When you fall on your face you're still moving forward.  

  Hey! No one's quoted me!!!  

  If you guys move in over The Lubery, I'm going to laugh my ass off.  

  Sooo...

What are you doing right now?  

  I don't know, perhaps I'm old fashioned, but if I'm going to masturbate, I'm not going to hop in the car and head to the grocery store to thump some melons. Guess I just prefer porn over produce.  

  As a Jewish man, I favor the spandex undergarment because it allows me to wear tallit to the pool.  

  Ugh. I gave my dinner oral.  

  Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.  

  I wonder when Nietzsche will start appearing in my add - offering to add inches with his Will to Power technique?  

  I'll be spending my final days on the isle of Waponi Wu where I will party for several days and then throw myself into a volcano. Orange soda will be involved...  

  I love Dave Matthews, chewy brownies, Roller Coaster Tycoon 2 and Judi Dench.

...And penis. Gargantuan American penis.  

  I don't know how any of you can post about this when BORNIEO IS GONNA DIE!  

  I'm home. Why is my bra still on?  

  ... And every leap of faith needs to start from a springboard of clear thinking ...  

  I'm spending time discovering me, and you just can't find that in a lipgloss wand.  

  I just wanted to see her tits too.  

  He brought prostitution to it's knees, one hooker at a time.  

  No more chicken, no more cow,
Feed me friggin' bacon now!  

  We've had a little conversation here, in the virtual world, that may come up in actual face-to-face conversation the next time we're at a LoT meet. In one thread we're talking about our high school experiences, in another, our political feelings, and in a third, what songs make us happy. And, of course, bacon.  

  It's not so much that we like our sh!t stirred on the LoT, we just like the *ka-BOOM* you get when you throw a cherry bomb into an outhouse.

The stank is bonus.  

  I am fairly certain that it is against the Geneva convention to confine someone to a hospital bed and not provide internet access.  

  ...a disquieting metamorphosis as my body becomes a baby machine.  

  If a guy plays QB at Notre Dame and can walk and chew gum at the same time, Superstar!  

  Success and failure are not defined by how many mistakes you made or didn't make, how many good or bad decisions you might have made, or how often you've been right or wrong. They are defined by how you handle the mistakes, the bad decisions, and being wrong. Success isn't perfection, success is treating every step as a new opportunity to get it right, no matter how many steps you've gotten wrong up to that point.  

  Nipples can wait. (It's the sequel to Heaven Can Wait.)