99.9% of people on the planet are born with a part or two that distinguish them as male or female. you would think after a few million years of evolution, they would have adjusted to seeing them (or at least the imagery) on occasion.

who's runnin this f'd up planet anyway?  

  Who's runnin this f'd up planet anyway?  

  to hold you in my arms
until such time as dust overtake us
and return us to from whence we came
in the bosom of the mother earth herself
through eternity you shall mine be


...until some feckless wanker comes and digs us up

:/  

  another story from that page, equally crack up inducing (to me at least.) Headline "Topless wife photo ends man's pole protest  

  Theres a reason its called 'cold turkey'.....cuz the turkey is DEAD!  

  mock god? dunno bout you, but the power I perceive has one 773H of a good sense of humor. remember, this is the same being that made saturn wear a tutu  

  so THATS why the rum's always gone  

  I think about shaving mine a lot. since it started slowly turning white I start to wonder whats under there.  

  That was totally neat!!!! I do like the balls better though.  

  Whoever expects theme parks to be empty on a frigging holiday weekend needs to remove their heads from their dark dark anus.  

  .....and now we have vampiric arachnids in our midst....great.



personally, I think Im gonna go back to bed and let this weirdness tsunami subside  

  room? only room anywhere nearby was the outhouse...and that was DEFINITELY self serve
 

  I liked it better when the local kids thought of me as that crazy old guy who lives in the haunted house  

  Holy lord, it took 232 posts for this thread to get to the subject of tits and/or bacon?!?!?  

  ... that boy has some balls. I mean, I could strip in front of strangers, but in front of Glenn Close? Yeeech.  

  soo...if you ever want to try something to really make your mouth tingle and give yourself a really low opinion of yourself, try what I just did...

make a nice cup of tea
light a scented xmas candle
start net surfing in earnest
then, while paying no attention to what youre doing, sip a bit of the melted wax from the lit candle you set too close to your cup of tea
afterward, spend an hour or so trying to get that taste out of your mouth and peeling the wax from your skin and combing it out of your beard (if any).

good times....


PS: also, be sure and write down the new curse words you discover in the process  

  I think my colon just fainted  

  ....and for my next trick, watch me pull a rabbit out of my ass!



huh?.....hat? are you sure?




oh..ok. uh....please excuse me for a moment.  

  ....and for my next trick, watch me pull a rabbit out of my ass!

(offstage whispers)

huh?.....hat? are you sure?

(offstage whispers)


oh..ok. uh....please excuse me for a moment.  

  I must agree. I see zero sense in making such a thing so readily available to the first feckless wanker with $200 burning a hole in his pocket.


(mine should arrive in 10-14 business days )  

  If your childhood Buzz went all Talky-Tina on you, you'd whip out a blowtorch and go all wrath-of-God on his ass real quick.  

  Tim Burton's "The King's Speech" would have Johnny Depp as King George, dream-like flashbacks to his growing up with "King Daddy George" and a CGI trip through his larynx set to the music of Oingo Boingo.  

  Tim Burton's "The King's Speech" would have Johnny Depp as King George, dream-like flashbacks to his growing up with "King Daddy George" and a CGI trip through his larynx set to the music of Oingo Boingo.  

  Oh yeah? Well in my day they nailed you into the seat, poured scalding coffee in your lap, and dropped you on your head from 200 feet without an ambulance. And we were grateful! LOL...  

  that which is seen cannot be unseen

dammit