Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull [use spoiler tags, please]

[LashStoat]

Well, Lashbear and I saw Indy 4 – in fact we have now seen it twice. I’m glad the film exists, as I have always enjoyed “the wild ride” nature of the Indy series. A bit of “suspension of disbelief” is not in itself a bad thing – unless it’s done …umm… badly.

These things come to mind (in order of badly first):

• The Tarzan scene. Fvck that was bad.
• Nazca gets 0.75” of rain/year. That’s why the glyphs have survived all this time. With three waterfalls, it must have been the CGI rainy season. In fact, it was the CGI everything season. Glyphs, forest and temple in the same shot.
• Selective magnetism controlled by a hessian sack, but not a sealed metal crate.
• How does one reset those 2 billion ton sand-controlled obelisks?
• Secreted natives dropping from (irreplaceable?) carvings in the ceiling. Do they get fed through a straw on mashed bugs and moss juice?
• Angry natives in general – who, what, where, why?
• Thirteen crystal skeletons do not equal one fleshy space geek.
• Poison darts have poison tips, not poison shafts.
• A lead-lined refrigerator. WTF? I want cold food, not heavy food.
• Jeeps as fast as a rocket sled (as spotted by G.D)
• TV being played to fiberglass dummies.
• Running water outside, but not inside “Kaboom Town”.

I’m sure that your list will be the same but different to mine. That’s OK though – different strokes for different folks. Except for the Tarzan scene. Fvck that was bad. Perhaps I'll wait for a "Directors Cut" version before I buy the four-disc trilogy, and hope the vines are the first to go...

Love and hugs,

The Stoat.