Join The Club

[Gemini Cricket]

Join The Club
By Gemini Cricket


Jane Same tried to join The Club,
The Man told her that her hair was too dark.

She dyed her hair.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her new hair,
But said her eyes were too dark.

Jane Same got colored contacts.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her eyes,
But said that her skin was the wrong color.

Jane Same bleached her skin.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her skin,
But said that she was too short.

Jane Same put lifts in her shoes.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her height,
But said that she was too fat.

Jane Same got liposuction.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her weight,
But said that she was too old.

Jane Same got plastic surgery.

Jane Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked her youthful look,
But said she was the wrong gender.

Jane Same got a sex change.

John Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked his masculinity,
But said that he wasn’t of the right faith.

John Same changed his religion.

John Same went back to join The Club.
The Man liked the cut of his robes,
But said that he couldn’t afford their dues.

John Same became rich.

John Same went back to join The Club.
The Man took his membership fee with glee
And opened the door to their Club.

John Same walked through the doors
He saw a room filled
With expensive chairs and mahogany tables
Tiffany lamps and marble mantels
Ashtrays from Paris and Cigars from Cuba
It reeked of established dignity and nobility

John Same saw another man in the room.
He walked up to him but stopped.
He looked into a gilded mirror
And saw someone he didn’t know.

“Who the fu ck let you in here?!” John Same scoffed.