It's not often we get to take a drunk virgin for a ride.  

  Hey! No one's quoted me!!!  

  If you guys move in over The Lubery, I'm going to laugh my ass off.  

  Sooo...

What are you doing right now?  

  As a Jewish man, I favor the spandex undergarment because it allows me to wear tallit to the pool.  

  Ugh. I gave my dinner oral.  

  Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.  

  Actually - it's the Russian Robots that offend us, if a human Russian wished to join us, we'd break out the Stoli  

  I'll be spending my final days on the isle of Waponi Wu where I will party for several days and then throw myself into a volcano. Orange soda will be involved...  

  I don't know how any of you can post about this when BORNIEO IS GONNA DIE!  

  I'm home. Why is my bra still on?  

  ... And every leap of faith needs to start from a springboard of clear thinking ...  

  I am similarly agnostic about whether there are invisible phase-shifted evil robots in my bedroom closet just waiting for me to go to sleep tonight so that they could kill me.  

  He brought prostitution to it's knees, one hooker at a time.  

  No more chicken, no more cow,
Feed me friggin' bacon now!  

  It's not so much that we like our sh!t stirred on the LoT, we just like the *ka-BOOM* you get when you throw a cherry bomb into an outhouse.

The stank is bonus.  

  Remember to laugh. I hope that at the end of my life, that's the wisdom I have to offer.  

  You know, I think we need to propose a law that forbids anyone other than Catholics from using the word "prayer". After all, the word entered the English language from French at the beginning of the 14th century, and at that time Catholicism would have been the predominant religion, so clearly the word was never intended to apply to anything other than Catholic prayer.  

  At first I thought the guy was all business, but when he turned around, I realized he came to PARTY!  

  I like my asparagus like I like my men: Tender but firm, and wrapped in bacon.  

  At home, he waves his stick only there's no cardboard sign at the top.  

  The correct grammar would be "CANT HAZ!  

  From my great aunt: Only boring people get bored.  

  [quote=Ghoulish Delight;344886]No, I'm talking insects. The 6 mile long swarm I biked through on the way to work this morning.[/quote]

Protein. Ride with your mouth open.

(It's Nature's little Power Bar.)  

  Even the completely unconscious chick being dragged around by paramedics had a huge smile on her face.