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I think appropriateness is important in the workplace and whatever your sexual orientation you should stick to the rules. But, what were the rules? Were there any spelled out for everyone?
Also, keep in mind that the comments you heard were not his. He was not saying that he got away with it because he was gay, other people were saying that.
I'm also thinking that the costume was pretty clever and if you were there 10 years ago, it might have been funnier.
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