Why being popular isn't everything it is cut out to be...

[DisneyFan25863]

When I entered high school, I was a loner. I had a few friends, but the majority of my free time was spent in the band room or studying by myself in the quad. I would look over and see the "popular" kids socializing and having fun, wishing I could be like them. I made a vow to myself that, someday, I would become one of them. Everyone would know my name, and I would be able to sit at the "cool" tables, just like them. I changed the way I looked. My hair transformed from a boyish trim to a modern pseudo-spike. I bought new clothed...Vans, Hurley, Quicksilver...the stuff they wore. I stopped using complex words in my vocabulary, even down to saying "me and..." rather than "..and I" because it sounded cooler. I became more social, going to parties and meeting more and more people.

Halfway through my Sophomore year, I decided to run for ASB Vice President. Against everyone's expectations, I actually won. People knew who I was. I slowly had started to slip into the realm of the "cool" people..yet I still wasn't there. I contined thinking of ways to acheive my goal through my Junior year, when I ran for President and won. Suddenly, everyone knew my name. People I didn't even know would ask me how I was. I was invited to come hang out at the "cool" table that I had longed to be at for so long. My friends changed. My hobbies changed. I got voted into Winter Formal Court, and was paired with one of the most popular girls in the school to be the one I escorted. She knew my name, even though we had never met previously.

I felt like I was on top of the world.


And yet, I still feel just as empty inside as I did as the Freshmen looking in. Except now I'm looking out. While I have kept my old friends, I realize the new ones I have met are not friends with me because of the way I think or feel. It's about how I look, talk, and act. I've climbed to the top, and I realize now that it is nothing like I thought it was. People are more concered with the next A&F store opening than getting into college. It's considered normal to spend your Friday night getting so drunk you don't remember where your house is...and then to have your friends post pictures all over MySpace about it. Friendships are constantly ruined as drama over the stupidest detail force people to consider suicide.

I feel like an actor playing a part he doesn't fit.

Being popular isn't all it's cut out to be.