[Prudence]

I swear I don't dwell on this all the time - but now they're asking for us to provide the name of our post-graduation employer so they can include it in the graduation programs. Because most people have post-graduation employers line up already - but not me.

So once again I brooding. What the hell is wrong with me? At this point, I honestly think that the spectre of that damn erroneous C is going to ruin the rest of my professional life. Everyone who looks at my resume says "wow!" Everyone who looks at my cover letter says "wow!" And they're honest-to-goodness "wows" from people who wouldn't hesitate to tell me exactly how I fvcked up.

And yet - the interest isn't there. Most of my classmates (with far less stellar creds) have jobs lined up. Good jobs, too. Jobs I'd love to have. And yet - here I sit.

I've had a few interviews, but mostly it's been nothing. And for all that nothing - they haven't even seen me yet, so they can't be put off by my appearance. And I can't get too upset about the interviews I've had. The DOT gets what - 2000+ applications for its 7 positions? I can't really push that off on appearance and say that's what sunk me.

I really don't get it. I don't need people fighting amongst themselves to recruit me, but to have next-to-no interest?

And the longer it takes, the harder it gets, because if my resume is "wow!" and I'm not yet employed, it sends a message to potential employers that there's obviously something wrong with me.

and what's wrong with me is that there was a C on my transcript that was there in error, and that's why I didn't get a summer internship, which is why I don't have a job now.

But I can't put that on my resume. and without that explanation, I look like damaged goods.

If I thought for a second it would work I'd open my own firm and hire the unemployed LoTers. But, I don't have a bunch of money - or any relevant experience - so that's not going to happen.

I want to break things. Large and expensive things. It's sucks that I went through all this just so I could remain a secretary.