

I'm €uroMutt through and through, but I'd like to trace my ancestry back to something Byzantine - take me to those Greek and Turkish coastlines that I have yet to see with fabulously decorated churches/fortresses. Further back, I would come from Darius' Persia oppulant and poised for conquest.

Perhaps through another line would be Ghengis Khan, and his marauding hoards sweeping through Asia and Europe pillaging as they go. I could pick up a lot along the way, maybe even a link back to good ol' Siddhartha stirring in a bit of inner peace through all the termoil.

Whatever the truth, the fantasy is far more fun - save the DNA testing for the paternity suits.

You didn't need dna testing to learn that you're special, babe.

I could have told you that. For free.

But so far as my family goes. Its shrouded in mystery. The way I like it.

Hmm, fantasy ancestry.....Medieval Britian. It's one of the few historical periods that I actually dig, when you're talking royalty.....but then there's the whole "Christianity doing away with knowledge" thing, as well as feudal serfdom and such. It'd be nice to think I came from a princess who fell in love with a knight...but in all likelyhood I'd be descended from some peasant who happened to survive the Black Death by running away from her stricken family instead of caring for them.

Hmm, Renaissance then? Perhaps I'd be descended from a traveling minstrel that wrote love poetry for the wealthy....perhaps not a member of the intelligencia but close enough to hear the whispers of greatness....after the day is done, finding the local equivalent of a beat club and swapping concepts with other deep thinkers.

Chinese warlords.


Ok, fine. In fact, I'm descended from a long line of trailer folk.

I've got the papes that say that, along my father's bloodline, I'm decended from Governor Bradford (who arrived upon the Mayflower.) I don't have the cash to test my DNA, though.

On the other side of my gene pool, I'm sure that the DNA testing would come across as such:
11% baker from Bavaria
14% German milkmaid
9% weaver from Slovakia
15% peasant Czech farmer
1% pirate, origin unknown

Well, I grew up being told by my parents that this is so, anyway.

Supposedly my mom's family members are direct descendents of Jesse James. Explains a lot about my grandmother. :evil:

My parents are "mutts" German, Irish, Scottish, French, English...heaven only knows what else.

My birth mother's last name is pure Irish....but I really don't look Irish at all.......

Personally, I think it would be cool to be a descendent of Jesus, like in the movie Dogma, or in The DaVinci Code. ;)

Well, my DNA would fail to disclose the Scottish component, because, well, I'm not Scottish. But my family lived there, and a whole generation grew up there, so we night as well be. You should see my family's obsession with tea.