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Originally Posted by innerSpaceman
Also, we are making the assumption that he was given a pass because he's gay when, as I understand it, it was simply office scuttlebutt that he is (a) gay, and (b) getting away with it because of that.
Was it his (your) superiors who made that overheard, off-hand comment ... or merely co-workers?
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(a) He's gay. That part wasn't rumor. I was unaware of the fact beforehand simply because I don't really know the guy. But the people who told me do know him and it's not a "Psst, I heard he's gay." He's openly gay.
(b) Do I know for sure? No. Was it superiors that I overheard? No. But, judging from what was said directly to me plus the various things I overheard through the day, I got a very clear impression that people who otherwise would have made a complaint (nothing ever happens unless someone complains) hestiated due to him being gay.
That begs the question of why I didn't complain. Fact is, I wouldn't complain either way, I'm just not the file-a-complaint type. Generally, it doesn't offend me particularly much, and my general feeling is that if it's something that's way over the line, someone else will do the complaining for me. Plus, compared to a lot of people, I'm very much the new comer whereas this guy's been with the company almost since it started. I know that shouldn't make a difference, but in reality it does. And the people I overheard throughout the day saying, "Gosh, that could be offensive, but..." were the people who usually do the complaining around here.
So I was surprised when no one made a big deal out of it. I mean hell, our manager had to give us a dress code reminder the day after someone ratted on one of my male coworkers for wearing
shorts.