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Happy Birthday to the best roommate ever! I don't know what I can possibly get you or do for you to make your day more special, what with you already having a million video games and a super cool boyfriend. If I haven't told you yet today, I'm grateful that you share my home (and my bills). Where can I take you for brunch?
"Parmesan Joe," that's funny!
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Does anyone still wear a hat? 
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