[Cadaverous Pallor]

I'm a pyro, but I'm no fan of trick candles. The sparking gives it away, but then you're still supposed to try blow them out like a tool, and everyone gets to laugh at you for sucking at something that's impossible. Longer time blowing also means more wax in my frosting - and that's just crappy.

I'd like my next bday cake to have that Indiana Jones fireball effect. Whoosh!