Rack up a +1 for living on the Bitter East Coast.
Generally we don't get
EATEN ALIVE like you SoCal'ers apparently do.
So now in addition to the standard rule of beach safety:
"If tide suddenly goes out, don't go pickup the fish. Run away. "
We can add a new one:
"If Seals or Sea Lions suddenly beach themselves, it's probably best that you do too."