You Know You're REALLY a Redneck When...
 

1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, guys, watch this."

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines."

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

Sadly, #6 applies to a member of my family.

#2 is us....... We usually joke that everytime we fill up with Gas, we double the value of the truck.

...Almost true nowadays since it now costs between $80 - $90 for a full tank of gas... :eek:

Hmm, turns out I know a lot of rednecks.

Gay is the new black AND the new redneck?

I got one....

You know you are a redneck when you will not eat in the French restaurant in Epcot because France did not support us in the war on Iraq.

When my uncle did that, that's when I realized he was a redneck.

Does he call the fried potatoes that he gets with his Big Mac and Coke at McDonalds?