I'm so un-hip, it's a wonder my bum doesn't fall off.  

  I predict a bacon glut in 2008 - followed by a bacon gut  

  I'd rather listen to a family of pigs being chucking into the Grand Canyon....  

  I could talk about it now if you want. It just doesn't seem as thrilling.  

  If I told you I'd have to kill you. Really.  

  What could this group possibly use more than a good Zookeeper!  

  Except for being fat, ugly, and a prick I'm the ideal human being.  

  Are there any gay people who post on this board?  

  Cute guys read?  

  I am also amused by people that are perfectly okay with being seen in a bikini, but are mortified is seen in their underwear. Specifically when the underwear covers MORE than the bikini!  

  I'm hot for all the wrong reasons.  

  Ooops- the cat's eaten it.  

  I'm gonna hide in the refrigerator.  

  I don't know, would you settle for a Tub-Sized Queen instead ?  

  Dear GD,

You haven't packed CP, as she is still snoozing - God I hope you left room for her...although I'll miss you both while you are away.

Hugs,

The Stoat.  

  I disagree. At the risk of entering into an teleologically ontological discussion of the merits and disingenuations of said conundrum, I would have to suggest that even if the form of impact were less than injurious the intent and willingness (or perhaps negligence and inattention) that lead to such impact would carry through the day on still totally sucking.

One might respond vis-a-vis the argument from nerfness in which one is not only struck by an arrow in such a way as no harm is caused but also with an arrow of such material that no harm is possible. In a situation of such extremity it would continue to totally suck in that one is such an oaf as to be unable to avoid impact with said trifle.

There also exists, in a post-Freudian deconstructionist interpretation of the problem statement, the theory that the arrow in question is not, per se, actually an arrow but instead a penis. In which case it could be argued that while "totally suck" might not actually happen, it is without doubt true that some person involved in the impact scenario will wish it did.  

  I'm frequently a cranky old fart.  

  It's not their fault he's in the database, and in a weird way it's his shot at semi-immortality. Didn't have to write the Great American Novel- he just had to subscribe to Reader's Digest 20 years ago and voila! people are still talking about him.  

  My sister is a control freak moron - just sayin...  

  There is not enough bleach in the world to wash that image away....  

  I thought this was actually going to be about grills inside houses. It happens every year when there is a power outage -- some idiots try to cook on their grill inside their house or attached garage and get carbon monoxide poisoning. I suppose it's a modern form of natural selection.  

  I'd like to see them stick a little closer to the ride and maybe include a scene with the pirates sailing past a restaurant.  

  Hometown Buffet and roadkill should never be in the same post  

  Congratulations!

Proof that the acorn can fall far from the tree.