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		 'It was 1972, while in service to this great nation of ours, that I first considered the possibility of reaching for the office of the Presidency.  I was engaged in a recon mission in the backwoods of Alabama, and got lost.  (The dude said the kegger was two klicks left of the old Smythe plantation- asshole was probably high).  Wandering around the swampy, snake infested woods I began to panic, and in my despair I swore that I would give anything for just a drink, preferably Jack Daniels, with maybe little line of the white stuff to keep me sharp.  Suddenly, the forest opened up, and I found myself standing at a crossroad.  There in the center was Daddy's bud, Dick, holding a shotgun in one hand and some sort of document in the other....... 
 
Well, I guess y'all know the rest.' 
		
	
		
		
		
		
			
		
		
		
		
	
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