[€uroMeinke]

Well you can deal with this as a philosophic question, but honestly this has nothing to do with philosophy and the meaning of life - though I can go that road if you prefer.

We lost a child at the five month mark. It was horrific in so many ways. Too far along for simple procedures, labor was induced. And our child, also too far along to be called a miscarrige required funeary preperations. Neither oneof us had any sense of what to do, or what was right, eventhough the social workers and doctors were there to tell us about medicine and the law.

We didn't even know if we should name him - though we did later, in private: Robert, after his grandfather who likewise passed to soon.

We returned to work, to go back to our lives. For me, my staff who jokingly called me "pappy," were now silent and somber. A few women shared with me in private their similar experiences, but mostly everyone pretended nothing happened, including oursleves.

We never properly grieved and rather let the unaddressed sadness pull our relationship appart. Eighty percent of marriages that experience the death of a child end in divorce. We were no different.

So my advice, though you didn't ask for it, is to grieve this loss - for every loss is the absence of potential. Grieve for your sister and her family, show them your love and let them share their pain.

I'm so sorry for your loss - there will be plenty of time for philosophy some other time.