[Cadaverous Pallor]

So. Here's how my working Saturday started.

Early on, I'm helping a man with his account when one of his twin sons starts to cry for no reason. He instinctively picks up the 5 year old boy, and next thing you know, the kid is vomiting all over him. I saw it in all it's awful detail, undigested chunks of early lunch and all. I saw all this and ran away, presumably to get some paper towels, but more just because GOD DAMN that is nasty.

The man went outside with a roll of paper towels while we cleaned the carpet with Formula 409. He came back in to return the roll, then left...but was back in a few minutes later. He explained that he had clothes in the car and changed.

Well, yeah, dude, but YOU STILL SMELL LIKE VOMIT. GET OUT. I thought this very hard as I checked out his items as fast as humanly possible. I almost gagged.

Lessons learned?

1) Do not pick up a child just because he starts crying.

2) Take a goddamned shower before purposely encountering another human being after you've been drenched in the contents of someone's stomach.

and

3) Working Saturday sucks, but it could always be worse.