Sorry I didn't get to this earlier!
Very, very nice.
The multiple cuts to "future" Max can be a bit confusing, but when viewed as a screenplay, it works rather well. Max's point of view is well stated, characters are well defined. Solid.
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He’s standing by his father, who's face we can’t see, and is always looking down, hands in his pockets- shifting around alot.
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Minor nitpick - it's a bit confusing as to who is "always looking down" etc., Max or his father.
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So this is a story that was to appear in an "anthology" title.
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An anthology of your own? Do you have more to share? We'd love to see it!