[blueerica]

I think there's a difference in having fun and making someone a butt of a joke.

Case in point: There's this new girl at my store, Stacey. She was kind of shy at first, but she tells me she has the same polo shirt I was wearing. I jump straight into teenager mode, jump up and down and say: "OH MY GAWD! We totally have to wear it on the same day! We'll be like TWINS!! They'll never be able to tell us apart!"

She paused. I don't think she knew what to say - she's black - and when I say black, I don't mean caramel. We're talking dark like the coffee I brew. Obviously, not a lot of people "go there" with her, out of sensitivity, out of fear, or maybe even some sense of shame (which is wrong, too!) passed down. After a moment, she laughed, and I got to know a whole different Stacey.

She's not the butt of the joke here - maybe in a sense, I was. I put myself there, after all.

I was told by a co-worker that she hated when she was called "my black friend" and I would also assume that applies to anyone in any "different" type of community. Ideally, someone's my friend - minus the prefix.