Thanks to the miracles of science, I have the sphincter of a 20 year old.  

  Congrats on your first time with the shaft!  

  I'm so un-hip, it's a wonder my bum doesn't fall off.  

  I'd rather listen to a family of pigs being chucking into the Grand Canyon....  

  I will remember about innerSpaceman's package and sceagles sphincter, by dint of sheer repetition.  

  The constitution specifically allows individual states to determine on their own how to assign electors. If they wanted, they could theoretically give that power solely to the governor. They could engage in a roshambo contest among the major candidates. They could put every candidates picture on a mat and give the electors to the candidate first shat upon by a chicken.  

  I predict sausage in your future  

  The box has been cleaned and is ready for use.  

  Muuuhhhaaauuu.... The secret purpose of EruoDisney is at last reveled. All your culture are belong to US!  

  I swear life is never dull around here  

  [QUOTE=Moonliner]So what you are saying is that girth is an issue in selecting a proper fit?[/QUOTE]

I think it goes without saying that girth should be considered in all issues such as these.  

  [quote=lashbear]Guess what I'm bringing to Yosemite ?????[/quote]


Vegemite?  

  Proper punctuation and capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse..  

  This suggests I have the power of taxation.  

  Are you insinuating that there is a possibility that some of my posts have been in some way suggestive?!?


 

  (in reference to his grasp of Spanish)

It's weird that I know how to say "vaginally", but not "arm".  

  Hugs to the supersize dildo lubed with Not Afraid's snot.  

  I missed hernias, cognac, and aliens? Damn it!  

  Dude, there was NO BACON in that dream. How could it possibly be labeled "best dream evar" without some freaking bacon in it?  

  soo...if you ever want to try something to really make your mouth tingle and give yourself a really low opinion of yourself, try what I just did...

make a nice cup of tea
light a scented xmas candle
start net surfing in earnest
then, while paying no attention to what youre doing, sip a bit of the melted wax from the lit candle you set too close to your cup of tea
afterward, spend an hour or so trying to get that taste out of your mouth and peeling the wax from your skin and combing it out of your beard (if any).

good times....


PS: also, be sure and write down the new curse words you discover in the process  

  Yes, but I don't want to meet random people, I want to meet LoTters. You know, people I can trust to construct complete sentences that don't consist entirely of "me too!!!!  

  However, I don't think (and maybe I'm insane)  

  am I seriously joining a discussion of the real-world-logistics of creating a boatplanecar?  

  Predicting a 4-5 magnitude earthquake is not quite like saying it will be sunny here in LA, but close.  

  Any continuation of the line of thought is going to end up using "love tunnel," and awkward first person exposition, I just know it.