I am coming late to this discussion (and I rewrote this several times and I'm still not sure I have it right), however...
It strikes me that your difficulty is not in what you believe, or for that matter what the Catholic Church believes. Rather it is a question of what you do with all of that. For me (I'm an atheistic leaning agnostic, raised Methodist), there is no discrepancy in loving the ceremony of the church while shunning many (most?) of their teachings.
For all that I have turned my back on organized religion, I still find comfort in going to Christmas eve services. The yearly ritual, in which little changes, takes me back to a time when worries were few, when Santa was bringing presents the next day and when all was right with my world. Going to the services now obviously does not mean I want to go back (or for that matter that I have any interest in embracing religion), only that for a short time I can remember the magic of childhood.
I have also found myself on occasion entering a Catholic Church and lighting a candle for someone. It is not the conotation that the church gives it that I seek, it is the feeling within myself that there are times I can do nothing but exist on faith (whatever that faith may be). I also have to say that I find sitting in a church one of the most comforting places to be when I have been in a bad place in my life. Not because of the religion, but because I know that it is a place where so many have come looking for answers to their pain. I think you mentioned being an "old soul", I kind of view churches in the same light.
Many people turn to religion when they seek answers to the unknown. There is obviously a comfort in knowing that there is a reason for things, even if that reason can never be known. I strikes me that what you are looking for is not religion (or Catholicism itself) but a comfortable answer for many things in your life. And it may be that there are no comfortable answers. And it may also be that many of your memories from when you were safe, cocooned and loved are tied to the Catholic church, and church ritual; to feel that again would make things right in your world.
I don't know if I am making sense to you, or even if I am close to the mark. But from my perspective, take what you need from the church and it's services. Make it what
you need it to be, not what anyone is telling you it should be. If there is a God, it seems to me that in your worship, he would want you to be true to yourself, not to some supposed "ideal" that a whole bunch of men decided upon long ago. It has been said many times that we are all sinners. None of us meet the "ideal" (okay, I come damn close, but I digress
) so maybe go sit in church, listen to yourself and find out what and where your faith is. And if the Catholic church is where you find it, put your faith there, and don't let anyone tell you that it doesn't fit.
Good luck!