I did get knocked semi-conscious today by a windblown umbrella  

  The only way you could make scaeagles tight again is to stick in a ham and pull out the bone.  

  Well, what if my kid gets trampled?!  

  That's The Derby  

  GD: Carp, it's 3 already?

NA: Goldfish, yes it is.  

  I want to come back as a funnel cake. A spooky funnel cake.  

  That's it. I'm moving to Scotland to become a Highland Cow farmer.  

  What if the cow is just born ugly? Is the Clint Howard of veal fair game?  

  Unless it was essentially an MTV Award for Shrillest Performance by a Shrilly Person.  

  That was totally neat!!!! I do like the balls better though.  

  If goodness is determined by the lack of crap in the living room and no piles of shoes, my family and I will be burning in the pit of hell for all eternity.  

  You made out on your first date? GD is a slut!  

  I'm gonna wear my Halloween costume.
Every fag protest needs a cowboy.  

  TRON 2 is coming out soon. That's much more interesting than what Erica could possibly be posting  

  it isn't too often I get to show it off in public.  

  If sunscreen tasted delicious this is what it would taste like.  

  Suck it, macadamia man! There can be only one champion worthy of the "Baking Is Gay!" trophy towel. I am that champion.  

  You can absolutely skip Stitch the Great Escape. They basically strap you in and blow chili farts in your face. It's gross.  

  While out of context is usually funny I wish there was a track back link to the original thread.  

  And I do agree with GD on the Constitutional question.  

  ...it also felt like something that might get old quick. But I'll ride it until it does.  

  A country that dwells too much on the suck in life finds itself killing people for really stupid reasons a couple centuries down the road.  

  That which is embarrassing among friends is not a 1 to 1 overlap with that which is embarrassing when you're mom wants to talk about it.  

  Errr, don't you just move the lever and bump into things? Is there more to it than that?  

  Good observation by lashbear, regarding the tongue.