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From the tasteless mind of MBC...
We now present to you an exclusive CNN interview with the new Pope.
Your Holiness, We are unfamiliar with your background. Exactly where were you a Cardinal?
At a Wall-Mart in Germany.
The previous Pope was considered a "Pope of the People". Will you carry on the tradition and work for the good of the common man?
Please. I refuse to sink to your level in order to answer that.
We have heard reports that you were considering the name "Pope Larry". Why didn't you go with that name?
I thought about it, but then I thought better.
We understand that you are going to allow one form of birth control. Can you tell us what it will be?
Applesauce.
Hmm, that's an odd choice. Is this a form of birth control that is reliable?
I'd say that would be unwise.
Have you ever used applesauce as a contraceptive?
I did that once. The monkey didn't like it.
Why were you with a monkey in the first place?
I couldn't live without it.
We were under the impression that you took an oath of celebacy. And yet you had relations with a monkey?
What else could I have done? If you were in that situation, you'd do it too.
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