The Swank Manifesto

[€uroMeinke]

The Swank Manifesto

Let me give it to you straight.

Long ago, some hipsters were digging on the Disney scene and started hanging out at one of their crash pads. But one real cool hep kitten there got the boot. So we picked up our bags and hit a new joint, but man that place was loaded with ickies who really put a funk in our groove.

Then the hipsters got wise to the fact that while Disney was cool, there was a whole swanky world out there and it was time to build our own digs – the Lounge of Tomorrow, where we could groove on Disney and all the other swank and hip things of the world.

We’re cool with those other Disney pads; a lot of swank hipsters still hang there. This place is extra, it’s the side of bacon – and we like it that way.

If you want to be hip to our swank manifesto – here’s what you gotta know:

First off – watch your Mojo

Mojo comes in good and bad. You can give it and you can take it. Just click on the bongos by anyone’s post and give them the mojo they deserve. Open your control panel to see where your mojo is coming from.

If your good mojo is high, you’re grooving with the rest of us swanksters. If your mojo is low – well, maybe your swank needs to be retooled, or this joint just ain’t happening for you.

When we ask some hipsters to help with the joint, we’ll be looking for those with the good mojo.

More about Mojo

So you really want to know about mojo?

• If you want to give mojo you gotta be seen in the Lounge - 30 posts gets you started
• If you want to give mojo, you gotta have some mojo first - you need a mojo of 10 (psst, that's how much mojo you start with)
• You can give mojo to at most 20 swankers a day
• You’ve got to give mojo to at least 7 cats or kittens before you can give some more to someone who really grooves you
• If you get a lot of Mojo (200) you'll have more mojo to give
• If you are a highly active swanker (1000 posts) you'll also give more mojo
• If you stick around awhile (365 days) you'll bestow mojo like manna

Dirty Pictures

Hey we’re hip to the beauty of the human form, but it is so not swanky to have anyone’s eyes bug out if they’re hit with adult content where they don’t expect to see it. And we don’t expect to see it here at the Lounge of Tomorrow. Remember, some of us have to answer to the Man, so keep your posts workplace safe.

Please nix any visuals of an adult or sexual nature in posts, avatars, or anywhere else. Keep them for more private digs. You can, if you must, link to adult pages, but even too much of that puts a crimp in our groove.

Breaking the Law

You know there are some crazy laws on the books, and the fuzz is just itching to use any one of them to shut down swank joints like this. So post as though The Man were watching. Keep mum about anything you wouldn’t want the coppers to see. If it’s not legal, if it’s outlaw, keep it so far on the down-low that it’s nowhere near this joint.

Fightin’ Words

Hey man, we’re all about free expression here. But the hipsters of the Lounge of Tomorrow are hep to Ghandi and Martin Luther King – we dig the peace here. So just don’t go picking fights with the cats and kittens who groove around here.

Think about what you are going to post, and if anyone might think them’re fightin’ words, then that’s the time to count to ten, and change your tone before you post.

Personal insults, personal attacks, or broad insults against a group of people that real people are a part of have no place at the Lounge of Tomorrow.

Who’s In and Who’s Out

We run some smooth digs around here, so please don’t freak out anyone’s groove. Be your own kinda cat and all that, but if you ruffle too many feathers on our beatnik birdies, we may pull you aside to have a word or two. We’ll try to clue you in on how to play nice around here, and we’ll give you every chance to bend on to the mend.

We'll tell you once, we'll tell you twice, but then we must come down a little salty on you. After two warnings, we may ask you to chill and your account can be suspended. Maybe you need a day, maybe a week, maybe even more.

We’d like you all to improve your mojo, but we know there are some cats out there who we may have to show the door. We’ll do our best to be fair and consider your place in our community, but if you’re here to just rankle our swank, perhaps you ought to try one of the other joints in town.

[wendybeth]

Thiis quite possibly the funnest list of rules I've ever read. Certainly the swankiest!