You haven't lived until you've nursed a transformer.  

  Coincidentally, I named my cat, Track 2, after a Joanna Newsom song. I couldn't remember the title, so I was forced to do what I could under the circumstances.  

  I would have myself, but that is not my style.  

  Only on LoT can a discussion about periods and boobs turn into feminism and matriarchal rituals. I fvcking love this place.  

  Yes, it does seem that a robotic sphincter would solve all your problems.  

  Sheep are actually several million years old. In fact, science tells us female dinosaurs used them as tampons.  

  Granted I am quite keen on the pop-up variety of book. But where are the Festivals of Pop up Books?

Exactly. Nowhere to be seen.  

  Its surprising because mobs are usually so rational.  

  The Lord God Father Almighty was reportedly "miffed"...  

  Then the dog ate the costume.  

  I personally hope for a society where everyone is chipped, the government sees everything, and artificial intelligence threatens our species. Then maybe we'll get some new plots for sci-fi movies.  

  I personally hope for a society where everyone is chipped, the government sees everything, and artificial intelligence threatens our species. Then maybe we'll get some new plots for sci-fi movies.  

  So, he's a broke cheating asshole, then?

Good.  

  Or, in other words ...

To Err is human,
To Moo,
Bovine.  

  Bah! Nobody really worries about this kind of crap. This is a fine example of manufactured controversy; pre-packaged and sold to the most shameless news outlet.  

  Great news. There is nothing sadder to me in this world then a sick boob. May your wife's breasts continue to grow and prosper in good health. I believe its time to take them out and celebrate, preferably at the next meet! Huzzah!  

  I am so tired of lists. So, let me introduce ...

My Least Favorite Lists List

10. Anything by by David Wallechinsky and Amy Wallace
09. or, Rolling Stone
08. or, Mojo
07. or, Empire
06. or, Entertainment Weekly
05. or, the AV Club
04. or, Local video store clerk
03. or, List found in Eichmann's pocket
02. or, Richard Nixon enemy list
and
01. AFI  

  It's not their fault he's in the database, and in a weird way it's his shot at semi-immortality. Didn't have to write the Great American Novel- he just had to subscribe to Reader's Digest 20 years ago and voila! people are still talking about him.  

  Here's something for the Quotes: I agree with Scaeagles.  

  Remember to laugh. I hope that at the end of my life, that's the wisdom I have to offer.  

  I'd like to see them stick a little closer to the ride and maybe include a scene with the pirates sailing past a restaurant.  

  [To get out of fighting the Cola Wars I switched to Canadian Club.  

  So what is on the Gay Agenda for to-day? I hope grocery shopping, because we need milk.  

  Shampoo, rinse, shampoo, rinse, separate lather from soap, rub on body, rinse, remove clothes, shampoo hat, rinse.  

  I only wish more of my tax money went social programs. I would rather feed the poor than the war machine.