[MerryPrankster]

Good morning, ______! (Whatever name I'm currently calling my husband. Lately it's been Jodie the Pig from The Amityville Horror because he burned his eyeballs a fiery red. These are names of affection. We have a warped sense of humor.)

Do you have any conference calls today?

What time are you going to go running?

What's your schedule tomorrow?

Yeah, we have to start eating a lot healthier.

Another unknown caller/blocked call...I'm not answering it.

Look at this spider!

Get that snowboard out of the house!

Hello...yeah, okay. But I really need to get some projects done around the house today.

It's cold in here.

Is it spring yet?

Wilbur must be hungry. (the real pig next door)

Hello pretty girl....you're the smartest pup in the whole wide world! (to the neighbor's dog)

What's that smell? (I have a waaay too sensitve sense of smell)

Holy moly, Holy cow or Holy crap!

What should we have for dinner?

Please.....thank you.

Is this clean or dirty? (picking up a piece of clothing)

Turn that down...you must be deaf.

I love you.

Good night, ______.