13 Books "No One" Has Read

[Alex]

Of course, since this is supposedly a list of books people most often lie about having read, this entire thread is immediately suspect.

The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer - No,and no interest in doing so.
Democracy in America by Alexis de Tocqueville - Yes, and I've read Volume 1 twice.
Ulysses by James Joyce - No.
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens - I find Dickens to be essentially unreadable. The very embodiment of the horror that is Victorian novels. And I've given him many chances since my favorite prof in college was a Dickens scholar and I wanted to be able to kiss his ass. But it wasn't worth the pain. However, A Christmas Carol is so short I was able to get through it.
The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie - No.
Moby Dick by Herman Melville - Significant parts but I've never made it to the end.
Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace - No, no interest based on other stuff of his I've read.
A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking - Yes.
Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust - No.
The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco - No.
Don Quixote by Cervantes - I've read the first third about a dozen times and never make it farther. And since everything that popular culture knows about Don Quixote happens in that first third, I assume nobody else ever gets any farther either. But that part is pretty good.
War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy - Yes. Crime and Punishment is perhaps the best novel of all time so I disagree with the comment above, but I did make it through War and Peace.
As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner - No. Does anybody actually read any Faulkner any more?