I was paid for grades. But, as mentioned before, it wasn't "get good grades for a reward", it was more like a salary. "You want money? Earn it." Same went for allowance. I didn't just get an allowance, I got an allowance if I mowed the lawn and took out the trash.
And praising kids is about more than just encouraging good behavior through praise. It's about instilling a sense of empathy, letting them know that other people actually care about their success. Like Moonliner, I'm not advocating a, "You lost, what a loser!" attitude. It's about effort. I'm just against the "You're a winner no matter what!" mantra.
Challenging them, asking the questions that make them think about what they've learned is also important, but the two aren't mutually exclusive. There was plenty of both in my house.
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'He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me.'
-TJ
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