Drunk Driving Kills...
 

...Chickens

Drunken German joyrider kills 300 chickens
Teen crashes into shed, sending poultry into a panic

The rest of the story.

I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight...

If only a stuffed chicken had been amongst them...;)

I know some birds are real sketchy. A friend of mine re-arranged their living room, and hung new pictures on the walls. The commotion killed their parakeet.

Or maybe they had a gas leek we didn't know about.

As sad as it is for those poor chickens, and the loss to those folks of 300 chickens, the picture I have in my head makes me laugh.

All is peaceful, and the birds are sleeping soundly. It's a quiet night just like any other night. Then suddenly all hell breaks through the wall, heavy metal blasting on the stereo. The chickens lurch off their perch, wings flapping furiously in the air sending feathers flying every-which way! Chickens screech at the top of their lungs and panic ensues, as birds try to pass through plywood walls, unsuccessfully. Some figure they have died already and gone to hell anyway, so they give up and drop dead. A drunken teenager stumbles out of the crunched van, "I'll take a bucket of extra-crispy and a large coke please!" As he passes out and falls to the ground, he lands on the last two surviving poultry, killing them instantly. Once again, all is quiet.

Sorry, it painted such a colorful mental picture that I had to share. I don’t mean to make light of the tragedy, just embellish it a bit.