How dare you interupt a thread on porn to talk about sex!  

  Bornieo reached out, and grabbed that shaft with both hands, and took it like a man!  

  You may stop mourning for the dead at Disneyland when the longjohns turn pink.  

  We would bring the red longjohns but that's for dead people, not dead attractions.  

  I'm now the proud owner of The Clapper.  

  I would ask about the bruising but I don't think I should get the whole LoT lot thinking about your boob...  

  It's so quiet in there, even a held back fart could be heard.  

  Isn't your ass a rectangle? Mine sure is.  

  omg! I got quoted! I got quoted!!

my life is complete now.  

  Only on LoT can a discussion about periods and boobs turn into feminism and matriarchal rituals. I fvcking love this place.  

  [QUOTE=Not Afraid;163231]I throw like a girl or retard [/QUOTE]

You throw like a girl with a bluetooth bondo'd to the side of her head.  

  Well, I guess scaeagles and I will be doing the catering. Is everyone ok with ham sandwiches?

They're sphincterrific!  

  Dude, if you've been fvcking donuts, we need to get you a woman, pronto...  

  [QUOTE=Motorboat Cruiser;227990]Wow, that was one of the stronger earthquakes I've felt in a long while.
[/QUOTE]

That's what you said last time we were together.  

  Unfortunately, whether he is pitching or catching, there is little that his "companions" are able to actually feel. The ol' ham ain't what it used to be and the flipside....well, it was never very impressive to begin with. Sadly, it gets harder and harder for him to justify the price of a toaster. From what I understand, he will now accept a Bic Lighter as payment.  

  It's my thing, small as it might be...  

  Is it supposed to go inside or outside my jockstrap?  

  I like decapitation. If you decapitate someone, you really meant it. That's impressive.  

  My thoughts of you did not involve lying on my back with an erection, I promise.  

  In order to fully appreciate our vintage, you need to pop our cork.  

  [QUOTE=LSPoorEeyorick;242951]Which, by the way, does not mean you're a jelly doughnut.[/QUOTE]I know. I HATE when people say that! Everybody knows that what JFK actually said translated to "I am a cross-dresser  

  Oh, I'm sorry. Let me rephrase in the message board time honored way of avoiding personal attacks:

Some group of people of which you are a member, but I'm not saying this about you personally just a group of people that so happens to include you, must be from Arizona.  

  [quote=Kevy Baby;258802]There was a twisted part of me [/quote]They really need a "don't try this at home" warning on that Puppetry of the Penis DVD.  

  That's it, I'm pulling the plug on this conversation. We're just cycling through infertile material now. And it's really cramping this thread. If some infrequent, monthly visitor to the board were to see this, they'd think we're all pretty unsanitary. I'm spotting some folks who just want to pad their post count.  

  If your childhood Buzz went all Talky-Tina on you, you'd whip out a blowtorch and go all wrath-of-God on his ass real quick.