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Garrison Keillor quotes (I'm cheating with more than one today):
"They would not be smart enough to pour piss out of their boots, if the instructions were written on the sole."
"The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles."
"I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it."
"God writes a lot of comedy...the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors that don't know how to play funny."
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My advice to the women of America is to raise more hell and fewer dahlias. ~~ William Allen White
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